


A Dream Life?

by LinaLuthor



Series: Dreamwalkers [2]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Developing Friendships, Developing Relationship, Dreams and Nightmares, Dreamsharing, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Is Rhea Ok?, White Clouds
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-19
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:41:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 70,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26544643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LinaLuthor/pseuds/LinaLuthor
Summary: Byleth and Edelgard finally meet each other in real life and not only in dreams. As Byleth is indeed called to be a professor in the esteemed Officers Academy, the two navigate this new dynamic to their relationship while exploring the mysteries that permeate Garreg Mach.
Relationships: Edelgard von Hresvelg/My Unit | Byleth
Series: Dreamwalkers [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1930285
Comments: 52
Kudos: 94





	1. The Garreg Mach Monastery

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! It's time for take two xD There aren't so many changes to this chapter, at least not to what happens in it when compared to the last version, but still. I hope you enjoy it and the new series in a sense!

The Oghma mountains were known as a natural barrier, one that protected not only those who lived in the several, small villages which dotted the place, but also many species of animals and plants that could not be found anywhere else in Fódlan. Its status as a haven stood to this day, even more so since it marked the fronteers between the three nations coexisting in the continent and was home to the one neutral territory in all of it, the famous Garreg Mach monastery. 

For how famous the place was, it was odd that Byleth had only heard about it from Edelgard during the many dreams they had shared throughout the years. Dreams that they never thought would one day spill into reality, or that they would get to meet as they just had a few hours ago. When the mercenary turned to look at the young woman who strolled beside her, she couldn’t keep a beam away from her face, one that was mirrored the moment the princess met her gaze. It was too easy for them to get lost in each other’s eyes, to forget that this wasn’t just another dream but reality itself.

And that there were other people around them that would indeed find it more than weird that Imperial princess Edelgard von Hresvelg was trading silent smiles with a mercenary they had just met. 

It still felt surreal that they were that close, though. The night they had spent together was incredibly sweet, the memories of it quickly bringing tears of joy to Edelgard’s eyes. They had hugged and kissed even more than they usually did in their dreams. And the best part? It had not been a dream at all, but reality gracing them a moment that could have seemed preordained, no matter how many times both girls would say they had never managed to work out a way for them to meet before. 

Hence the trip from Remire village to the monastery was going as smoothly as if they were both gliding instead of leaving from a place full of people who thanked them from expelling the thieves, then making their way through a forest with abundant foliage which shone emerald under the soft sunlight and the open, stark blue sky. Although they had both seen such sights too many times in their lives, both Byleth and Edelgard couldn’t help but feel wonder at it, at the beauty of that morning and the way the world was still the same, but not the same at all. 

They had found one another. They had fought together in a more synched way than they ever had with former friends or allies who had known them for years. And they had not been forced to part ways, thanks to the insistent, boisterous Alois, who walked in front of them chattering happily alongside a grumpy Jeralt. The sounds of laughter and grunts, the chirping birds and their steps across the somewhat rocky trail underneath their feet was the perfect background noise to the two women’s mood, their wonder and fascination with reality as well as anticipation of what would come next. 

“There it is, Garreg Mach monastery,” Edelgard said in a solemn voice, once the path they had been walking on opened and they had a clearer vision of the place she had been calling home for the last few months. It was impossible not to smile at it, at the warm feeling that was nuzzling in her chest at the sight of it - and of the taller woman beside her, who had been hearing descriptions about it from months whenever they dreamed together.

“It looks pretty impressive for a school,” Byleth commented, visibly awed at it and at Edelgard’s accuracy when telling her about it. 

Maybe it was the way the sun fell over the monastery on that particular day, but the stony structure shone white and silver underneath it. The tall walls and turrets surrounding it made the place look like a pain to raid, even more so given how up in the mountains it already was, the natural rocks covered with vegetation already offering some protection as it was. From their vantage point, there wasn’t much to be seen outside of its defences and one peculiar, interestingly huge building that seemed to loom behind the others with an assortment of towers big and small. 

“We are still too far to glimpse some of its details, but I cannot wait until you see what it’s like on the inside,” the princess answered with another smile. The mere notion that Byleth was being brought along with their little party made her heart lurch again, even if there was no guarantee she would get to stay. She wanted to believe the woman would, though, but it was better to not have any expectations about the entire matter anyways. 

“Me too, El. And I’ll do my best to stick by your side,” she whispered, as if reading Edelgard’s mind - it wouldn’t surprise any of them if their connection was that strong, either. “I wonder what is the story behind these two.” She pointed at her father, who was shaking his head at whatever Alois had said. 

Byleth and Edelgard had been walking slower than the others the entire time, with a few Knights of Seiros behind them, Claude and Dimitri in front and then Alois, Jeralt and the rest of the knights leading the way. The distance was a comfort, since that meant they were able to have their own conversation without being overheard - or so they hoped - but they had indeed noticed the others giving them pointed stares whenever they were strolling a bit too close, hands almost brushing and lacing together on instinct alone.

It would be a challenge to pretend there was nothing but camaraderie between two fighters going on between them, they thought and grimaced at the exact same time. 

“Hm? Isn’t your father the famous Jeralt, former captain of the Knights of Seiros? Truthfully, you should have told me you were _the_ Blade Breeaker’s daughter,” Edelgard inquired once she registered what Byleth had just said and found it odd. Everyone in Garreg Mach had heard about Jeralt, known due to his formidable strength and expertise in the battlefield. Although they had talked some about their parents throughout the years, the princess thought the woman was well-aware of that fact. 

“I- that’s new to me, to be honest,” Byleth deadpanned, unsure about how to react. She and her father hadn’t exchanged too many words about the past and mostly were known for focusing on the next job, the next mission and making sure they got their payment when it was due. “That does explain why that guy was so happy to find him, then.”

“It does.” Edelgard eyed the frowning woman with a concerned glance, but a part of her knew better than to pry.

Their steps became quieter as the path went from mostly rocky, uneven and rough, to grassy, soft and supportive soil. There were barely any trees around them and the sun was a comfort in that chilly day. It had been a colder beginning of the year when compared to the ones before, but the sky had often been as blue and cloudless as it was on that day.

The sight was incredible to look at and the princess drew comfort from it, from being in an open field with a companion she had never expected to meet warming her with her presence alone. She was about to make a remark on it, changing the subject from a tenser one when a voice cut through her thoughts. 

“Hey Dimitri, if we leave our new friend with Your Royalness the Imperial Princess, we’ll be robbed of the chance to actually make a new friend,” Claude bellowed, turning around with a smirk and not missing the fact that the two women were standing close, closer than was usual for the circumstance. “No offense, your princessliness, but you do have a tendency to brag about Le Empire and its glory.”

“Oh, apologies if me stating a fact makes you feel uncomfortable,” Edelgard countered with a small smile on her lips. Her cheeks were almost flaring due to the giggle she heard beside her and the way Dimitri was chuckling. “And if memory serves, it did feel like you yourself were trying to recruit her to the Alliance last night.”

“Can you really blame me?” Claude shrugged, as both boys slowed down to fall into step with them. “With her skills on the battlefield by my side, I’m sure there’s no way the other dukes in the conference table will ignore me. Or keep treating me as a damn kid.”

“That sounds more like you using her for your own schemes than befriending her, though,” Dimitri was keen to point out, then smiled once it was Edelgard’s time to chuckle. He had been looking after her since they met at the reception party and it was rare to see her so carefree like that. He wondered if Byleth had anything to do with that, or maybe it was just the relief at them being alive after what had happened in Remire. 

“You think of me as nothing but a schemer.” Claude put a hand to his heart, his voice becoming dramatic to the point that even the mercenary was softly laughing. “You wound me so.”

“Yes, and we can see through your antics too. I shall do everything in my power to prevent our… newfound friend from falling victim to them,” Edelgard commented, unsure about how to define Byleth as of then.

The princess hoped her choice of words was ok and she hadn’t stalled for too long, then internally sighed when that banter went on for the rest of the way to the monastery grounds. Although she wished she and Byleth had some privacy to talk about what was going on, about how magical it was that they had stepped into each other’s worlds instead of only in their dreams, she had to admit the atmosphere around the four of them was one of the most heartwarming things she had experienced in a long time. 

To the point that, if she closed her eyes to the future that was already looming in front of them, poised over her shoulders and coiled around her neck, she could even relax and think she had actually found a place to belong. 

That feeling was accentuated the closer they got to the monastery, even if a part of her worried if that was the place where she and Byleth would part ways. Somehow, a strong intuition told her there was nothing to worry about, one that became stronger the moment the two of them shared a glance and for a brief second the girl could swear she saw the woman holding tomes and books on both of her hands. 

Perhaps something of the sorts had happened to both of them, since they widened their eyes at the same moment before looking away and replying to Claude’s insinuation that Byleth would be a great sparring instructor and probably way better than the one they had at the moment. The irony of that comment, and how actually all four of them had been stunned into silence for a second wasn’t lost on any of them, the tension it brought a bit uncomfortable until Dimitri remarked how that would be a dream come true, then showering praises upon the mercenary that walked with them.

Both the princess and the mercenary had to try really hard to not laugh at that little remark about dreams. Not that anyone would get to know but still. Their secret would remain safe no matter what.

They became more quiet when they passed through the first stone turrets that marked the entrance to the monastery, awed at the close up view of the impressive building and the way it stood against the horizon, sharp and imposing on the softness of that morning. Towers speared the sky in their might and when they glanced up they saw people looking down at them through ample, arched windows. 

The security was as rigid as Byleth had expected it to be, meaning even the wyverns and pegasi which flew around in circles would easily be shot down if they were unwanted. Probably few or no things went unsupervised and although that was expected in such an important place, that made the mercenary weary instead of comforted. 

Too much protection wasn’t as good as many people thought, she pondered once their party got to the end of the slope that led to the main gates and they were met with a sprawling marketplace. Byleth had heard about it, about the various fares that were offered and how convenient it was that so many different things were brought to the students and the staff on a daily basis. There were tents of several colors to the left and the right, some looking as if they had taken residence there for years on end, the wires and cords which held them upright rusty and made thin with time. People yelled their prices and goods, looking left and right at potential customers, their different accents, clothing and offerings making a nice, somewhat harmonious contrast alongside each other.

Byleth had to be pulled away from both a weapons tent that was a regular and a newcomer food one more to the side, which had grilled fish kebabs and other treats on display. She pouted a bit at it since she had wanted to get something for herself and the other House Leaders - their breakfast hadn’t been as filling as it was needed for such a long walk anyways, but apparently they had somewhere more important to be.

Or at least that was the feeling Byleth got, even more so when she had the distinct impression someone was looking very intently at her. She felt the imprint and the weight of an invisible, unfamiliar stare lodging itself on her back, making the hairs on her arms stand on end. Yet no matter how much she searched, she wasn’t able to find the culprit and after a few seconds just followed the others anyways.

The four ascended rocky stairs and watched as Alois, Jeralt and the Knights of Seiros were eagerly saluted by a gatekeeper ( _the_ Gatekeeper, the students were eager to inform her once they too were greeted by him), then fell into a circle once they passed through a wide, vaulted entrance lined with white rocks and into a wide room. The ceiling was so high and darkened, she could barely make out the details painted into the several domes which adorned it. The floor was smooth, polished rock and there were several pillars around, too. 

While she was in awe of what Dimitri eagerly informed her was the Entrance Hall, some students dressed in their black and golden uniforms passed by and gave them curious glances that lingered the most on Byleth, her father and a retreating Alois. The woman was well-aware of how at odds she looked due to her clothing and different appearance, her long, fluffy, untamed hair and the dagger hanging on her waist. Or maybe it was how close she was to the three House Leaders at once - and the fact they weren't seen socializing that often amongst themselves, let alone with a newcomer in tow. 

Nevertheless she shrugged off that extra attention and focused on the three kids in front of her, more so on Edelgard and the beautiful smile that tried and failed to hide the uncertainty in her eyes. No one knew what they were supposed to do now, when and how they would see each other next and how to behave amongst so many people right then. The uncertainty, albeit inevitable, was surely crushing. It would be ironic if they had met only to be separated so fastly, wouldn't it?

The princess had a sudden idea and was about to ask if Byleth wanted a tour of the monastery when Jeralt approached them, his demeanor pained and closed off, as if he had just been granted some very bad news. 

“Alois just went to tell Lady Rhea of our arrival and your help with the students. I suppose this means we’ll get some sort of reward at the very least,” he said, his distaste for the situation - and the fact he had a feeling that wouldn’t be all there was to it - plain for everyone to see. “In the meantime I think you gotta let those kiddos go, they need some rest and food too. Twas quite the journey we did.” In a smaller, almost unheard voice, he added: "I'd forgotten what pain this climb was."

A second later he almost chuckled at the glare he received from his daughter and the princess beside her. It would be funnier if they didn’t have an audience, even more so one that could judge and pester the poor girl to no end if that reaction was noted. While he was no stranger to love and understood the need to stay close (even more so in their case, when they had been apart for that long), he returned their defiant glances with an even one that begged them to be cautious. 

“He’s right, I’d die for some good food and a bed right now. Preferably both at the same time if possible,” Claude agreed in a cheerful tone, crossing his arms behind his head. 

“Do not complain when a rat comes to your room at night due to all the crumbs you have dropped in your bed, though,” Dimitri taunted, surprised when the sheer mention of rats made Edelgard look at him in annoyance. “Or hm, roaches and lesser bugs.” He sounded sheepish when adding it, almost apologetic. Was that something he should know?

“Nah, I’ll deal with them. Or call on both of you to help me, of course. Your princeliness wouldn’t deny my request like that, would you?” His tone was again dramatic, but this time he received icy stares instead of laughter. “Jeez, chill, you gotta loosen up in this stuffy place too. I liked you better when we were out of here. Almost looks like it sucked the good mood out of you.”

“If you have nothing else more important to say, you should take your leave instead of boring the poor newcomers to death,” Edelgard said in a menacing way, wishing the two would go so she could have at least a few final words with Byleth in peace. 

Her wish was granted when Claude did indeed nod and bow. “Sure enough! Nice meeting ya and hit me up if you ever want a job in the Alliance. Also, I promise you I’m not as formal and stiff as those other two, so please consider that, ok? We'll have loads of fun.” He told Byleth almost in a conspiratorial tone, then winked at her and went ahead towards somewhere on the left, which she supposed was the kitchen since there were some pretty good smells wafting from there.

“I hope you do not think of us in that manner, Miss Byleth.” Dimitri shook his head, his shining blue eyes pained in a mixture of exasperation and disbelief. “I do not know if we shall see each other again, but you have my gratitude for the help back in the village.” He bowed deeply, right fist closed over his heart and the other arm behind his back as a sign of deference. “Have a great stay in the Garreg Mach monastery and if you need anything, please feel free to call on me.”

“Thank you, prince Dimitri. Good day,” Byleth answered, overwhelmed by all that attention and the respect they were showering her with. It was definitely something she wasn’t used to. Shouldn't she be the one treating them like that? They were royalty after all. 

She watched the prince retreat and go straight ahead instead of turning towards the kitchen like Claude had done. That was when she realized how his precise steps lacked cadence, almost as if there were something else underneath the polished way with which he spoke and behaved. Or maybe she was just reading too much into it and he was just tired from that walk and the night before, too. 

“Are you ok?” Edelgard’s voice made her turn and look at the smaller woman, her unease and apprehension easily read in those hooded lilac irises. The same that had gazed upon her first in fear, then trust, companionship and love as the years went by and that horrible dungeon was left behind. 

Those were the same eyes Byleth had spent many years convincing herself she would probably never see in the real world, and had resigned to meet with almost every night as she fell asleep. It was better than nothing of course, to get to know that amazing girl during their dreams, and a delight that they had found each other then.

She wanted to touch the princess, to commit to memory the feeling of her presence, of her skin, her hair and her lips, the physicality of it all in that sole moment. She wanted to do so regardless of the fact that they weren’t alone and her father was practically telling them to not stand that close together. At that point in time, no matter the outcome, she wanted to forget about consequences, yet knew better than to compromise the girl she had grown to love over so many years.

“Yeah, I’m good. And you?” Byleth replied, ignoring Jeralt and taking a step towards Edelgard, so their hands brushed and they beamed at it.

“I - I don’t know, to be frank. I suppose my biggest wish is that you will not be taken away from me so soon, but there is no way to know for sure, is there?” El turned saddened eyes at the woman in front of her, also uncaring that some others were looking at them a bit too much. Let them stare, she thought. They had been together but apart for too long already.

“Me too, El. But hey, maybe they’ll be so thankful they’ll hire me to be your bodyguard here, or something,” Byleh joked, trying to soften up the mood even if her chest was clenching at the thought of being sent away. “Or I can sneak out and come here at times, who knows. I do have a feeling this isn’t goodbye, though.” And it was true. For some reason, the woman could see herself staying for a while in that place. 

It was relieving to see the princess smile and nod, though there was still a tinge of unease in her irises. “Indeed. Let us do everything in our power to make sure this isn’t farewell.” She thought for a while, weight shifting between her feet. It wasn’t like her to be that restless, but then when had a situation like that presented itself? “Please do tell me about the rest of your day tonight, ok?”

“Always.” The beam that spread through Byleth’s face made even Jeralt do the same; it was rare for her to show emotions like that. “Have a great day, Edelgard. And do rest up, if you don’t have too much to do as of now.”

“I will. Goodbye, Byleth, Captain Jeralt.” She bowed at each of them in turn, but only after squeezing the woman’s hand and silently wishing the universe wasn’t having fun at her expense in some way or the other. 

As she turned around and walked away towards her quarters with Byleth’s stare softly caressing her back until she was outside of the Entrance Hall, making her way towards the lake, she was unable to keep a frown away from her face. The cruel idea that they had been brought together only to be pulled apart again a few hours later made her reel, so that Hubert did a double take the moment they met close to the greenhouse. Too late to mask her expression, she told him about the mission and them being saved by two mercenaries, one of which being Jeralt, but no matter how much he eyed her with concern, she didn’t elaborate on the reason behind her sudden bout of anxiety. 

In the end it was a delight to lock herself in her room and pick up a book from her pile of required reading for the week to come. Not that she would ever pay attention to it, but it would be infinitely better to pretend she was studying than to deal with other people that could pry her with questions about what had just happened back there. Later on she would face her classmates, get something to eat. Once her heart and her mind has stopped bothering her with questions and what-ifs.

* * *

It didn’t take long before Alois returned and guided them through the monastery after saying Lady Rhea had requested an audience with them. Byleth had looked at her father at the right moment to note a grimace make its way into his face even when he met the other man’s glance and silently nodded.

That was completely unlike Jeralt - it was rare for him to accept anything that he was displeased or didn't agree with, be it jobs or rewards. She had grown up seeing him deny such things, only to watch him look helpless in that particular scenario for some reason. 

Curious, she fell into step beside him and whispered: “Why didn’t you tell me you used to be a Knight of Seiros?” She wanted to ask more, since she didn’t even know who that Seiros was and how important they could be in order to have knights alloted in their name, but knew better than to press her father like that. He wasn’t one to talk about tough matters and too many questions would make him shut her off.

Even that small one had that effect, apparently, as he gave her a pained, hooded stare while they got out of the Entrance Hall and walked on a rocky path between two walls. He took a while to respond, so long that she thought she would never hear something about it. “That was real while ago and honestly those aren’t my favorite memories either. This place, it… It has too much to it, in a way.”

Byleth tilted her head, unsure about what to make of it - or of Garreg Mach per se. It was a beautiful place, exuberant in a form that was unique and different from any other noble building they had ever been to throughout their quests around Fódlan as mercenaries. There was an aura which permeated every corner of the place, though, something that felt alien and as if it didn't really belong to everything else in there.

She couldn’t put her finger on what it was exactly, but as they meandered around, then went into a building, up a flight of stairs and into what Alois called the Audience Chamber, she felt some unease and distress uncoil around the pit of her stomach. It wasn’t because the interiors were dark and too decorated, or having to always rely on candlelight to make something visible. Or how grandiose and big it was, making most people feel small in comparison. No, it was something else, something more, but since she couldn’t really tell why, she simply shrugged and looked around herself, chalking it off to a strange case of nerves at it being her first time in a religious setting. 

The room they were in was equally gloomy, even though scant light reached down the colored, stony floor since the windows were located high in the walls to the right and the left, plus a sole one standing behind a throne right in front of them. That one was made of stained glass in tones of green, purple, blue, red and yellow. Some candelabras hang from the ceiling in the space around them, helping to dilute the gloomy aura and giving a solemn aspect to the place. Statues stood under arched vaults in the walls on both sides of the place, probably of religious figures she'd never heard about. Everything was in place and very clean, she noted, but even so the one feeling she could get was a chilling anticipation, something charring and heavy instead of clean and light.

Even more so when Byleth’s eyes fell on the woman that occupied the throne - and somehow recognized the strength of the piercing glance aimed at her as the one who had looked at her back in the marketplace. She was tall, with curly green hair arranged behind a heavily decorated tiara and falling on waves over her shoulders, which were encased in a long white dress and a cape. Everything about her demeanor was regal and composed, except for those emerald eyes which bore into Byleth with something unsettling. 

It was almost as if that stranger was analyzing her, deeming her worthy or not even though they had just met and, as far as Byleth knew, the other woman should be thanking her instead of testing her mettle in some weird way. The man who stood beside her, with equally green hair, green eyes and an outfit that made him look important, was doing the same in a less blatant way, looking at her through the corner of his eyes.

Byleth stood proudly beside her father, determined to neither be affected nor intimidated by them. It wasn’t as if she had done anything that justified her feeling like that to begin with. The slight tension was amplified when the woman rose from her seat and slowly, gracefully paced, her steps as imposing as the monastery itself, as if she were the personification of it. Which, Byleth learned in the next moment, she was, in the sense that as the archbishop that meant she was the most important figure in that church (what was it called again? She couldn’t quite remember).

To say the mercenary couldn’t pay attention to that conversation was an understatement. She formally bowed when introductions were done and didn’t miss the part about her father being rehired as a Knight of Seiros - she wanted to ask who Seiros was, but decided it was better to stay quiet on it - and the way she was thanked for her services and for protecting the students. Other than that, all the words that were meant to offer warmth and praise were lost to her. She was more interested in the way that Rhea person was eyeing her, as if expecting something from Byleth or trying to look inside her very essence in order to find the answer to a silent question. 

“Well, it will be explendid to have you back, Captain Jeralt. Your service was always a great source of joy and for me and I am sure she would approve of it,” Rhea said, taking her eyes away from Byleth to address her father for one second, before setting them on her again. “Now, I wouldn’t be so cruel as to send you away without an offer too. Alois has spoken grandly about your prowess on the battlefield and the way you seemed to bond with the students on the path back to the monastery. Seeing this, and how one of our professors did abandon the camp at the first sight of danger, I would like to ask you to please fill in for his role.”

“Lady Rhea, if you excuse me, is it really prudent to give such a position to a newcomer, someone we have never seen before? A professor is responsible for molding and shaping the young minds they teach, something which is even more important given the type of students that attend our esteemed Officers Academy,” the man beside her intervened, his scowl judgemental and more than likely thinking that Byleth was unfit for the job. 

Something that, although she and Edelgard had joked about in the past, she had to agree with. Even if Claude had thought the same. 

“I appreciate your concern, Seteth, but she is Captain Jeralt’s daughter. Surely you understand this already means her skills must be unparalleled. Alois attested as much and I, for one, would like to believe that the Goddess has been kind with her blessings and has gifted us not only our former captain, but also an incredible professor.” Rhea turned to smile at him, though something in her gaze made the man flinch instead of peacefully comply. 

“O-of course, the Goddess has more than often done things like those,” Seteth grumbled, not entirely convinced about that arrangement but well-aware that there was nothing he could do to change Rhea’s mind. His face was completely closed off and the slightest bit hostile when he glanced at Byleth next. “Well, if that is indeed the case, you shall be entrusted with the Blue Lions classroom, as the cowardly knave who called himself a professor was responsible for them before.”

Although she nodded and thanked them before being dismissed alongside her father, Byleth didn’t know exactly how to feel about that. Sure, she had had no choice in the matter and yes, she already knew she wasn’t going to be teaching Edelgard’s class, which was a letdown, but there was no denying how happy she was that she wasn’t about to be sent away from the monastery, from the place where the girl she loved was living it.

The moment they left the Audience Chamber, Jeralt loudly sighed and turned to her with an apologetic expression. “Sorry you got dragged to this, kiddo. If only Alois hadn’t seen me...”

“You can always say no if you don’t want to be a knight again,” Byleth replied, shrugging as if that was common knowledge. It had been, to that day. Jeralt had denied enough jobs if they seemed sketchy. 

The fact that he humorlessly laughed at her as if she had just told the stupidest joke of the century, made something akin to dread crawl up her spine. Or maybe it was seeing her father look helpless, a word she would have never attributed to him before that day. “One doesn’t say no to Rhea, it’s not that simple. Also, I dunno what sort of impression you got of her, but please do watch out for her. Sometimes things are not as they seem to be at first.”

She nodded at that, as it resonated to the strange feeling she had gotten from the woman as well. For being the biggest representative of a religion, whatever it was, the archbishop had seemed a bit too cold and calculating, instead of warm and welcoming. But then, Byleth knew nothing of such matters and shouldn’t be passing judgement like that, much less because Rhea had done the same to her. Whatever her reasons for that were.

“I just don’t understand why they want me to teach. I’ve no background to begin with,” she mumbled, pensive, wondering when the first day of class was, where her classroom was at and what the hell she was supposed to do with her students - whoever they were. Too many questions and no answers at all. “I’d be ok with being Edelgard’s bodyguard or whatever.”

“Ha, that’s priceless. Don’t think they’d let you do that but even so,” he laughed, this time with genuine mirth behind it. “In any case, try not being too obvious with your little girlfriend. She’s an important person to begin with and I’m pretty sure it can get both of you into trouble if you’re too affectionate with her. I know how love is, I’ve had that before,” he added at her little pout, internally grateful to see how many emotions were passing through her face as of then. “I’m just warning you, is all.”

She nodded anyways, a part of her knowing that was the truth. A moment later he said his goodbye and went to what he called his office, saying she could check on it whenever she was free - and that she would always be welcome to go visit him. 

It was interesting to watch him go and know they wouldn’t be working together anymore. She wondered what that feeling in her chest was, if it could be called some sort of loss or if she was just anticipating what that would be like. She couldn’t remember a day in which they hadn’t been mercenaries, fighting, planning and carrying out some mission or another in silent, amicable company. Now she would be alone, facing a class full of kids she had never seen before and none of them were her beloved princess.

_“You’re awfully sentimental for someone who has just met the girl in real life.”_

The thought came unbridled, in a voice that wasn’t her own and taking her aback with how foreign it was, but how familiar in a sense. As if she knew who it belonged to and why it was speaking to her head even though she was pretty positive such a thing was weird to say the least.

 _“Have you all but forgotten about me? Sure, ever since the little princess came into your dreams we haven’t seen much of each other but still. I was there before her, you know. That is really disrespectful of you,”_ the voice said again, and this time it was matched with an image that Byleth was sure she had seen before.

The image of a small girl, a child, with flowing green hair and eyes not unlike Rhea's, though much livelier, pointy ears and a flowing purple dress, complete with golden adornments here and there. 

For a second Byleth did think she could remember what that voice mentioned, of dreams long gone where a throne was present and she would talk to that little kid. It had indeed been a long time ago, however, and a lot had changed. For some reason, she thought that perhaps it shouldn't be the case. 

_"Well, since you apparently have a very bad memory, allow me to introduce myself again. My name is Sothis and don't you ever call me a child again."_ That last part had a biting tone to it, one that made Byleth snicker even though that was rewarded with a painful pang in her head.

 _"Ouch, ok, I get it,"_ Byleth experimented thinking and was satisfied when it felt like they were properly communicating. _"What are you doing in my head though?"_

That question was met with silence and half-started sentences that were abandoned halfway. In the end the voice just gave up and admitted, _"I feel like I should know, but I just don't. In any case, there must be a reason behind it, so maybe we- "_

"Would you kindly follow me to your room, Professor?" 

Byleth almost jumped in place when that man from before, Seteth, approached her and uttered that, the same scowl still in his face. Maybe it was part of his features already, so much he was seen doing that. In any case, the woman complied once she realized she was standing in front of the Audience Chamber and went downstairs behind him, thanking the silence and lack of conversation both in and outside of her head for allowing her to make a mental map of the monastery. 

Of the place that would be her home for a while, at least.

* * *

The moment Byleth was left to her own devices, with an actual, physical map of Garreg Mach on her hands and instructions about classes, mealtimes and curfews, she paced inside the room wondering what she should do.

The quarters were bigger than she had imagined them to, what with the many smaller ones she had occupied for different periods of time, and she was grateful for the wooden chest beside the rather large bed located on the left side of the room, the table and chair on the right and the panel with a calendar, which would help her keep track of things with greater ease. She knew there were two boys living beside her, more dorms to the left and even more over her. 

What she didn't know was where Edelgard's was, or where the girl herself was spending her late afternoon to begin with. Byleth had to find her and give her the news, since she had been so worried about what their fate would be after that audience with the archbishop. And while there was always the possibility they could meet in dreams, wouldn't it be better if they talked face to face?

So Byleth cast aside her unease about teaching a class the next morning, her doubts about the monastery per se and her questions about that entire arrangement and picked up the map before getting out of the quarters and going exploring. 

Along the way she saw many interesting things about the monastery and its people. Around the first floor dormitories, there was a girl with heavy-looking, dark brown curls who walked around alongside a woman with short brown hair, both talking animatedly and humming along as well. They turned to examine her as she passed, but no word was said. Further down, close to the greenhouse, she spotted a tall, blonde woman with a blue shawl covering her shoulders alongside a much shorter ginger girl that had a warm, excited expression. They carried some potted plants and a small, blue watering can as well as some seeds. 

Above her, she saw a flash of ginger hair above a deep green wyvern flying around, probably in sentry duty. When she neared the stables there was a girl with a sole heavy braid combing and dreamily caressing a horse. Further on, she spotted Dimitri and Claude discussing something in hushed tones; they just saluted them from afar as she pressed on, though she wished Edelgard had been there as well. 

On and on she went, until she ended up in front of a building that was divided in three rooms, each with a sign of sorts outside of them. In front of it there was a garden area, with some small trees and flowers around it. There were two benches and a few people were sitting, but most of the unused space was complete with cats lazing around and terrorizing some dogs when those dared walking too close.

Byleth smiled when her eyes fell on a well-known speck of straight hair that shone silver under the sunlight and the lilac irises that welcomed her with a beam of their own. There was someone beside her, a tall, broody man with dark hair and pale green eyes, but the mercenary didn't even notice him as she walked to the girl she had spent so many years of her life dreaming with.

Maybe the news she had to give weren't as good as the two of them would have liked. Maybe there was too much they would still have to work through, work with and get to adapt in that new setting. Whatever the case was, what they had been granted with was a beginning and not an ending. And for that particular day, it was also more than just enough.


	2. Lovers and (mock) Battle Enemies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byleth gets to know her students better after a week of lessons, as the final preparations before the mock battle are done.  
> When the time for it finally comes, she sees herself pitied against Edelgard - which is too funny a thing on itself.

Through that first week of classes, or at least on Byleth's first time in a classroom, she had discovered a lot of different things. In a sense the woman considered she was learning as much as her students were. For example, in day one she understood that Felix would question anything she said if she didn't have good background information about it. Annette would take extensive notes, even of her sighs or pauses, and Mercedes would forget to open her notebook at times.

Sylvain liked flirting with whoever he saw, which of course meant he received her in the classroom with a wink and would have blown her a kiss if Ingrid, the knightiest of the knights, hadn’t punched him in the face because of that attitude. As the ginger-haired boy rubbed his cheek to dispel the pain and complained about the red mark that would surely be there in a few, the blonde apologized profusely and assured Byleth that not everyone was like him at all. That sentence was echoed by another student, Ashe, who politely bowed to her before taking a seat on the back of the room.

Then there was the prince himself, who she had met in Remire and was a lot more formal and reserved with his classmates than he had been while in the company of Edelgard and Claude. Which was interesting to say the least, even more so when she noticed his more observant instead of engaging behavior, though he didn’t seem to be aloof and entrenched within his status like some would believe it to be the case.

Especially since, she soon found out, the Blue Lions were known as a class that valued discipline and orderliness, albeit not all of its members seemed able to keep that facade going as well as others.

Last, but certainly not least, was Dedue, the man who towered behind Dimitri and followed his lead no matter what. It was clear there was some deep, strong connection between the two of them that harkened back to the past, as Byleth saw in them some of the features she and Edelgard shared. Like the knowing looks, or how the taller man sometimes just knew what to say or what the prince needed for his comfort even if a request hadn't been voiced at all. 

She wondered if one day she would feel like a part of that group in some sense. That she wouldn’t be seen as an outsider, but an instructor they could trust with way more than just their questions about weapons, war tactics and magical knowledge (the latter, she realized, was a tad more lacking than she wanted it to be - Annette’s queries had her looking up some books during lunch on her first day as a teacher, for example).

It had been all good for that initial week, the woman thought as the last day of lessons began and she led her class towards the training grounds. It was a beautiful morning, with the open skies she had realized were just a part of Garreg Mach’s scenario and the sun which warmed them to a comfortable degree on that chilly spring day. The class trudged behind her, some clearly more excited to be there than others, but that was just good. The same had happened when they remained inside the room for most of the week, to the point that Felix had asked her if she actually wanted them to win the mock battle that would be held on the following day.

She didn’t know if they were eager to show themselves or to test her mettle, but in any case it was amusing how curious they were about her abilities due to all the hearsays that surrounded her being hired as a professor out of the blue. No matter how many times Dimitri had frowned and shook his head at stupidities such as “she is Lady Rhea’s niece” or “she killed all the bandits with one strike of her sword”, they kept going around and being repeated - or started - by some students who thought feeding the rumor mill was a hilarious way to start the year and the new teacher's career.

Well it wasn’t as if she and Edelgard weren’t having some fun laughing at those either, whenever they got together at mealtimes and throughout the day, or in dreams and discussed them. Though usually they did keep themselves to more academic matters especially when in public, as Byleth had no idea what it meant to be a professor or what the curriculum at Garreg Mach entailed. The last thing she wanted was to make a fool of herself and waste her students’ time, which meant that the princess was enlisted to help her out with outlining her classes and making sure she got the right books to read in order to have good information to pass on.

“You can always add on your own life experience as a mercenary or all the times we have talked about Imperial tactics and politics in the past,” El had said during a dream in which they had been lying on verdant green grasses, the smaller girl's head placed on Byleth’s lap. “Just of course don’t mention my name and take some books with you to cite from them.” 

A list of titles had followed that advice, one that she was more than thankful for since it pretty much allowed her to feel comfortable in class after a not-so-nice first day. And what was best, that somehow seemed to signal that Edelgard was no longer sad at the fact Byleth wasn’t teaching her class. 

The girl hadn’t taken it that well the moment she told her and the man she called Hubert, her vassal and sworn-protector, who she ended up greeting too cheerfully since she had heard tales about him for years. To say the guy was amused not only at her demeanor, but at how close she and the princess were was an understatement. He had almost shot a very powerful, very annoyed Miasma spell at the professor when she placed a hand on Edelgard’s shoulder and squeezed, even though his light green eyes did note that the usually skittish girl seemed to relish in that touch. 

Once he had been reassured that everything was fine, Byleth set about to talk about her meeting with Rhea and how odd she had thought the archbishop was - a sentiment that apparently pleased El to no end. The part which rubbed her the wrong way was hearing that the former mercenary had been forcefully assigned to the Blue Lions and that Manuela Casagranda, former diva of the Mittelfrank, would still be the Black Eagles’ professor. She had soon let that setback behind though, choosing to focus on how good it was that she would have the woman of her dreams (quite literally) so close to her during the school year. 

She had also left aside the thought which whispered _and all that will come as its end nears_ , since the last thing she wanted was to sour the mood with the inevitability of her war. That would be addressed of course, as even Jeralt had expressed a desire to help for some reason or another. All in due time. After they got to settle in and enjoy the peace that the monastery was offering them after all those years. 

Even though it meant that, due to such circumstances, Byleth would be pitied against Edelgard in the coming mock battle, which meant both had been trying their best to prepare throughout the week too. They would do all in their power to not be defeated by the other and decided to face the ordeal as if it were a normal couple’s fight. 

Hence the professor took her students to the training grounds and hummed in delight at the space at her disposition. Earlier on she had separated eight sets of weapons, one for each pupil, as well as some dummies and targets in different corners. She waved them on towards the stacked weapons the moment they looked at her expectantly, waiting for some order on what to do.

“I’ll let you choose according to preference at first, so gather the weapon you’re mostly familiar with. Later on towards the course, it’d be nice if you changed it up a little and at least considered practicing with something else,” she explained and was relieved when that was received with interested grunts and cheerful nods. “For the mock battle tomorrow, please focus on what you feel better with and I’ll correct your form.”

“Would’ve been better if you’d done this a few days ago instead of only now,” Felix grumbled, selecting a training sword and testing its balancing to see if it was to his liking. “So where do I go from here?” 

She pointed him towards one of the dummies and wasn’t even the slightest bit ruffled by his words. She knew he was more inclined towards the practical aspect of fighting, even though his theory wasn’t as bad as she had thought it would be after just getting to know him. He simply got annoyed beyond reason whenever she started talking about ancient Imperial war tactics, despite the fact that was part of the curriculum and she happened to have a good internal source for those. One that had tipped her on some amazing books about the subject too. 

And hell if she didn’t like reading them until a few minutes before curfew was supposed to start, with Edelgard either sitting beside her or lying on her lap. 

Nah, she wasn’t biased about Imperial warfare at all.

Byleth proceeded to do the same with all the other students and either divide them up for pair practice or have them stand aside and go through a combo she would show them. Soon enough the training grounds became alive with grunts, squeals and the sound of wooden weapons hitting each other. The sun rode in the sky as hours went by and the professor circled them around, stopping once or twice to make corrections and silently congratulate each pupil on something they were doing well. It made her chest feel lighter when that was answered with a cheerful beam, a blush or even a small grunt.

Somehow, she learned more about them in that setting too, in the way they gripped their weapons and brandished them, some more carefully and skilled, others with reverence, and a few with reckless abandon. Some were at home with bows and arrows, others with the lance they had seemed to hold since they were born. The sword appealed to fewer, whereas the axe fit snugly against Dedue’s hands and awkwardly, but still not wrongly, on Annette’s.

For just a second, Byleth saw the girl holding a shining, beautiful golden one while running in her direction, fury and a tinge of sadness in those piercing blue eyes, but once she shook her head and blinked the image was gone. She was simply left with the impression Annie was trying to fulfill a duty or impress someone when that weapon was in her hands, but she felt like it was too early for her to make any comment about it. Later, if perhaps things went as the professor wanted them to and she ended up becoming closer to them, she would inquire after the matter. 

For that day, and since she was indeed planning to crush the Black Eagles and the Golden Deer which had been practicing at the training grounds a lot more through the week, she did mention that Annette should stick to magic instead. The girl smiled in delight and nodded, already calling in a Wind spell to knock an arrow out of Ashe’s bow, then make it travel forward until it hit the target straight on the bullseye. 

She was glad for the change of pace from the seriousness that had taken over her students, as she wished they were as unconcerned and carefree about the entire matter as she was. It would be just a mock battle, that much was clear, but some of her pupils seemed to be taking it as seriously as if their future depended on it.

“Loosen up your shoulders or else it’ll be harder for your lance to hit higher,” she told Dimitri once she stepped between his and Sylvain’s duel. The prince had been dominating it the entire time, but that didn’t mean he was better than his companion, just more focused and faster in a sense. Although he nodded at her and grunted while parrying a downward strike, the next moment she saw him commit the same mistake and lose the possibility to land a stellar move on the redhead’s open guard. 

“Again,” she ordered, but asked the roles to be shifted so Sylvain could get a shot at defending and retaliating. Since there was some trouble there too, she stopped the fight one more time and instructed them, asking for Ingrid to be her opponent since the girl had already mastered that particular combination to perfection. 

Drills like that couldn't take forever, though, and neither did they. Nevertheless, they helped her get a feel of the class and how the eight members of the Blue Lions related to one another, which not only made her able to better pit them some strategies in a big group battle (a practice run of the mock battle) but also on how they should fit in a more cohesive unit for the next day.

Not that she needed to say too much, as her remarks only reflected the natural, organized order in which the students fell almost naturally into. Dimitri, Ingrid and Felix were more than happy to take the vanguard, with Ashe, Annette and Sylvain right behind them. Dedue kept the backline all by himself, whereas Mercedes was often fluttering everywhere, either offering healing or magical support - though Byleth had sensed some sort of ability within the older girl too. It certainly wasn’t towards the swords, as she had almost painfully hit both the professor and Dimitri with it after throwing it around like a dagger, but there was something else for her that wasn’t magically based too. 

They stopped at times for a rest and for lunch. Then the class had to be dismissed thanks to the sun being away, close to setting, changing the luminosity thrown over the grounds. It had been too easy to lose track of time while planning and having fun, or just learning from someone like Byleth, who finally showed why she had been selected in Remire to begin with. Whereas the professor had learned a lot about those kids, they had gained a lot of respect for her and the expertise she had brought to their technique, something that was vastly commented on in hushed tones during dinner.

They had wanted to ask Byleth to accompany them to the Dining Hall, but they were aware that she usually had something to eat in her own quarters instead. They didn’t know why, but then a lot about the woman was a real mystery to them. Like why she was so often seen alongside Edelgard von Hrevelg, the Imperial princess and House Leader to another class that wasn’t her own. There were already stares at their backs whenever they strolled around the monastery, just as they did in that late afternoon and early evening before retiring to Byleth’s room and enjoying as much of their night together as they could. 

“How was your day? Do you really think you can win against the Black Eagles tomorrow?” Edelgard inquired, shyly sitting at the edge of the woman's bed and placing her head on Byleth's shoulder. If there was one thing she had grown to love above everything else was ending her days like that - no matter how chaotic and stressful they had been with assignments, something her classmates had said or done, or one of her… extra duties, it was always relaxing to be close to the professor like that.

El had thought she would have huge reservations about being touched and kissed so often in the real world, even if they had done plenty of that in dreams as their relationship slowly evolved. However, they both found out that given how vivid their past encounters had been, it mostly felt as natural as if they had indeed been doing it for years already. Sure, she was ever so respectful and never one to overstep, actually asking every single day if it was ok for her to take a seat on the mattress and other things like that, but for the princess it was just another form of showing she cherished and respected her partner.

"It was good, they were eager to go to the training grounds all week but it was worth the wait," Byleth retorted, weaving a hand through Edelgard's hair and combing it, an almost unconscious gesture that brought her peace. "And if I _think_ I can beat the Black Eagles tomorrow?" An edge colored her tone, a challenging one that made El beam. "You won't even know what hit you."

"Oh so you will be playing favorites and going straight for me? That will make people wonder, you know." She pulled away to look at the woman, her lilac eyes glinting with anticipation albeit there was some truth in her words. People were already talking, even if all she and the woman did was meander together and talk about subjects - at least while in public. 

"Let them." The shrug which shook Byleth's shoulder was playful, made both of them grin at the prospect. "And well, if they really wanna know, it's a mercenary's tactic to first go after who they've accessed as the most capable enemy."

"Flattery will get you nowhere," Edelgard mumbled, a slight blush dusting her cheeks in the pretty crimson that the professor adored.

They were still having a great time finding out more about each other in the real world, how they reacted to what was said, the cadence of their voices and the feeling of skin against skin. It was amazing how reality could indeed be a thousand times better than dreams, even though those had been good as they were.

Lucky enough they hadn't stopped meeting in dreams either, as at first they had wondered if their connection would break since they were physically close to one another. To see that persisting and, to a point, becoming somehow stronger, was something that made them happy. Whatever time they could spend together was very welcome, be it cuddling, studying or, as they had been doing recently, mock battling before the big event.

"It's not a lie and you know it," Byleth commented, then placed a small peck on the girl's forehead and watched the way she beamed at it. How such a little gesture could make her lighten up in one second. "Are you nervous about tomorrow?"

"Not really. I mean, it will be a good opportunity to see how other classes have been working and what everyone can bring to the table. And if nothing, it will be a good break from routine and from Professor Manuela insisting that I should take magical classes too," she grimaced at the last part, not really wanting to admit how much that pained her. 

"Oh she's still bothering you about it? I can tell her to stop if you want me to." Byleth squeezed her shoulder, then let her hand slide down until it could cradle Edelgard's smaller, gloved one. 

"It's… no problem, really. She means well, but I don't really want to delve into the nature of my powers and all of that." The princess sighed, then looked sideways to the book Byleth had discarded a few minutes ago. She stretched her body in order to grab it, then offered it to the woman beside her. "In any case, I don't want to distract you from your required reading. Would you like me to leave?"

"No, but I do think we should maybe call it an early night. Tomorrow will be a long day and the last thing I want is to keep you from resting. You're welcome to stay though," she added, just in case her words had sounded dismissive. Sometimes she worried if she was communicating clearly, as she had never been one to talk too much to begin with.

Aside from Edelgard, Byleth had grown up without a friend or companion her own age, what with the fact that she had been part of her father's mercenary troop almost from the moment she was born. There was no place for kids there and she was pretty sure she would have been sent away as well if she had had any other family to watch over her back then. That, and her eerie prowess with a sword (later on, with whatever weapon Jeralt managed to put on her little hands) had made her more than own a place at the company, but quickly be turned into an asset everyone relied on.

That didn't mean they became her friends or people she talked to about herself and her feelings, though. Aside from the few times she told Jeralt about Edelgard and what they had been up to in dreams, she usually acted more as a listener than a speaker and expressed herself with as few words as she could. 

What hadn't been a problem with the mercenaries, who had literally watched her grow, was almost a reason for a fallout during her first class. And all because she had been meaning to say they were welcome to interrupt her and ask questions whenever they wanted to, but given her choice of words it sounded just the opposite. 

That was what she worried about, although the princess had never accused her of being a bad speaker and somehow Byleth felt a lot freer to talk to her, in a sense. It didn't mean she wasn't worried about being misunderstood, but still.

In the end they stayed together in silence as Byleth read and Edelgard sat on the desk, got a parchment paper and decided to get started on an essay due two weeks from there. Her dedication was inspiring, until the point that she fell asleep over the table and almost knocked her quill pen to the floor. 

"Hey, you should go to your room then," Byleth crooned as she leaned close to the girl on the table and woke her up as gently as she could. "I'd love to keep you here and just tuck you to bed but yeah, we don't wanna give people more reasons to whisper about us, right?"

"N-no, we don't," Edelgard agreed, her face flushed again by that suggestion and the fact she had just fallen asleep like that.

After some hasty kisses and whispered good nights, plus the "see you soon" that followed since they knew they'd meet in dreams, the princess was gone. Byleth loved her presence, silent when they had other, school-related things to go through. She would love to just stay with Edelgard for as long as she could, but knew it was just a small wish that would never really come true. Given her wandering mind and inability to concentrate on the book she was supposed to be reading, soon enough she blew off the candle she'd kept at the bedside table and went to bed as well.

In one moment she closed her eyes and then the next… she saw herself at a vast green field, the morning sun shining over it in a comfortable way and making the grass look ethereal, gleaming under that light. She was at the lowest point of that area surrounded by rocky mountains, the one where she had been told the mock battle would take place. There were some trees to the right, slopes ahead and to the left, plus some posts which marked where each class would be. 

She had already "studied" that terrain as much as she could, then devised a strategy to win the next day once her class paraded through it. For she knew that was nothing but a dream, since she and Edelgard had been having the same one for about a week as of then. That didn't mean she couldn't take advantage of that little peek into the grounds, though. 

Soon enough, just as it had happened on the other nights, she heard the sound of steps to her right and spun around in time to lift the wooden sword which was already in her hand and block an axe coming down her way. She looked up and beamed, her expression matching the open, playful one on Edelgard's face. 

Thus the battle began in their dreams, punctuated by giggles and chuckles as they missed, lunged forward, tried moves they would never attempt in real life and then fell to the ground panting, hugging each other and dissolving into new laughs once Byleth made the mistake of tickling Edelgard.

To say that was a perfect setting, one of celebration and banter for all they had gone through and the fact that they were now together, was an understatement. Joy and love were etched in their eyes, flowing through them as they glanced at one another, joining them together even before they kissed. 

And as always, even though she wondered if the two women were aware of it, everything was watched by a small, green-haired child who perched on a tree and couldn't help but beam at how soft everything looked. 

* * *

"Told ya she was a good fighter."

Those words were met by a grunt as a sullen Hilda made her way out of the battlefield and got close to a healer, who was responsible for tending to the students. She looked up at Claude, the one who had said that, and shrugged.

"Well, she wasn’t even the one to take me out. But hey, at least this means I won't get to do any more work for today," she said with a small, gloating smile. "I don't understand what's the use of having a mock battle so soon in the school year anyways." She winced once the healer mopped the blood from her forearm - she had thought they would be using white magic for it instead of archaic measures such as water, soap and cloth, to say the least.

Hilda and Claude were the latest, but not the first of the students to be sent to the bench after being deemed as out of the mock battle. The criteria for that as observed by Seteth himself, would be taking what was considered a fatal blow, even if the wooden weapons they were all using weren’t really going to do any damage. Magic users had been asked to tone down their spells and all arrows had been previously blunted, then painted in order to signal where an opponent had been shot. 

That didn’t mean some blows and other mishaps weren’t injuring the students, as it was the case with Hilda. Practice weapons could be proven deadly when someone really knew how to use them - or if they had some sort of abysmal strength behind their moves as well. Which was exactly what had happened to her. 

“It’s probably to make sure no sloths like you ever get the idea that they’ll thrive in Garreg Mach,” he commented, snickering when the pink-haired girl scowled at him. “I mean, now we gotta get ready for the Battle of Eagle and Lion in the middle of the term so yeah.”

They both grimaced when they watched the blur of black and blue that Dimitri had become striking down Raphael as if he were nothing but a large tree in the prince’s way. There was blood on their friend's shoulder, they saw as he strolled out of the battlefield with a sheepish expression on his face. 

“I wish someone would tell him to tone it down,” Hilda commented, annoyed. She had been another of Dimitri’s victims and, as far as she was concerned, his battle tactics were going a bit too overboard. “Like jeez, it’s just a mock battle for crying out loud. Not a war to defend freaking Faerghus or whatever.”

“For someone who always talks about fair fights, this surely does not look like one,” Claude mumbled, voicing his thoughts but not the idea that somehow they should have expected this. As if Dimitri being like that was just normal, in a sense. 

“Ey, sorry I let you down, pal,” Raphael said once he got to the bench and heartily sat down on the floor in order to watch the match. “We have some tough opponents today.”

The Golden Deer did cheer for one second when Annette was hit by an arrow from Bernadetta and was immediately told that she was out, given how her neck was colored black then. It was nice to see other Houses losing some fighters instead of just them, as for a while it did seem like the Blue Lions and the Black Eagles had been going straight for them. 

“No apologies, friend.” Claude slapped Raphael’s healthy shoulder just as another healer sat down to look at the boy. “Least you weren’t taken down by magic, I’m still slightly nauseous by that hit.”

“Wasn’t it Edelgard that got the final shot, though?” Ignatz carefully asked once he approached the benches too, one hand massaging his upper leg since he’d been hit there by Byleth’s sword. He had almost seen himself out of the battlefield once he saw her coming for him up in the forest trees, but stood his ground and tried hitting her before. Not only had she danced away from every arrow with a grace that was inspiring and astonishing, she had been just as elegant and fast while striking him down. “You were close to me and I saw it.”

“Aw man, don’t ruin my cover like that,” the House Leader whined, miffed from being the only one out and pretty much the first to be defeated in a way. “Losing to a real-life princess no less, ugh.”

“I hope you aren’t implying she’s weak because she’s a girl cause - ah, there you go, another one on Her Highness’s account.” Hilda said, menacing at first, until they both saw Edelgard get through Sylvain’s defenses as if they were nothing, her axe striking under the lance and connecting with his chest in full. 

“Hopefully either she or the Teach stop Dimitri from going on,” Claude mused, then sat down beside his friends in order to watch the rest of the mock battle.

The pupils and teachers had marched to that place, a small clearing of sorts in the mountains, a bit early in the day, before the sun could wear them down. Luckily it wasn’t as far away from the monastery as Byleth had thought it to be, but she was already as familiarized with the terrain as the other professors thanks to her lover showing it to her in dreams during all those nights. Hence it came as no surprise when she and the Blue Lions were set on the lower grounds and the other Houses opposed them from the higher ones, the forest offering refuge to the Golden Deer and their arches, the hills allowing the Black Eagles and their mages to have a better view of the field and know where to launch their magic. 

Although she had often joked to Edelgard that she would indeed go for her class first, she did exactly the opposite and eliminated as many of the Golden Deer as she could - she hated the thought of her students getting shot by stray arrows that they hadn’t been able to anticipate. That was the actual strategy they had agreed upon the day before, one that ended up working really well too. 

Though she should have known better not to aim at Lysithea first, Byleth thought as she watched the younger mage fire a particularly powerful spell at Ashe and take him out before he could even get hold of an arrow. The boy had yelped upon the impact of that unknown form of magic and all the strength behind it - Seteth did call her out for it, but the girl’s only response was to look down and apologize, then mostly stay out of the way instead of fighting.

It was almost as if she weren’t able to keep herself in check and tone her powers down, Byleth thought, wondering if that was the case and why a strong intuition told her it was. And she wasn’t the only one, either.

She and a few students were already between the assortment of trees that was comically called a forest, just waiting to ambush their enemies from the Black Eagles and the few remaining Golden Deer still in the field. What with them being on higher ground than before, she was already able to perceive a lot more of the battlefield than she had seen at first. Which meant she was able to turn around just in time to notice what was happening close to the Black Eagles base.

Dimitri was there completely alone, as Ingrid, Sylvain and Felix were busy with their own enemies (Petra, Ferdinand and Leonie, respectively) and in different parts of the field too. There, he was trying to deal with Edelgard while dodging Dorothea’s onslaught of Thunder, something that perhaps would be hard on any other student if… well, if he wasn't so focused on the task at hands that he almost pretended to not mind the magic and simply keep pressing on.

It wasn’t the first time she realized his form was off, completely different from how it had been one day ago back at the training grounds. She had heard the grunts of pain coming from most of the opponents he had defeated and seen the wounds they now sported. It shouldn’t be the case, given how he was indeed brandishing nothing more than a training lance, but still. 

Byleth absentmindedly told Dedue to go help the others win against Professor Hanneman, then decided it would be better for her to intervene before her lover suffered the same fate. She knew she wasn’t supposed to be so blatant about it at all, but the thought of seeing Edelgard hurt by him again-

She cut that thought short once she realized it was the first time that both of them had fought, hence there was no reason for that little speck of intuition to yell at her that he could and would hurt her if he was left to his own devices. She imprinted extra speed to her steps, feeling the rocky ground give underneath her feet and offer her purchase to go on, to get closer and closer to the two that were fighting, red and blue capes flying in the wind generated by their movements and dodges. 

The moment she heard a small grunt of pain coming from Edelgard, she wondered if she were too late. The lance had hit her right on the shoulder, forcing her entire body down with the impact. Instead of giving in and letting herself be put into a position that would make it easy for the prince to overwhelm her, El put one foot back and allowed her weight to be placed there, before rotating her hips forward and adding the momentum she had gained to a side slash with her axe, one that hit an astounded Dimitri on the ribs and pushed him back considerably. 

“This is only a mock battle, Dimitri. Be mindful of that,” the princess mumbled, loud enough for the two of them and Byleth to listen. Though she wondered if she had even been heard, given how glazed over the prince’s eyes seemed to be. In that second she was sure he was fighting someone else, something that wasn’t Edelgard and deserved to be killed beyond all cost. 

A thought that perhaps was a bit too close to the truth due to the fact that, a few seconds later, he was back raining strike upon strike of his lance upon her, trying to find an opening and end that once and for all. She wouldn’t say she was scared, as there was no way something bad would happen and she had faced other opponents throughout her life, but not with eyes like that. Eyes that were lost in another dimension or another time, it seemed. 

However, nothing prepared her for the fact that a sword edged itself between their weapons and forced both of them back to different sides of the field. Her lilac eyes widened once she saw Byleth there, cornflower blue irises quickly running an accessing gaze all over both of them to make sure they were fine. She was equally surprised when the prince turned and almost went for his own professor, then blinked when he seemed to realize exactly who he had been about to hit.

“Dimitri, go cover for Mercedes in the forest. I’ll deal with this one,” Byleth ordered, giving him no room to either apologize or question it by turning to face Edelgard herself, then watched as the girl’s puzzled look gave away to one of challenge. They remained frozen in place though, waiting until they heard sounds of footsteps which signalled that her order had been followed. That was their moment and no one else would ruin it.

The professor started by taking a better grip on her sword and stepping closer to the princess, watching with something like pride when her move was mirrored. After all, she had been one of Edelgard’s first instructors and to this day gave her some pointers from time to time. To see her perception even then, and the fact that she was still up there after facing other students, was already a testament to her improvement.

“Did he hurt you?” Byleth couldn’t help but inquire once they were closer, their weapons a breath away from one another. She didn’t really care that they were enemies and she wasn’t supposed to talk to an enemy, she needed to know if the girl was ok. 

“No, he did not. There is something odd about his demeanor, though - we should talk about this later, I suppose. For now, give me everything you’ve got.” Edelgard smirked, finally breaking that stalemate with a wide swing of her axe to the side.

The move was somewhat slow to Byleth, who was used to parrying swords and other smaller weapons which allowed for quicker strikes. Thus it was easy for her to defend against that and dance away, only to edge closer a second later and aim a slash to the girl’s head. She smiled when it was deflected with the axe instead of a step back, as Edelgard had been more prone to do until Byleth started helping her use her weapon of choice defensively instead of only offensively. 

Soon they fell into a nice, familiar rhythm that lulled them away from that particular mock battle and into several they had already staged in dreams. It was as if no more enemies were there, their grunts and steps muted and faded into a secondary existence, one that wasn’t the little bubble that both women had created. Yes, they were fighting, but they made sure to neither hit the other too hard and even change the course of their weapons last minute as soon as one realized the other wouldn’t be able to parry it. 

It was indeed a dream come true. Their eyes locked, lilac on blue, and stayed like that while they smiled, then giggled, then full on laughed as if the exercise was nothing but the most hilarious joke they had ever witnessed in their lives. By then they were feeling comfortable with each other, the ground underneath them and the sun over their heads mere witnesses to their mirth. Sweat pooled on their clothes and it was getting harder and harder to keep their weapons up, a fact that was noticed and made them chuckle even more. 

As such, they remained blissfully unaware of the fact that after a while, they were almost the only two left on the field apart from Dimitri and Professor Manuela, which were in a match of their own and one that would probably end soon in favor of the prince.

By then their bodies were starting to tire, both attack and defense suffering due to it, and they were getting hit with the stupidest of moves. Byleth laughed a tad too loud when a clumsy down strike actually connected with her shoulders, only for her own side slash to land on Edelgard's open guard. The professor knew she had the advantage with a smaller weapon that allowed her to move faster, even though the practice axe wasn't really that heavy and the speed difference came to milliseconds, given how intricate the princess's footwork was. 

That still gave her some advantage, along with her greater stamina to withstand long combats such as these and the fact she hadn't taken many bruises before fighting her lover. That was why she took on a defensive stance then, mostly dodging hits and attempts at hitting while looking for an opening - something that would neither hurt El too much nor humiliate her in front of their growing audience. 

It happened a few seconds after Dimitri took down Manuela and started rushing towards the princess yet again. Byleth heard his approach and glanced up from her opponent in order to gauge him, her eyes widening when she took in the look etched on his face. The way his eyes had become even more unfocused, the blue almost a tone of silver, his cheeks colorless and stretched in a grin that belonged not in a mock battle, but in a place where many enemies had been killed. 

The shock that ran through her veins at that was an unwanted distraction, especially since she had a strange bout of intuition about Dimitri right then and how he could be a danger to what she loved. That ended up making her open her guard and she grunted in surprise when the axe hit her again, this time on the torso, with enough strength to send her jumping back or else she'd fall. Luckily that brought her back to reality as well, making her glance at the princess in front of her and spin away from another attack, then position herself behind the girl and use the hilt of her sword to hit her back. 

She put more power behind it than she had been using so far, something that surprised Edelgard and made her yelp before stumbling and eventually falling forward. Good, it was what Byleth had wanted from the beginning anyways. That did seem like a bad way to go about winning, but the minute she saw that strange aura around Dimitri, she knew she had to act. Or else he would make it a lot worse if he took it upon himself to take the win for the Blue Lions.

Thus he was forced to do nothing but watch as the professor extended her arm and pressed the point of her wooden sword against the back of Edelgard's neck, rubbing it affectionately as a way to apologize for hurting her earlier. 

"Dead," Byleth said with a smile in her voice that was motivated more by relief from stopping something worse from happening than from the possibility of winning the battle. She crouched and watched as the princess turned to face her, a small beam on her face, then offered her a hand. "You fought really well, El- Edelgard."

"Thank you, professor. I appreciate the opportunity to witness your prowess again," El answered with as much decorum as she could muster, even though her cheeks got the slightest bit flushed at the way that she'd lost and that almost use of her nickname. She accepted the extended hand and was glad when she was not only helped to a standing position, but also dusted off by Byleth.

That was, until they both heard claps coming from the benches and turned to look at too many faces turned their ways. Then and only then did they remember they hadn't been fighting alone and in dreams at all, but were watched by students and professors, plus Seteth, who stammered to announce the Blue Lions as winners and make the request for teachers to gather their pupils so they could return. 

The two women shared a look after those other people turned away to go, which took a while since they were too busy staring at Edelgard and Byleth, measuring them up. Or at Dimitri, shooting him inquisitive or scared glances.

Oh yes, the three of them thought at the same time, for quite different reasons, it would be a _long_ journey back to the monastery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's just too much fun to put Edelgard against Byleth on the mock battle and having them expose their relationship like that xD and this time i wanted to showcase Byleth growing closer to her students, as well as some students getting together on the sidelines too, something that will show up a lot more often in later chapters.
> 
> Rewriting this has been a lot of fun but I really hope you guys are enjoying it, the different pacing and so on. Since we're still in the beginning of this part, those things might not be as noticeable but you'll start seeing more and more of them as it goes on.
> 
> Thanks for reading and have a great weekend!


	3. All that Slithers in the Dark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The students return to Garreg Mach after the mock battle and Byleth gains some insight on what could be troubling Dimitri.
> 
> Later in the day, once she can finally get out of the Dining Hall, she talks to Edelgard about things that have been troubling her.

No one noticed how much time had passed since the start of the mock battle and its end. Surely it had been more than hours, what with every student being on the field and having to be taken out in order for a class to be declared the winner, but even so. It was a shock when they saw the sun beyond its halfway point through the sky, signalling the battle had extended way beyond noon - which would also explain why the students were so hungry and grumpy, eager to get out of the field and back to the monastery.

Perhaps because of that, or just due to how some of them had gotten a bit more hurt than they should during a fight that was supposedly a simulation and not really a combat, there was a lot of whispering and staring going around. 

And most of that, as it was to be expected in a sense, was completely directed at Dimitri. 

The students were divided between their classes, with their respective professors marching in front of them. The distance kept between the Houses didn't stop the Golden Deer from turning their heads and glaring at the prince every so often, or the Black Eagles to do it when they thought Dimitri wouldn't notice. The same could be said of his classmates, who weren't really celebrating as much as people expected them to and mostly kept their distance, throwing their House Leader long, accessing stares every now and then. 

The only one to walk beside Dimitri was Byleth, her face neutral and more interested in looking at the landscape sprawling in front of them than at the other students. The vast green fields and the stretch of blue sky above them, impossible to see at times due to the mountain peaks which rose to their left and right, was a better distraction than taking stock of what was going on around her - and the fact that she herself was another target of those eyes. 

She and a certain Imperial princess that meandered alongside Manuela, who kept a hand on her shoulder and alternated between congratulating the girl and speaking things that made Edelgard tense. It didn't take a genius to guess what was being said, especially since the songstress wasn't the most discreet person in the world and kept turning sideways to wink at Byleth too. 

She didn't know how to feel about the entire thing, even though there was some guilt at the thought she could have just compromised both her and Edelgard in front of the entire school - in front of Seteth, no less. Although they had never spoken about whether or not to keep their relationship secret, it surely would be wrong to just shout about it from the top of the Cathedral when the two of them had supposedly just met, right? 

And what with Edelgard's talk of a war coming, well, the one thing she should do was not raise attention to her lover, or to the fact that they were indeed allies in that.

That was also a fact that had been scarcely discussed and only during dreams, since they were both a bit reluctant to talk about it while awake. The only detail Byleth knew was that Edelgard would soon become Emperor and as such, she wanted to use her position to bring about a better world. One where everybody had equal opportunities regardless of their place of birth and if they had a crest.

The world had already missed on too many talented people that weren't seen as important because of their lack of a crest, she would say. That could no longer be true - and the fact that she had been experimented on as a kid just so she could become a weapon, having more than one of those accursed crests, did add to her hatred of that and everything else that kept the system in place. Hence she had to destroy the church of Seiros and all of its lies in order to save humanity from those shackles. 

While that had been all well and good on Byleth's mind before they had met, she had found herself not even wanting to think about the entire ordeal after they hugged and kissed in real life. Granted, what with her becoming a professor and all the overwhelming sensations of meeting the girl she had been seeing in dreams for all this time, the issue had slipped her mind. The thing was, they would really have to talk about it and soon. 

She wanted to help, she wanted to be able to keep the girl safe. She wanted to be useful, in a way that she had failed to be so many years ago when the experiments took place. As if to atone for her earlier lack of action, in a way. Thus as she watched Edelgard and Manuela conversing about whatever it was that made them laugh, she noticed how good it was to see the young princess so carefree, making a mental note to discuss that. It would be only a matter of time until they had to, anyways. 

"Is everything ok, professor? You haven't said a word after the battle was won."

The deep, equally ungrounded voice which sounded beside her made Byleth shake her head and turn to meet Dimitri's dull, hazy blue eyes. Despite his attempt to hide what he was really feeling in that moment, she was able to clearly read the sheepishness and sadness there, some guilt as well as underlying, unexplainable anger. At what, she didn't know, but in a sense she was sure it wasn't at the mock battle per se. 

_ “This one surely has something about him, doesn’t he?”  _ The voice that at times piped up and had a snarky comment or two to make about whatever was going on returned. Sothis had been gone for a while, but in a sense it was as if she was always with Byleth too. Sometimes she would get a feeling rather than a sentence said out loud, but she knew those weren’t her own and were related to that child instead.  _ “The way he went about this little exercise was way too much.” _

Byleth had to agree with that, pursing her lips thoughtfully. That didn't mean she shouldn't try to help him, though, especially when so many glares were on him and so many mouths seemed to be whispering his name. She had seen that same expression he was doing before too, in the face of someone she loved. "I was wondering about the battle, on how to better help you. You did wonderfully out there, in any case," she commented at last, trying to offer him a smile.

"You are kind, but there is no need for such words," Dimitri deflected, his gaze lowering again to the ground as if the grass was the most interesting thing in the world. 

“I won’t press,” Byleth automatically conceded. Doing so would get them nowhere and more than likely would result in him putting up walls. “But if you need anyone to talk to, I’m here.”

Perhaps it was the fact that it was still too recent, as he had felt that sensation throughout the entire mock battle and they had been going back to the monastery for just a few minutes. A few long, excruciating minutes feeling the gazes and words of others burning holes in his back. In any case, before he could notice it he saw himself whispering something he had never admitted to others, not even to his closest friends:

“It is hard to explain, professor, but sometimes in the middle of a fight I feel like I am back in… a particularly painful, awful period of my life.” He stopped, sighed and finally met her gaze, shocked at how light, unjudging and supportive it was. He had expected her to shrug it aside and say he was overcomplicating things, just the way he had always presumed others would react if he were to tell that tale.

Not that he ever did - the ones who had been with him before the Officers Academy had gone through the same thing and had their own ghosts to deal with. He had always seen it as unbecoming if he were to pour his own woes over those of others who were more than likely suffering as well. 

“I hear their voices and their screams, sometimes. Almost as if I was there again, even if right now I’m -” he shook his head, mentally rebuking himself for going into that part of his experiences. He was supposed to be happy, to be celebrating the fact that the Blue Lions had won the mock battle. Yet all he could do was mourn, his eyes far away, chained to debris of a past that couldn’t be changed no matter what he did. 

Meanwhile, Byleth did her best to keep a neutral expression, despite her being awed at how similar his words were to when Edelgard spoke of her own past, of the time she was incarcerated and experimented upon - even more so when she spoke of her siblings and their pleas for everything to stop. The two were talking about different experiences, right? Even though his words were so familiar, since she had heard something like that coming from the girl she loved, there was no way he, too, had been a test subject.

“And even if I’m not in that place, in that battle anymore, there are times when the memories seem to become reality. I hear the weapons clinging, the yells of pain, bodies falling to the ground. Even if no one gets seriously hurt in the fight I'm in, sometimes it is enough to send me back.” His conclusion was abrupt and not very telling, but it was enough to make Byleth believe that no, Dimitri and Edelgard weren’t referring to the same type of traumatic event.

Were their scars similar in nature, although they were made by different kinds of blades and weapons?

In any case, there was something else in his past that was keeping him chained there, a fact that he seemed to have knowledge of. What he didn’t really know was how to break free of it, if she was reading that correctly. “I understand,” she whispered; and she did.

At times it was hard to forget those days in which her existence was narrowed down to her missions, to making sure their opponents didn’t get the upper hand and were properly dealt with. The Ashen Demon, although not a strong presence ever since her dreams with Edelgard began, was still there and sometimes it felt like it was just lurking, waiting.

For what, she didn’t really know.

“You don’t have to tell me if it hurts you so,” she added, placing a tentative hand on his shoulder just as she usually did when El was wrapped in particularly painful memories. “But if it helps in any form, you’re more than all of this, Dimitri. I saw the way you dulled your moves when battling Professor Manuela and I know you didn’t mean to hurt the others. If you’re not going to recognize your effort on that, I will.

“Just one more thing. Whatever the situation was, you have to let these ghosts go. You’ll only keep that terrible thing alive inside of you if you don’t.” That was something she usually said to the princess, too, and she hoped that it was useful and not a bunch of pointless words. If she had gotten a proper read on what was going on, then maybe she hadn’t said something stupid. 

She hoped so, and that the derisive grunt they both got from Felix, who was pacing behind them, wasn’t meant at what she said at all. 

“I- thank you, truly,” Dimitri mumbled, unsure about how to respond. He knew ways to counter her arguments about his performance in the mock battle, but decided it was better to accept the easy way out and simply grace his professor with a kind smile. She was trying, he knew, and that was more than he could say about many people who had thought it better to either not address the issue or just pat his head, offering no solace aside from that. 

Besides, that was a far cry from his initial opinion of her as an emotionless, very capable fighter who would shape them to be great soldiers without a car for who they were as people. He had noticed smaller things throughout the week that hinted otherwise, but he knew better than to disregard first impressions. That though, that was reaching out and taking an extra step. One that he was actually grateful for and kept pondering about as they made their way back to Garreg Mach and into the Dining Hall for a small celebration in the name of the Blue Lions house. 

* * *

It had been an uneventful rest of the day following that; even the so-called celebration wasn’t much to talk about and simply consisted of getting food and some extra desserts that the kitchen crew was kind enough to prepare for the worn out students. There was some conversation thrown around, most of it gossip and considerations about the fight at large - and how Seteth had gotten the hell out of sight one second after arriving in the monastery again. 

Of course, the minute someone started talking highlights of the match, all attention fell upon Edelgard and Byleth. Luckily they had already taken the hint from the comments they had heard here and there about them during the walk back to Garreg Mach and sat tables away from one another, even if they wished it didn’t have to be like that. It didn’t stop the rumors, though, nor the glances that kept darting between them, or the mumbled words that accompanied such pervasive, prodding stares. 

They both knew it would be pointless and potentially harmful to retort, to acknowledge them in order to tell those people to quit it. Sure, Edelgard did send her own classmates scathing looks that made them stop as soon as they sat down with some food, but that was mostly it. She had no power over those from other Houses and Byleth was no good at containing the Blue Lions, who were either excited at a victory they hadn’t expected or weary about many things, especially their own professor and House Leader. 

In the end Edelgard feigned being bored and in a hurry to complete another task, excusing herself to go to her room and spend some time in quiet, away from those accusing eyes that were boring holes on her back. She spared no one a glance, even though she knew most of the Dining Hall had turned to watch her for some reason, and made a point to look away from Byleth even though the woman was sitting the closest to the back door, the one which led to the lake. 

Unfortunately the former mercenary didn’t have the same idea and did indeed glance at the princess as she passed; for a second they were able to exchange a look, one that silently spoke of caution and meeting later on, when the setting was clear and no one would judge them like that. It made both of them smile, the wordless communication something that lifted their souls and spoke of their bond, of the language they had developed for so many years in dreams. 

No matter how much they wanted to spend some time together, as there were no classes at all and most of their assignments had already been dealt with, both kept away due to how the students and teachers alike had acted around them during the meal. That was reinforced the moment Hubert came into Edelgard’s room and inquired about the nature of her exchange with Byleth, about their laugher and carefreeness in the mock battle, then proceeded to warn her about the fact that he had been questioned about the princess’s, ahem, relationship status and whether that involved the mercenary or not. 

That brought on a literal headache, one that El knew had been expected but annoyed her all the same. The only thing she had done was laugh alongside a fellow fighter, how was that a sign of anything? She ended up telling Hubert that she was only glad to learn from the best since Byleth had given her some amazing pointers during the mock battle, literally demonstrating what she meant on the spot.

She knew her vassal better to even entertain the thought he had bought it, but at least was sure he understood that was the answer he was supposed to give whenever someone pressed him too much. At least it was what she would say, and now they would have the same story going. The glint in his light green eyes when he excused himself and left showed some idle curiosity that was at odds with his usual approach to his task of protecting her, though she wondered if Hubert wasn’t just worried about how trustworthy the professor was.

If only he knew, the princess had thought before turning back to the letters and reports he had just handed to her, sighing and rolling her eyes at a particular one. Again, that was something she should have expected sooner or later, but didn’t want to deal with in any case. Although that solved nothing, she pushed the request for a meeting back under the pile of paper on her hands and addressed the next, a response to a warning she had sent as of recent. 

Her eyes were drooping and she was about to fall asleep on the desk when there was a knock on the door, making her yelp and jump to attention at the same time. She ogled the door for a few seconds since she wasn’t expecting anyone and didn’t think she wanted any interruption, then sighed and got to her feet when more incessant rapping came. That surely wasn’t Hubert, he would have gotten the hint that she didn’t want to be disturbed and left without insisting. 

“Let me in before someone sees me,” the request, as well as the one waiting outside, took Edelgard aback so that she spent a few seconds staring at awe at that person, before almost being forced to step aside or running the risk of getting tackled. 

“What are you doing here?” The princess said in an astonished voice, a smile tugging on her lips as she closed the door and turned to stare at Byleth, who was beaming and looking at the room around her.

“I wanted to see you after that fight, but people kept me there for a long time and, you know, they were staring too much at us for no reason,” the professor retorted, noticing how tidy and clean everything was. Not that she had expected any different from the girl she loved but the contrast with her own quarters was just a bit jarring. “You wouldn’t believe how many times I was asked if we were together.”

“Hubert said something of the sorts,” Edelgard mused, carefully getting closer to the center of the room and the woman as well. She tentatively rose her hand and took hold of Byleth’s, twining their fingers together as well. “All because we were having fun at the mock battle, as if that was completely unheard of."

The woman chuckled, squeezing the small, gloved fingers between her own. Still panting from the way she had run to those quarters, Byleth leaned in and quickly pecked her lover on the lips. The sensation was still so new, she kept doing it while talking. “There was... something about the way we say good morning… and how you seem to have too many questions for me." There she stopped, taking in the dust of crimson on Edelgard's cheeks and her small giggles of appreciation. "Even Manuela complained that you ask me more stuff than you ever do in class.” 

It was El's time to get closer to the woman and carefully kiss her cheek too. “Well, if only she didn’t keep pushing the issue about me learning magic in every imaginable way, then… Ah, it doesn’t really matter,” the princess added the moment she saw the former mercenary grimacing. “I am glad you are here, then. And hm, if you don’t mind, can we talk about something other than all that gossip?”

Byleth was keen to nod along, to notice how the subject was a sore spot in some way, in how it hinted at them needing to be a bit more apart. “I do think we have to be more careful, but… of course, El.” The nickname made them both smile, as it always did. “Have you really spent your afternoon getting tasks done with? After a mock battle?”

Edelgard snickered at the jesting, accusatory tone, trying to forget that note about them having to do things differently, then turned to guide them towards the bed after a second of hesitation. Although they had slept in the same bed the night they met, she was still a bit tentative about keeping that going and would often steer away from mattresses unless she was invited to sit down on it. It was the first time she took the initiative and actually motioned for the woman to do the same. 

“Well yes, in a sense,” the girl replied a second later, unsure about how to go about that particular business. “I got some replies and reports about, hm, Imperial matters, if we can call them that.” It was the first time they were discussing war at the open, in the real world. There was a queasy feeling on the pit of Edelgard’s stomach for some reason, but she pushed it aside and kept on going. “Those people, the ones Hubert calls Those Who Slither in the Dark, said they have something of importance to discuss with me in a few days. They shall come dressed as merchants and relay the latest development of some weapon or another.”

_ Those Who Slither in the Dark.  _ Byleth knew exactly who she was referring to, her eyes narrowing into a frown at their mere mention and the small hairs in the back of her arms rising in anticipation. It wasn’t always that they were mentioned, mostly due to how much they were despised and their presence in Imperial lands was enough to make the princess’s heart clench in sadness. The fact that her face was downcast and pale was enough to state that fact, too. 

As for herself, the former mercenary experienced a mixture of feelings at that. Yes, she was well aware that those who had harmed her lover would be some sort of asset in their war, as their resources were useful and would add considerable strength to the future Emperor. She had seen the tears glistening on Edelgard’s eyes when they talked about it many years ago, on the day they had made their intentions well known to her, and on how she had almost been threatened into accepting that deal or else condemn Enbarr - no, the entire Adrestian Empire - to burn in the wake of their destruction. 

However, it was one thing for her to hear about that, about them and their influence over Imperial matters years after being responsible for the murder of ten kids and the Emperor’s weakened state, and another to actually be looking at the girl who had gone through so much in their hands and was still being used by them as a pawn. The fact that Byleth could finally do something about that burned in her mind and chest, made her pull Edelgard closer as if that gesture alone would be enough to keep her safe from then on.

It wasn’t as if the guilt of her past failure didn’t haunt Byleth to that day.

“When and where will this meeting take place exactly?” The woman mumbled against the princess’s hair, her hand lodging itself securely on the small of her back.

“In about two days, probably in my room. We still have to work out some details and it is best if I am not seen with merchants or something of the sorts,” El replied in an absent-minded way, as if the prospect of seeing them wasn’t already filling her with dread. A feeling that, she assumed, was echoed on Byleth’s mind. “Why do you ask, By?” She caressed the professor’s shoulders, noting how unusually tense they were. 

“I’d like to come along, if you wouldn’t mind,” Byleth spoke slowly once she had pulled away, tentative, even more so when she realized the hand she had been holding tensed on her own. “You have no idea how long I’ve waited to see and punch them, El.”

It was a thought they shared, of course. Edelgard had never wanted anything to do with them, even more so after the mess they had created at the Imperial Palace and continued to do to that day. But it was one thing for her to wish for an outcome and another altogether for that to come true, as she had learned in the worst possible way.

Willing her siblings and father to remain safe had resulted in nothing, after all.

At first Edelgard didn’t know how to react and used a few seconds to cosset Byleth’s arm, distracting both of them by how soft that touch was. It had felt like that in dreams, surely, but reality was yet again proving itself to be better in many ways. 

Well, not so much about that one issue, though. “No, I- I don’t think you should be there.” The answer was said in the usual commanding tone that the House Leader was used to applying when dealing with her classmates. Since that was met with a piercing silence unlike any other that had ever been between them, she pressed on: “I don’t see how this would be beneficial for any of us.”

“I don’t see how you meeting them on your own now that I’m here is beneficial, too,” Byleth retorted in a split second, her face unusually stoic and her eyes cold, calculating. It was a far cry from what Edelgard was used to seeing reflected in her face. “You don’t have to deal with them on your own anymore.”

“I- I am grateful that you would like to help, Byleth. Truly I am, please don’t take this the wrong way,” the princess answered, trying to backtrack before they could have a full on argument so soon after they had actually met. And all because of the slithers, no less. “However, I don’t want them to know about your existence, or to even wonder how important you are to me.”

That was a surprise, in a sense. As a mercenary and a good one at that, Byleth was used to protecting and standing in the line of fire as if that was just the natural place for her to be. To hear Edelgard suggest that she, too, wanted to keep her safe made something warm stir in her chest.

If it wasn’t for the fact that she was on edge about that meeting, she would have smiled and thanked her to say the least. They had a more pressing issue to solve first, though. “I did say I was going to assist you with the war, remember? It’s a promise I intend to keep,” the professor said, unconsciously withdrawing her hands and looking at those troubled, divided lilac irises which were slowly turning into a more thoughtful, pained tone of dark purple. She had seen it before, whenever that matter was discussed. 

“And again, I thank you for actually meaning what you said back there. That doesn’t change my answer, though. I cannot expose you to them - and yes, I know you worry about my safety when they are concerned, but it would be illogical of them to do anything at all to harm me now,” Edelgard countered before Byleth could even voice her wish to protect her. It was something they had talked about over and over in dreams, when they were far apart.

Whenever the princess had had any trouble related to the slithers - which was frequent given the fact that they had practically taken over the Enbarr Palace and stayed there for years - Byleth would soothe her by talking about how, together, they would make them pay for all that they had done. She would conjure the craziest scenarios and crack jokes about beating them to death using a swordfish until El smiled and relented a little bit. As a result, they had literally grown up on all those fantasies about how to end these people who had tormented the Imperial family like that. So it was a shock when that stopped being a possibility until the war was over.

The woman had thought hearing that the slithers had been turned into Edelgard’s temporary allies was the worst thing ever, even more so when she had seen how torn the princess was about the entire thing. However, being face to face with the same girl and being denied an opportunity to keep her safe and actually not hit those people as she had longed to do for so long was even worse. 

“I’m not willing to bet your life on it,” Byleth answered, her stable voice betraying the slightest hints of anger behind them. 

“There is no risk for me, I’m sure of it. There would be all the risk in the world to  _ you _ , though, if you were to recklessly expose yourself like that,” Edelgard countered, passionate, firmly standing her ground. 

“I’m well capable of keeping myself safe. And doing the same to you, too.” The professor rose to her feet and paced away from the bed, making a circular path in the center of the room. 

Her mind was burning with questions and possible ways to make the princess see her point, though she knew that wouldn't be the case anyways. She disliked that the first time they had a fallout of sorts it wasn’t even about them, but about outsiders. About people who would be better off dead. 

“I- I am not doubting your abilities, far from it,” Edelgard jumped to her feet as well, her eyes downcast. “But don’t you see? If they ever take an interest in you, in how good of a fighter you are and in what an asset you can be to the war… Byleth, you were unfortunate enough to see the extent they went in order to shape me into their perfect Emperor.” She motioned to herself, to her own body, her hasty movements betraying some hatred at what she had become. “I will never allow them to do the same to someone I love.”

The professor stopped, stared. Now that was an answer she hadn’t expected, the fiery passion in her lover’s eyes at odds with her pale cheeks and the quiet tone to her voice. In the end, she realized that their motives were the same, even if they had different approaches to that. Both wanted nothing more to protect the person they loved.

“As you wish. I won’t press the issue any further, at least not now,” the professor conceded, stepping closer to her and curiously watching as those lilac eyes widened in surprise. “I don’t wanna fight with you, little princess. Even more so if it’s over them.”

It had been a while since that nickname was used, making Edelgard’s tense demeanor ease up even if only a bit. She knew the issue was far from over and wouldn’t really be a moot point between them for a while, but she was glad they weren’t screaming at each other about it.

“We shall talk more about this once the war draws near. Your expertise on the battlefield will be much appreciated, but indeed I still wish to keep you as far away from them as possible,” the girl concluded, then sighed and grabbed one of the professor's hands. “Thanks for wanting to be there with me, though. It means a lot."

They stayed in silence for a few heartbeats, soon going back to sitting down on the mattress. It wasn't lost on Edelgard that Byleth was a bit less present in a sense, wrapped in too many thoughts, body stiff against hers. After a while the princess inquired over her own afternoon, realizing the issue of that meeting had monopolized the conversation for too long already. It wasn't as if she wanted to spend her moments with Byleth talking politics, at least not then. They could allow themselves to be selfish for a while, right? They had finally found each other after all.

Byleth went back to her habit of combing Edelgard’s hair in order to calm herself before answering. “Oh, you know, the students didn’t let me get out of the Dining Hall too soon. And there were so many questions aimed at me, it was something else.” Although she chuckled at retelling the experience, there was an edge to her voice that wasn’t lost on her lover either. “It was almost as if they wanted to know my entire life and write a book about it. Thing is, well, I don’t remember much.”

The princess nodded, bringing the woman closer for comfort alone. “So you have told me at times, that your memories of those early years are hazy at best.”

“Until I met you,” Byleth added, for the hundredth time wondering if those two things could be connected in any way. “And even so, it’s still very clouded. It was even worse when they asked about Jeralt and told me about him being an icon as a Knight of Seiros.”

“Something you knew nothing about until we commented the other day, is it not?” The princess queried and grimaced once that was received with a nod. “I’m sorry, had I known that was actually the case I wouldn’t have mentioned it at the slightest, or talked about it earlier with you. But then, I wasn’t sure if the Jeralt you spoke about was actually  _ the  _ Captain Jeralt to begin with.”

The former mercenary shook her head, quick to deny that. “No, it was good that you said it. If not for you, then maybe I would never hear the first thing about it. Jeralt is very quiet about our past, even more so when it comes to his. Thing is, I have a feeling his connection to Rhea might be important, in some way.”

That piqued Edelgard’s interest, making her pull away and frown, wondering about it. “Surely it is something to think about, isn’t it? He was one of the esteemed Knights of Seiros and more than likely in direct contact with the archbishop. How does one simply give up a position like that and why? I assume Rhea doesn’t take lightly to people running away from her services.”

“Yeah, that makes no sense. Also there’s the fact she just welcomed him back, so it isn’t as if he retired or something, right?” Byleth pondered, a headache starting just as it always did when she tried dissecting that first meeting with the archbishop and how weird it had made her feel. “I have to talk to him about it, I guess. I wanted to during the week but there was never time and he’s usually gone when I’m out of class.”

“I think that I’ve heard something about the Knights of Seiros being sent to deal with bandits around the mountains, but that is only a rumor.” The princess sighed, intrigued. She remembered being mad at how the girl visiting her in dreams knew almost nothing about her own origins, thinking young Byleth was either being mysterious on purpose or that she was unworthy of her trust. “Do you wish to go and talk to him now? Mostly the Knights are kept in before Sunday, so they can take part in services and so on. Also, it is quite late and I don’t want you running into trouble while getting back to your quarters. The last thing we want is to give people more things to dissect about us.”

That made Byleth wince, even though there was a smile on her face. “Yeah, I should get going,” she admitted, springing to her feet in a small, languid movement that betrayed her unwillingness to do so.

“I’ll see you soon?” The woman asked once they hugged, leaned closer before the girl could reply and kissed her right on the lips. 

What was small and chaste at first evolved into the same type of kiss they had shared the first time they met in the real world, lips crushing and opening, taking and giving, heat permeating through them and surprising both girls with how soft the entire moment was. They didn’t want to have to part, to put space between them only because others were watching and commenting, making assumptions and judging them from afar. 

But for that not to happen, they would indeed have to be careful of how they behaved when together in public - or maybe to not be so together in public to begin with. That made the kiss even more precious in a sense, as it was the one moment in which they could fully be themselves. 

They pulled away only a few centimeters in order to take a deep breath, then touched foreheads and looked at one another’s eyes, their silly grins a mere reminder of what had just occurred. It was still a delight to taste, feel and experience so much in the waking world, something that made their senses tingle with how right that was.

“I shall see you soon indeed. Have a safe trip and please let me know if you do get to talk to your father,” Edelgard mumbled, well-aware of how flushed her cheeks were and how her eyes were shining - the same light, the same love, was also etched in Byleth’s irises after all. 

“Sure and hey, don’t take too long with those tasks. It was a tiresome day and you deserve to rest,” Byleth answered, taking slow steps towards the room door and listening to the outside. It would be the cherry on the cake if she just happened to be seen walking out of the Imperial princess’s room close to curfew, after what happened at the mock battle no less. “Oh also, you did amazing at the battle. You almost had me at times.”

El rolled her eyes at that, knowing full well it was a lie. “Yes, my teacher, in the same way that Ferdinand is great with magic and Dimitri’s favorite weapon is a bow.”

That had the desired effect of making Byleth laugh - and the surprising one of having her close the distance between them again for a quick peck on the lips before she was actually out, into that chilly, starless night in the Garreg Mach monastery.

Luckily the little hallway where the second floor dormitories stood was empty, already lit by candles and torches instead of natural light spilling from the windows. Byleth didn't really see the time passing during that day after the mock battle was done, partially because she had been too busy answering the students' queries about her life (sometimes her  _ love life,  _ which she would just reply to with a silent shrug) and tasting all the food they asked her to.

It was strange how welcome she had felt right there and then, how even the other professors had doted on her, commenting on her battle skills and asking questions of their own about her motivations and dreams for the future - only to make her uncomfortably realize she had none. 

Well sure, now she had a war to look forward to and pupils to teach. But before, when she was growing, did she ever envision anything for herself? As she descended the stairs, took a right turn into the empty, darkened greenhouse and the lake, she looked up at the clouded sky and realized that the answer to that was a big no. 

Something that had never bothered her before, but apparently was at odds with everyone else around her now. Even if they welcomed her, talked to her and seemed to want to get to know her better, it was as if there was a barrier between her and them. 

_ "Hey, you were pretty much at your father's beck and call ever since you were born. It's normal to not have any dreams of your own when your future was kind of mapped out for you,"  _ Sothis said in a quiet, gentle voice, an unfamiliar tone since she was usually keen on making fun of most things.  _ "What, I can be serious too. You're too disrespectful sometimes, sheesh." _

Byleth shook her head and chuckled at that last part.  _ "It wasn't like that, though. Jeralt never told me to do anything. I just followed along because… because."  _ Even she had no answer or reason as to why she had become a mercenary in the past, when she was a child.

She wanted to say she had had a choice. She wanted to say she still did, and could forge a future of her own if she chose to. Yet something else, an intuition akin to what she had felt while walking in the monastery grounds by herself and with her mind unfocused, made her stop and remain quiet. As if those would be lies the moment they were spoken or thought aloud. 

As if for the longest time, or in other times, it had not been the case. 

Maybe it was the chilly night or the fact that the Entrance Hall and the Reception Hall that followed were equally empty and silent, used as she was to them being loud and crowded, but an ominous sensation ran its way down her spine. Sure, it wasn't the first time she had experienced it, or caught herself wondering why Garreg Mach felt like the opposite of what holy grounds should. And every time she felt that, it shocked her anew with its intensity.

It was equally saddening to reach Jeralt's office and find it empty, once she had climbed the stairs and avoided the Audience Chamber altogether. Surely it was empty by then, but she would rather keep as far away from the archbishop as she could. Perhaps Rhea was what felt so ominous in the entire monastery, or she had listened too much to Mercedes's stories about the ghosts that haunted the grounds. In any case, she silently went to her room while making a vow to talk to her father as soon as she could - and ask him to elaborate on why his words about Rhea had felt so threatening back then.

* * *

A few hours back, when most of the staff and students of the Officers Academy were still engaging in idle chit chat and eating at the Dining Halls, a stern Seteth called for a private meeting with Lady Rhea in the Audience Chamber.

The sun was making its way towards the horizon and soon it would be dark. It felt like the most opportune time to make that call and to get his report done, before the archbishop had to retire for the night and to make preparations for the following day, the services which would be held at the cathedral. 

He bowed once she joined him, as ever regal in her archbishop regalia. A position she had kept for too long, despite changing names and sometimes going for a slumber and leaving such matters to him. 

"I was not expecting a call from you until later today or earlier tomorrow," Rhea said, voice soft and uninterested as she walked to the stony throne on the end of the chamber and sat down.

"Apologies, then. I hope I'm not interrupting anything important." His tone mirrored hers, but he had never been able to pull such a facade as well as she had. Nor had anyone ever looked so strikingly a resemblance of their Mother sitting on a stone throne, as she was right then.

"By no means." Her eyes, distant and unfocused, keen to analyze and reminisce on a distant past, told another story. Yet given how veiled the emerald on them was, Seteth was sure he'd get nothing out of her if he were to ask. "Are you here to give me the report I required of you?"

"Ah yes, Lady Rhea, indeed. The mock battle was won in favor of the Blue Lions, mostly due to Dimitri's incredible strength and the professor's guidance, as well as for her expertise on the battlefield."

She chuckled at how robotic his voice became, then finally turned to glance at him and not at the room around them. There was something bothering him, she knew. "Do you finally agree with my decision to hire her as a professor, then?"

Had anyone else other than Seteth given the rest of the report, at this point they would have smirked in victory before saying: "No, I do not." His tone was the opposite of it though, laden with a worry that wasn't uncommon, but at the same time unwelcome. "That woman and the future Emperor committed a great breach of decorum and started laughing during the mock battle. Laughing, of all things! And while being enemies too."

"The future Emperor… Edelgard von Hresvelg, is that not?" Rhea hadn't paid much attention to the girl since the beginning of the year, truth be told. She did remember a speck of unnatural silver hair and pointed, defying lilac eyes scrutinizing her with undeniable flames hidden behind a cool, polite smile whenever they ran into one another. "They were fighting, Seteth. I do not see any cause for concern. You can get some entertainment out of defeating a powerful foe."

"But not by the way they behaved. I suppose it's hard for you to grasp it since you weren't there, but that was too… intimate for a student and a professor," the man argued, his heart sinking as he noticed the disinterest Rhea had towards most things nowadays. He knew he'd not be able to sway her with words, no matter how hard he tried. 

"Is that so? That could be simply your conjecture, brother. It wouldn't be the first time you needlessly read too much into a situation." She had no longer the time nor the patience to deal with his paranoias, not then. Not when something more important could be happening under his very nose. "Did anything else worth noticing occur or are we done?"

Seteth sighed, defeated. "Nothing apart from those things. Also, there has been an increase in bandit activity around the region as well. I just thought you might want to take a look at that,” he reminded her, half astounded at that and half worried at Rhea's demeanor. 

It hadn't always been like that, he mused after being dismissed and making his way back to his quarters. She hadn't been so adverse to matters and to the actual running of the Officers Academy. Once upon a time, that had been her greatest priority, after all, so what had changed?

He was long gone with orders to watch over the professor and the Hresvelg girl, then gather more information about the bandits, when back at the Audience Chamber Rhea ran her hands over the stone throne, pensive in the chilly silence, and uttered: "could it be that you are actually the one that was taken from me?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter had two different versions, especially when it came to the girls fighting. Yes, sometimes fallouts can get gruesome and ugly, but somehow it didn't seem like it would be the case with Edelgard and Byleth, or not for that reason at the very least. Even more so since they have been together in dreams for a while prior to meeting irl, so having them "compromise", in a sense, felt more like the way to go. 
> 
> In any case, rewriting this has been fun and there are some minor changes here that'll be important later on too. I hope you've enjoyed it and have a great weekend, guys!


	4. First Sights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a rather nondescript month, Byleth leads the Blue Lions into their first field mission as members of the Officers Academy, pursuing bandits in Zanado, the Red Canyon.
> 
> Strange things happen not only during the battle, but afterwards as well.

It was interesting how time seemed to speed up and slow down in its own volition, with ebbs and flows that had nothing to do with time itself and everything to do with how humans perceived it. As it was the case, Byleth hadn’t even seen the last weeks go by, focused as she was on getting through the next class, the next assignments to be corrected and to be passed to her students, the next occasion when she and Edelgard would be together.

Through the stream of days that had almost run together with their sameness and few things here and there to tell them apart, the professor could remember very clearly the way that archbishop Rhea had gone into her class in one certain morning, before she could even start her lecture on modern warfare and Imperial tactics that had survived the test of time. 

The students had risen and bowed to Rhea, with the same and even extra deference that they showed her, and Mercedes had motioned for Byleth to do the same (which she did in a halfhearted way that elicited some giggles from Sylvain and some others). That was when the archbishop had informed the class that the small, rudimentary villages around the Oghma mountains had been seeing an increase in bandit activity and they would be responsible for disposing of them. 

“Disposing of… as in, killing?” Ashe had inquired, his face surprised and not at all pleased with the task..

His doubt was echoed in Byleth’s head, even more so when the woman in front of her nodded and went on to describe that it was the church’s duty to provide safety for those who needed it, especially in the face of adversities like that. Stealing was not only against human law, but also seen as a crime in Divine Scripture and as such, the perpetrators must be stopped and punished in every appropriate way. 

Lady Rhea had left soon after those words were uttered, yet no one missed the way she had spoken mostly to Byleth all through that exchange, when answering their questions about both the missions and her presence in the coming services. About the latter, the archbishop assured them she was looking forward to changing the way things were done around the monastery, meaning that she would start wandering through the grounds and they were more than welcome to talk to her about anything, whenever they wanted to. 

Byleth watched a mixture of doubt and something like disbelief in her pupils’ eyes and was surprised that it had been their response. One would think that a religious figure such as Rhea promising to be closer to the faithful would make them happy, even more so since according to El the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus, as the name itself suggested, was indeed the most religious of the territories in Fódlan, but the small smiles they had offered the archbishop told her otherwise. 

None of them had understood why, a few moments later, she had asked them about their opinion on Rhea’s visitation and her promise to be around the monastery too. They had mostly tittered and made more questions about the mission (as if she knew what they were supposed to do in one of those, herself) and even Sothis had laughed at her cluelessness, on how they were visibly trying to change the subject too.

That, and the fact that she had spent the rest of the month preparing the students for a real battlenagainst enemies that would have sharpened blades and the drive to eliminate all that antagonized their schemes, had been the two highlights of those weeks. Other than that, and of course the conversations with Edelgard about such things, the monastery life and the meeting with the slithers, there hadn’t been anything really worth mentioning. 

And even that part about the accursed people who had harmed El in her past was a discussion that took a while for them to have. Mostly because Byleth had seen shadows of torment and weighty recollections which had clouded her lover’s eyes after they had left. On that night Edelgard had been kept away from Byleth due to the meeting - the moment she was free it was too late for them to brave the curfew and meet face to face. In the end they had seen one another in dreams only, with the professor having to shake the princess awake from a very unusual stream of nightmares the moment she stepped upon the dreamscape and found her tossing and turning on the floor.

“It’s been eons since the last time this happened,” Byleth had commented, cradling Edelgard in her arms and soothing her with the softest of caresses and pecks. After so many years together, they knew where and how to touch each other in times of distress like those. 

“Their presence has a tendency to do that,” Edelgard had whispered, burrowing herself in the former mercenary’s neck and letting out a shaky breath. She had just seen herself and her siblings again in their time of greatest suffering and as always it had made her reel, her heart beating so fast it felt like it would escape her chest at any second. “And since I have been out of the palace for a while now, I guess I have grown unused to it.”

Byleth had known better than to press, thus she let the matter go and talked about something else in order to lighten both the mood and the dream - they had been in a dungeon that night too, though luckily none of them had been shackled like it used to happen before. Nevertheless, it had been quite a scare, even if the meeting per se had been meaningless; it had only been requested in order to inform her that the slithers were securely installed in Garreg Mach and would more than likely start needing her help for some research and other matters of their own. 

It hadn’t taken a genius to understand which of those prospects had scared Edelgard the most. 

Yet as time passed the professor saw nothing new, nothing that could alert either her, the students or the rest of the staff about an ominous presence there. Classes progressed, with her getting to know her pupils better and being asked for tea and homemade cookies by Ashe, a trip around the towns nearby and dinner with Sylvain (which was cancelled the moment Ingrid caught wind of that and asked Byleth to join her on sentry duty instead), extra training sessions with Felix and Dimitri, cooking duties with Annette and Mercedes, then tending the greenhouse with Dedue (with some special participation from Bernadetta, who apparently also loved and knew a lot about plants, plus enjoyed the calming atmosphere around the greenhouse). 

It was way more than she thought she would get as a professor. As soon as Rhea had told her she was expected to teach, she had pictured herself spending her days locked in the library studying so she would be able to pass on more than just her practical knowledge on battles and the battlefield; or sweating away in the training grounds day after day, turning some kids into seasoned warriors just as it had been done whenever someone new had joined Jeralt’s band of mercenaries.

Now, it wasn’t rare for her to be the center of her student’s conversations, trying to understand why Ingrid was dashing after Sylvain with a lance in hand and what it had to do with Felix being upset and Dimitri shaking his head at it. Or for her to listen to someone’s worries about the present, woes of the past and dreams of the future, their motivations for getting to the Officers Academy and for walking a path that tradition asked, even when some of them were a bit unsure about it. For those, as if she had any expertise on the subject, she had offered words of caution and reassurance, reminding them their lives were their own first and foremost, no matter what their parents or “tradition” had to say about it.

Funny how, whenever she had had those conversations, something tingled inside of her, a spark of recognition that she could neither name nor understand why it had begun coursing through her veins in that moment in time. 

And as much as they had heard her advice and mulled over it, they had slowly learned to trust her as more than just a teacher and the famed Ashen Demon, but as a general in times of battle and a human being too.

However much she had fallen into those roles, and would perhaps continue to do so as long as they trusted her and wanted her to be any of those things, in that particular morning she was nothing more than cold and calculating, her thoughts narrowed to the grind of steel on steel as the battle raged on. 

As such, the sword in her hands came alive as it hadn’t done in a long time. It slashed and cut, meeting the tenderness and warmth of human flesh and the tough hindrance of an armor before she unconsciously readjusted her grip and went for her enemy again, piercing skin that time. She knew her students had yet to see that side of her, the one that lived for fighting and nothing more, the one they were having a small glance of right then and there.. 

Not that she agreed with it, or wanted to let it get away with battling for the sake of battling, just as it had in her distant past. This was only for the protection of her pupils, or at least she told herself. Or at least a voice in her head assured her so.

 _“If only they hadn’t done anything of the sorts…”_ Sothis mumbled yet again, once Byleth’s feet danced over the hardened, lifeless rock of Zanado and allowed her to dodge a lance blow to her shoulder, only to retaliate with a sword hilt strike to the stomach.

The worst of her fury had dissipated, she realized at that point, looking around herself and seeing that her students were behind her and safe, apart from some scratches and small bruises that Mercedes and Annette were taking care of. Good. She nodded to herself, eyes scanning the place in front of her, the desolation that, in silence, spoke louder than words and had touched something inside of her.

Zanado, the Red Canyon. That was how Rhea had called it when she had gone to the Blue Lions classroom again last afternoon and announced that a particular band of bandits the Knights of Seiros had been tracking would be making its way to that location and that her class should deal with them. Byleth had nodded, unsure about why Dimitri, Ingrid and Ashe had widened their eyes at that. 

They had gone as early as they could on that day, hoping to get that mission done with and rest some later on, but apparently the universe had had other plans for them. When they arrived, the rogues were nowhere to be seen and only vast stretches of pointed, inhospitable rock, some cliffs and interesting ruins amidst it greeted them for the longest while. They had to lay camp for hours, the students talking in whispers behind the professor and trying to lighten the mood for their first official mission as part of the esteemed Officers Academy. 

And of course the first time that many of them would be in a real fight, all things considered. One where the slightest of mistakes could result in something ominous and serious too.

It had worked, all things considered. With Dedue and Ingrid taking turns to keep watch alongside Byleth, they spotted the bandits on their way through Zanado before they themselves could be spotted. The importance of having the element of surprise, something that the former mercenary had often told them about in lessons, finally demonstrated in practice the moment they were able to ward off two out of ten bandits who were there. 

Warding off had been their main objective at first, even if some of her students had wished to go for more drastic measures right from scratch. She wanted them to get the taste of battle, yes, and one without judges, classmates or instructors eyeing them. That was no mere exercise, but an actual day spent on the field. However, she also wanted them to know that not all of those days were spent killing others, despite the fact they were facing robbers.

Thieves or not, they were people first and foremost. They were someone else’s parents, children, loved ones. Talking to different students from different walks of life had shown her that sometimes things weren’t exactly how they met the eye at first. And while at first it had been ok to just parry them, send them off or mildly injure one or two to discourage the others, soon enough that turned into something more, the moment weapons were raised and Sylvain had been surrounded.

That split second in which he cried in pain, the sound amplified by the pool of blood which left his chest as the sword tore through it, though his surprised and inefficient block. The way her eyes widened, pupils enlarging and contracting, something in her mind turning and making time do the same in a sense. 

Then the stillness which followed, the peace during the storm, the doubts that clouded her mind as she watched everything turn to stone. The ginger boy with his mouth twisted in pain, body suspended and almost falling on rough, merciless rock. His assailant, a man with a twisted grin, twisted heart beating on his chest, weapon glistening with blood as it had just been yanked out of the boy’s form. And the others around him, smiles equally distorted, cheerful, violent in their essence.

Although Byleth didn’t understand what was going on, why her mind had been on Zanado for a second, then transported somewhere else in the next, somewhere with darkness which surrounded a stony throne that shone green - and a girl she had seen before sitting on it, too - she felt something else pulsing inside her at the vision. It was the same thing which had guided her days before, when everything was a haze of screams, red and steel. When she had been nothing more than the Ashen Demon, executing her mission to perfection, eliminating whoever stood in her way.

 _“Wait, there’s no need for you to do that,”_ Sothis, the girl sitting on the throne, uttered the moment she caught the stoic grin on Byleth’s face and read the emotion behind it. _“We can avoid it from happening, if you just let me help.”_

 _“Avoid it? What, can you turn back time now?”_ The question had been derisive, her body too antsy to get back on the fight and do all that she could to inflict pain on those who had hurt her student. Yet the second it was said, she felt something familiar ripple through her entire body, even more so when Sothis sneered at her and then nodded, proud.

As if Byleth were a kid who had by mistake figured out the solution to their problems after all.

 _“Come, I shall grant you this power of mine, so that you may be able to use it whenever the little ones need it,”_ she went on with a beam, rising to her feet and extending her right hand, reaching for Byleth while a circle of what could only be described as pure magic appeared around her, around them.

The professor strode forward in the darkness, her feet decisive as if that had been done before and there was no need to be afraid. The moment her fingertips and Sothis’s touched, rough and calloused on soft and ethereal, that small pocket of existence around them diluted and they were suddenly back to Zanado. Time, which had remained still, was then pulled back just as Byleth experienced energy gathering into herself, rewinding motions taken by others while she stood in place, observing, remembering. Reshaping the outcome of those last few minutes, or at least trying to do so.

Looking for when the first mistake had happened, and spotting it once she realized Sylvain had made his way into a circle of enemies without anyone to back him up. Nodding, Byleth focused on some seconds before that, letting that energy which was time itself ripple over her hands, through her fingers, then consolidate around her once it was released from her grasp with a sigh, as if a weight had left her chest too.

“Sylvain, with us!” She yelled once she saw movement again, realizing it had worked and things had gone back to more than a minute before the boy had fallen. He turned his head to look at her in surprise, then nodded and rushed to hers and Dimitri’s side. 

However much that failure had been erased from the universe around Byleth she didn’t know, but it was still stark clear in her mind. The sound of his scream and the sight of his blood touched something in her that made her rush to those bandits, the ones that in an alternate time had slaughtered her student with grins and chuckles on their lips. 

With the same viciousness and nary a thought about her actions, she did the same to them and to all others who dared getting close to her pupils. It would be hard to forget the stares she had received from the students once the battle was done and more blood had been spilled over the Red Canyon, while they cared for the corpses and took them away from there, to have a proper burial in the forest nearby. 

But it certainly would have been a lot worse to have one of those bodies which now laid underneath the ground belong to a fellow classmate, just because their teacher had been too late to predict their opponent’s movements before. 

In the same silence and doom that seemed to pervade Zanado as a whole, and after a last glance to the almost setting sun behind them painting the canyon crimson and silver (and green, for some reason Byleth couldn’t understand), they turned around and started their way back to the monastery, a lot less excited and more broody than they had been before.

* * *

Darkness had settled around the Blue Lions students and their professor the moment they spotted the closed gates of the monastery and the few tents of those merchants who pretty much lived in Garreg Mach. They had lit some torches for themselves as soon as the sun completely left them and saw more flames closer to the gates, giving them a sense of direction after so many hours spent in silent pondering. 

“Finally,” Sylvain grumbled more to himself than anyone else. “It felt like the journey back took longer for some reason.”

“That’s because you overdid yourself in the fight, you doofus,” Felix answered in a peeved way, shaking his head. “Not that they were hard to beat, you just need to train more instead of going out on so many stupid dates.”

“Ouch! Now that’s unfair, I’ve been training almost as much as you. Haven’t I, Professor?”

Byleth turned to the boy she had watched succumb to a group attack a few hours ago. There was no telltale sign that he remembered any of it, but unfortunately she did, the echoes of his pained scream an undertone to his voice. Still, she tried her best to seem unfazed as there was nothing to be concerned with after all. Whatever power Sothis had granted her, it had stopped something major and she should be more grateful about it than anything else. 

_“I would really appreciate some gratitude, honestly. And respect,”_ the voice in her head chimed in as if summoned by those thoughts. It wouldn’t surprise Byleth if that was the case after all.

“Actually I think I’ve seen more of Felix around the training grounds than you,” Byleth said once she felt the questioning stares she was receiving and recalled that she had been asked a question. “And Ingrid, too.”

“Ah yes, Ingrid and her knightly ideals. I’d like to see that coming true,” Sylvain guffawed, then winced once he was slapped behind the ear by the girl with said knightly ideals.

That made everyone laugh, a welcome respite after so many hours of tense silence and questions echoing around them, on the trees and the rocks that had watched their return.

“They will, if that’s what you really want,” the professor said, turning to meet Ingrid's annoyed emerald irises. They relented, for once were filled with something shiny and hopeful instead of dull and questioning. “Don’t give up on your dreams just because someone tells you they’re not worth pursuing.”

“See? At least someone gets it. Thank you, professor,” Ingrid said with a wide smile and a polite bow, even though her eyes showed that she didn’t completely believe those words. As if there was something else, something more that would eventually stop her from making her ideal life come forth.

Byleth made a mental note to talk to her later, and to some of the other pupils who had reacted in some interesting ways to her advice. It hadn’t been lost on her how many of the Blue Lions seemed chained to something, a bit too formal for their young age despite their status. Once she had mentioned that impression to Edelgard and gotten a saddened face at that, then a vague explanation about the value that crests and traditions still held in the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus. 

The professor's gaze fell then to the prince himself once they passed through the gates and the now quiet marketplace, around a cluster of students and towards the Entrance Hall. His demeanor hadn’t changed so much in that battle, though at times she had indeed caught a strange presence in his stare, a void that translated into his battle stance and turned it into something greedy, ruthless and violent.

Maybe it was the way the diminished lights in the monastery fell upon him, but for a split second Byleth could swear she saw his cheeks gaunt and pale, blood smeared on his form as a whole. 

“Ah professor, I take it everything has gone well with your mission?”

That melodious voice made Byleth shake her head and turn to look at who had said that. She had to keep a smile in place the moment she saw Edelgard standing beside professor Manuela, the two women looking ready with an easy-going air around them. Instinctively she sought for those lilac eyes that danced over her too, even if they had talked about toning things down and not being as obvious in public. Gossip still had to die down after their mock battle fiasco, but still, they were trying their best to keep some healthy distance - even though they would sorely complain about it when they met in dreams.

She had a second to think that it wouldn’t be good if her entire class saw she and the princess interacting like that, only to turn around and realize that most of them had taken the shortest route back to their dormitories and only Dimitri remained.

“It has, yes,” she replied, feeling more at ease in that setting. Even so, she fixed her eyes on Manuela’s and not on the girl she loved. It would spell disaster if her teacher managed to divine there was something more than respect between them. 

“Are you going to your own mission now?” Dimitri inquired before Byleth could do the same, standing beside her just as Edelgard and Manuela were. 

“Indeed. The Black Eagles were tasked with eliminating some bandits south of Zanado, yet apparently they took longer than expected to reach that place,” Edelgard answered in a nonchalant tone. That was when Byleth realized that the students she had passed earlier on were probably El’s classmates too.

“Be careful out there, Edelgard. No matter how much you’ve prepared yourself, the enemy can work in unpredictable ways and overwhelm you if your guard is down,” Dimitri said, making three pairs of eyes turn his way with different emotions on them. 

Underlying Edelgard’s annoyance, Manuela’s cheekiness and Byleth’s wonder there was a feeling of repetition or recognition, in a sense. As if, although these words had surprised them, it was almost as if those same halls had heard them being uttered more than once.

“Why, that is… the exact nature of a battle, Dimitri,” the princess retorted, somewhat unsure about what to respond in regards to that. “We cannot control everything, or the world around us at large. The one thing we can do is prepare for the worst - and rest assured that this is something I have done.” She stopped after that, her glare showing only part of her fury. Byleth could understand why; she hated being demeaned and in her mind, that was exactly what had happened. “Now, professor Manuela, I believe the others are already waiting for us. If you excuse me, Dimitri, Professor.”

The prince bowed on instinct, his eyes wide and guilty, then watched as Edelgard paraded outside by herself, passing as close to Byleth as she could without them being too obvious about it. 

“I’m sorry about this, truly. She means well, young prince,” Manuela said in a sheepish voice, stepping near them. “It’s good to see others looking out for my little ones too.” Here she winked at Byleth, her own little farewell before joining her students outside. 

Did she know? Yes, so it was said that Edelgard was often seen spending time with Byleth, asking for clarifications on some combat techniques and even axe moves, on her life as a mercenary and other questions in general. At least that was what the world saw, the topics they ended up discussing whenever they were caught standing too close together before class, during break or when evening came. And yes, they had toned it down considerably after the mock battle and mostly resorted to visiting each other’s rooms close to curfew, but still. 

“That didn't really go too well, did it?” 

She was yet again pulled out of her own worries by a small comment such as that, then watched Dimitri’s almost defeated form, shoulders lurched forward and eyes downcast. Ah yes, there was the mystery of that interaction just then, or why Byleth had seen him looking a tad too much at the princess whenever the two classes had to share the training grounds or during meals. Again she was shaken by how strange that felt, in a way that made no sense to her since it didn’t stem from jealousy or anything of the sorts. 

It was just a small whisper, one that caressed her skin with ominous promises of how things could go wrong if she didn’t step in. 

“You seem very protective of her,” Byleth deadpanned, hiding her own intuition behind a stoic face. Either that, her statement or a mixture of those made Dimitri do a double take. She decided to press it a bit more in hopes he would talk to her, as they had yet to discuss other matters. “Do you like her?”

She had a feeling Sothis had given the loudest, longest sigh she had ever heard in her entire life while Dimitri looked at her with wide and scared eyes. 

“N-no, professor, there is nothing of the sorts. She hm-” he faltered, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt for the first time since she had started teaching them. “She was a… childhood friend. One of my dearest ones, too, even though she wasn’t in Fhirdiad for the longest time.”

Byleth had to keep herself from protesting and asking if he was sure that had been Edelgard. Keeping her expression neutral, she simply nodded while trying to remember if El had ever told her anything about it, eventually coming out empty-handed. Had she said something when both were younger, when the princess had recently been taken back from the dungeon? 

“However, as much as I cherish these memories, I am afraid she has forgotten me and everything we did in that blissful year that she was there,” Dimitri continued, his stark blue eyes turning darker, duller, a visual sign of his distress. 

Ah well, that was something that made more sense. Edelgard did say that most of her childhood memories before the experiments and their shared dreams were a haze she could never dissipate and glance behind. It pained the professor just as much, as she was sure there were joyous moments with her siblings and many more, better recollections hiding behind that fog. “Have you tried talking to her about it?” Byleth inquired, wondering if that wouldn’t help the princess too. If something could jog her memory, maybe there was a chance there was no need for all of that to remain hidden. 

“I have not and yes, I know I should try. But at the same time… It’s Imperial princess Edelgard von Hresvelg we are talking about. Surely she has more important things to think about than silly childhood times.”

He sounded so defeated right then that Byleth almost said she'd talk to her for him, then stopped herself just in time. “Well,” she began with a smile, something that she hoped would bring him reassurance. “You’re the prince of Faerghus and still remember those things. If they matter to you, there’s a chance it would matter to her as well and you’ll never know if you don’t try. I don’t know how exactly you could go about that, but at least keep in mind that you want to talk about it. Once the opportunity presents itself, just go for it.”

His demeanor wasn’t any less downcast as before, she noted. That didn’t mean his eyes hadn’t changed, becoming a bit more open. That was how she knew he would give it some thought about the whole matter - and hoped that the idea wouldn’t die that soon either. 

“Thank you, professor. Your support even in those things never ceases to amaze me.” As she tilted her head in a silent question, he went on. “At first I considered you callous and cold, hardened by a life of battles and hardship as a mercenary. Yet as each day goes by I watch you help and encourage us in every single way you can. I know you have told Annette to rest and Felix to focus on himself. Why, just earlier with Ingrid today… It baffles me, in a good way. So thank you so much for everything and I apologize for thinking so shallowly of you before.”

She shook her head, understanding where his perception of her had come from. “It’s the least I can do in any case. And again, I want you to know I’m here if you need me.”

They knew what she was referring to in so many unspoken words, allowing him to take the first step and approach her with what needed to be said, what was still between them and had been so since the mock battle and other smaller instances during training. Dimitri shifted his weight, unsure. A part of him wanted to go forward and tell the entire story, about his dance practices with a certain princess and the evenings they spent together, talking in hushed tones about her family, the siblings she was terribly missing and on how things were going in the Empire too. Then their separation, as sudden as her arrival, followed by years wondering why she never returned his letters. 

And finally what weighed on his mind every day and night, the ghosts that whispered to him and asked him to do what they could not, what they had been unable to.

It was compelling to let go of his burdens for one second, to trust someone else to hold them and know the truth as well - if she hadn’t already learned of something like that by his classmates too. His throat clamped shut the moment he tried muttering the first word, though, and that was when he realized that he wasn’t yet ready for that. No matter how many years had passed and how many times he had revisited those scenes in his mind, in his sleepless nights and even more so upon setting foot in the Officers Academy, he could not describe them to her. 

In the end he shook her head, a silent apology in his eyes even though that was met with a small smile and the wish for him to go get some sleep. He barely nodded and watched her walk back towards the lake, probably to her own quarters, yet stood there alone for some minutes too long. 

No one knew how much longer he would have stayed there like so, if someone hadn’t shaken his shoulder and called his name a few times before he shook his head and blinked to Claude’s concerned eyes on his face.

“Oh Claude, I didn’t see you there,” the prince said as if nothing wrong had been happening before.

“Yeah and apparently you didn’t hear me either,” he commented, his expression at once neither playful nor taunting, but entirely worried. “Is everything ok? Did you get hurt on that stupid mission?” 

“Uh? Oh, n-nothing of the sorts, really,” Dimitri stammered, realizing then how unconvincing he had sounded once Claude narrowed his eyes at him. “And you, what are you doing out here at this time?”

“Making sure none of my peeps got lost on the way to their rooms,” he shrugged, emerald eyes expertly trained on Dimitri. “Our mission went a lot faster than yours, but then we’re better anyways so that was expected.”

Despite the feeling of dread which had been coursing through the prince after his failure to voice his woes, he couldn’t stop a smile from blooming on his face. “Whatever you say, but I suppose we shall see that at the Battle of the Eagle and Lion.”

“As if we needed that stupid thing to prove who’s superior,” Claude crossed his arms behind his head, though the gesture wasn’t as at ease as usual. “Now c’mon, your princeliness, why don’t we go grab something to eat? Kitchen’s just there but I’ll let you use my shoulder if you need some help limping to it.”

Scoffing at the last part of that sentence, Dimitri nodded and fell into a companionable pace beside the future Duke, a part of his mind wondering why that was both so unexpected but comforting to him. 

* * *

Byleth thought the strain of that day - and whatever she had done back there about Sylvain - would mean she'd find the solace of sleep as soon as she hit her quarters. She had no idea how far away from the truth she actually was, since the moment she closed the doors of her room behind her, it was as if her energy had been restored by a very efficient healing spell.

She sighed, miffed with that new development. She knew herself well enough to understand what that meant, that she'd be lucky to get a few hours of sleep at the most. Even so, she forced herself to lie on the rather tough mattress and close her eyes, waiting. 

There was too much on her mind for her to rest though, and it wouldn't be fun to simply nitpick thought after thought like that. Some days did go in that manner, she knew, even more so when a lot had occurred during and after a battle, the implications of her conversation with Dimitri still rendering her intrigued. 

_"Well if you have extra energy to spend, why not walk around the monastery or something?"_ Sothis suggested after a long sigh, as if annoyed with her. _"I am not annoyed with you, just with the situation in general. I, too, long for some rest from your mind. It's been going too fast for my liking and won't leave me alone."_

Byleth had to guffaw at that as she rose to her feet and mulled over the suggestion, but in the end shook her head and remained indoors. It was an odd sensation she had, a part of her wishing to go against curfew and do something else outside and another one that thought it was too much trouble to actually try it.

 _"That's called being lazy, you doofus,"_ the child said, rolling her eyes heavenwards. _"It's good to see you experiencing so much more but I did wish we could skip some feelings though."_

 _"Hm? What do you mean about that?"_ Byleth inquired, stopped pacing around and watched how some light from the posts outside crept into her room. She hadn't bothered turning on the candles when entering her quarters and kept it that way, enjoying the soothing atmosphere and hoping it would lull her to sleep soon.

 _"Erh uh, nothing! Nothing at all, forget what I said."_ She must have reconsidered it, though, as she added. _"Being with the little ones has helped you, I think. It has shown you a new aspect of life, one that not even being with the princess was able to awaken in you. And for that, I'm glad."_

Byleth was thankful, albeit surprised and unsure about what to think. Yes, she recalled that Sothis had been with her since always, at least according to her, yet it wasn't until recently that she had started listening to her voice. She wondered if there was a reason why, though when she had asked about the matter she was met by silence and a doubt that echoed her own.

They were both at a loss about it, about the dreams with Edelgard and why the monastery felt so odd. Even then, in the silence and supposed safety of her room, she sensed that things could crumble and be led astray in any point in time. 

She hoped it was nothing but her listening to too many ghost stories - and vowed to stop Mercedes whenever they were together and those were told again. Thus she just paced around like that, languid, trying to wear herself off in a space and speed that were less than ideal for such a task.

At some point in time, after overhearing an interesting conversation from the outside about the theory and practice of magic between Lysithea and her own Annette, she decided to lie down again and try to get some sleep. Her mind was keen to wander on the topic of their discussion, on the promise those two girls had made to study together as often as they could and the common advice to rest. She hoped Annie would listen to the younger mage, who was famous for working hard and being very studious, though she thought that, if nothing, that would stimulate them both to train harder. 

It was right then, while making a mental note to watch over both and tell them to please take breaks more often, that she was slowly enveloped by comforting waves of sleep and fell into an easy slumber after distracting herself from tougher matters…

Only to open her eyes to a beautiful night sky, cloudless and chilly, on one of the many villages perching on some hill or another at the Oghma mountains. She turned aside and was surprised to see what she was sure was a dream representation of the Black Eagles students lying in wait behind bushes and trees that surrounded the small, simple houses in straw and rock that stood here and there.

Manuela was at the front with Petra and Caspar, while Bernadetta, Linhardt and Dorothea stayed behind. Hubert and Ferdinand were to her left, even though their eyes didn't register her presence and they seemed more adamant on keeping watch. 

Then to her right, to her surprise, was a sleeping Edelgard, lightly tossing and turning at what was probably another one of her nightmares, the ones she'd have when they didn't meet in dreams. 

The professor knelt and picked up her lover from the rocky, uneven floor, hugging her and calling her name until lilac eyes opened to meet hers. 

"Hey there, sleepyhead," Byleth greeted in a gentle tone, running a thumb over her cheeks. "Another nightmare?"

"Y-yes but, what are you doing here? We are supposed to be laying siege and waiting but - _oh_." The princess got to a sitting position and looked around, noticing how still everything was. 

"You're sleeping, yeah, very lightly I'd say," the former mercenary nodded, letting them both get used to that scenario. "Is this where you guys are right now?"

"Indeed. It is rather close to the monastery, but apparently thieves have been causing trouble to this village for a while. Which makes me wonder why the church wants us to do their dirty work and get rid of them." There was disgust in her voice and it wasn't difficult to understand why, either. "In any case, how did your mission go? I wanted to ask but you know…"

"Manuela and Dimitri, yes," Byleth edged closer to the girl and held her hand, playing with her gloved fingers.

She wanted to ask about Edelgard's childhood, about her being in Fhirdiad at some point or another, but didn't think they would have the time to discuss it whole; that was a very flimsy dream to begin with and would more than likely be shattered the moment someone spotted the bandits they were waiting for. 

That was why she shrugged, made a mental note to address that later and decided to keep focused on the question. "It went well, luckily the thieves did show up where we wanted them to and it didn't take too long for us to get rid of them. I hope it's the case with yours, but ours were really disorganized. It was like they'd gotten together recently or something."

"That wouldn't be so uncommon. It is troublesome, but some people do lose a lot of stock and other goods in the colder months, especially at the mountains when winter can be merciless," Edelgard shook her head, lilac eyes downcast. "Hence the spike in robberies around the new year isn't such a novelty for the church altogether. I just wonder what they are doing, asking us to go after them."

"Maybe they want people to learn that you'll get killed by skilled kids and their professors if you step out of line and go against the law?" Byleth deadpanned to lighten the mood, though she had no serious explanation or answer to that question either. 

Edelgard chuckled and slapped her arm, playful for the first time in that dream. Perhaps it was because she was still with her classmates in the background but her demeanor was a lot more polished and distant that night. "I hope there will be no killings here. They might be thieves, but they are someone's parent, sibling, beloved. And I would hate to take a life in the name of the church, too."

"Is that what's been bothering you? You look tense now and also did when we were talking back in the monastery," Byleth inquired and was about to caress her hands when the princess started doing that instead. 

The gesture was slow and rhythmic, soothing for both of them. It was always good to see El initiating contact in any way, so it made a small beam cover Byleth's earlier, concerned frown. 

"That, yes, and Dimitri's caution. Why did he have to say that? I am not a child who doesn't know how to fight," she huffed, eyes narrowing at the mere suggestion that she was incapable of doing something like that. "Why, I am sure I would have bested him in the mock battle had you not knocked me out yourself."

That was a theory Byleth wasn't really keen on testing anytime soon. At least not when Dimitri was in one of those ominous battle moods at the very least. There was something warning her about letting them fight, the same thing that had almost bellowed at her to end the mock battle herself in any case.

"Don't let it get to you like that, El," Byleth chuckled in order to dissolve her anger, pecking her forehead and getting a glare in response. "In any case, we tried our best not to kill and only to warn but…" she shrugged, unsure about how to go on. "They tried to get Annette and I just couldn't let them. Then Sylvain, who they really got but then-"

"Sylvain? Everything looked fine when I saw him flirting with Dorothea before we left," the princess frowned, curious. "Though unfortunately I cannot say the same about after he said something or another that upset her, though."

"Something happened back there, El," Byleth's voice dropped to a low pitch, never a good sign, even more so when she ignored that piece of humor. Edelgard could also see tension ebbing through her posture, her muscles taut, free hand balled into a fist. She placed a hand on the older woman's shoulder, squeezing it for support and encouragement. "First Zanado itself, where we ambushed our bandits. It felt… familiar, in a sense. I can't explain how," she added once Edelgard's eyes prodded hers for more details. "It was as if I had been there before but at the same time, in another version of it. 

"It didn't use to be so lifeless and still, so deadly, I think. But that's not what's really important, I suppose." She paused, knowing she was mostly gushing and not making much sense. However, it wasn't as if anything about that place and the fight themselves were making any sense to her either. "About Sylvain, at one moment he was hurt - killed, I think. Then after something-"

"There they are! Is everyone ready, weapons handy? This is real life combat, everyone, so no being sloppy and trying to be my heroes out there! There's no reward for being killed."

Manuela's voice embraced them for a moment, so much more real than everything else in that dream. That was how they knew things had moved and the two of them would be torn apart again, once Edelgard fully woke up. The princess gave her lover a forlorn look, then leaned in quick for a kiss and a whisper:

"This isn't over, ok? As soon as we have time, I would like to hear all about your mission and what happened. Sleep well, By."

"Good luck out there, El. I'll be waiting for you," Byleth managed to smile through the haze of concern which took over her mind, not only due to her own predicament but because of Manuela's words too. 

Edelgard was marching to her first actual battle, even though she had faced a much worse one years ago in a dark, stale dungeon. She wished she could be there to help and to be near, but she had to trust that her lover would know what to do and how to keep herself safe. 

Sighing once the setting around her faded to black and she was plunged into a familiar room with a stone throne and green lights, she turned her thoughts again to the strangeness of Zanado and time, waiting for when the girl she loved would come back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing battle scenes is really something xD like it's easy either focus too much on one fighter and all of their actions or just use general terms with everyone involved, both of which are interesting approaches when it comes to having an entire classroom on the field. In this case I wanted to give an overall view of Byleth's month like a backstory, what led her to that moment in Zanado and what happened in it. 
> 
> Dimitri's dialogue with Edelgard was something that surprised me the first time I saw it in game, especially when stoic Byleth has an option that's goes, "puppy love?" XD but anyways.
> 
> Next chapter will have a bit more happening around the monastery too. Thank you for reading and have a great weekend!


	5. When the Past Comes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edelgard and Byleth spend some time apart due to their own routines, but meet whenever they can to solve some issues.
> 
> The slithers then come with information about their next plans, before Byleth sees someone strange talking to Dimitri as well.

For most, dreams were settings where interesting little things happened when one was asleep and made for interesting little stories to tell friends once the day started, often amidst laughs and a good cup of coffee, tea and breakfast. As such, they were forgotten throughout the hecticness of some days, swept under the rug of routine and familiarity which clouded the world around them.

For Edelgard and Byleth, however, dreams had not only been something they had looked forward to in order to meet each other after long days, but a reality in itself - their reality, where there was no one that could separate them and they were free to talk, to cry and to laugh as if there were no tomorrow. As such, when the pressures of the physical world got too much, it wasn’t rare for them to never want those dreams to end, to remain forever there in their peaceful little bubble. One they could alter and control to their own liking. One where there were no slithers, no missions, no enemy troops to be dispelled.

No war to be fought, preparations to be discussed and consequences to be weighed.

Yet there was just so much that dreams could do, so much that they could replace when compared to reality. That was something the two women had found out upon meeting each other and everything else that had happened since then. And that was exactly why, on that Friday evening after a long week of classes, drills and new assignments being issued, they had decided to hang out in Edelgard's room in order to spend some time together. 

Byleth had surreptitiously made her way up there once she was done with a late dinner, since she had been doing some research in the library about the nature of dreams and their meanings, trying to find out some reports about what she and the princess had been doing for years, an explanation to that phenomenon. What had started with that spiralled into her getting more books, this time about legends surrounding Zanado and the history of Fódlan, something she had heard a little from Edelgard and got to know more about when reading before class. 

Though it was a good thing she hadn’t been assigned as a history teacher, because she ended up falling asleep halfway through the third page of a huge compendium, only to have Tomás wake her up, suggest lighter readings on the matter and usher her out of the library with some books of his own choosing in her hands. 

After stacking her books as neatly as possible at her room, she had gone to the dining hall, blindly grabbing some sandwich or another to eat and musing at how much she missed her lover. They hadn’t really been able to see each other through that week, one after the Zanado mission, as they had both been somewhat tired and with a lot of academic work to do. As a result they hadn't even discussed the issue of Sylvain and what happened during the mission, since both would rather enjoy some time together in their dreams than make it stressful and tense with things they couldn't explain.

It didn’t help that just two days ago Edelgard had kindly reported another meeting with the slithers was looming close on the horizon, even if the first one had gone well enough. Again, the princess had no clue what they wanted from her, though she had a sinking suspicion they might try doing something as her birthday was arriving. 

“They always make sure I remember how my life should be dedicated to fulfilling my role here and nothing more,” she had informed Byleth on that particularly gloomy dream, when they had discussed the issue. “Be it a small, visual reminder of my time in the dungeons or a verbal one. Suffice it to say I don’t look forward to that day at all.”

That, and the downcast mist upon her eyes, had made the woman’s protest at attending the meeting as well die in her throat before the words could cause further harm. It wouldn’t be fair for her to say something right then, even though she wanted to and thought her presence could help to keep Edelgard grounded in reality and not get lost in shaky thoughts of her past. 

Even so, as if able to read her mind, the princess had shaken her head and uttered a line or two about not wanting to compromise Byleth, her element of surprise in a war that could turn badly if the slithers had other ideas and decided to abandon El halfway. 

Which, as impractical as that sounded, still had to be taken into consideration when their so-called allies were so dubious and mysterious in nature.

“You still want to come along, don’t you?” Edelgard asked from her place on the bed, sitting cross-legged while Byleth had taken a seat on the floor, back leaning against the bedrail. It wasn’t the most comfortable position, but at least that allowed the two of them to be close. 

“Yeah, I do.” Byleth nodded, looking up at her lover’s concerned face. “But I know you well enough to not press it any more than I already did. Instead, would you see me right after and if possible, not in dreams? I’d like to help and all.”

Edelgard beamed, closed her eyes. She knew she hadn’t won the battle, but that was something she could compromise with. It kept everyone safe and, most importantly, made sure Byleth wouldn’t unnecessarily fret over something so minor as a meeting with those people. 

“Of course, By. I will do my best to do so. Since they shall come to my quarters at around twilight tomorrow, depending on what they have to discuss I can go to your room afterwards,” the princess answered, placed a hand on that mane of unruly hair that had become a tad more disheveled after a day on the training grounds, and petted it slowly with her fingertips. “Thank you, truly.”

That was suboptimal for the professor but it would have to suffice. Still, she grunted in acquiescence and went on, following a bout of intuition she had at looking over the girl’s face. “You have a feeling about why they called this meeting, don’t you?”

A few seconds were spent in silence, making Byleth shift positions and lean her cheek against Edelgard’s knee, relishing in the contact and the feeling of a gloved hand on her face. She knew the princess was rather shy about her body, about how every inch of it was lined with scars and was thankful that she never had to explain why she wore gloves and such constraining clothing all the time - that behavior was expected and seen in others members of the nobility, especially those that tended to keep to the old ways like the three royal families of Fódlan (even if Claude was a case in particular).

Byleth sometimes wondered if she would ever be able to help the girl with that, even though they hadn’t been physically together long enough. Their relationship, a budding flower, had seen some changes the moment they had met and both were more than happy to respect each other’s boundaries. It just made the woman sad to see the girl she admired still harboring little tidbits that spoke about her trauma like that.

“I have a hunch,” she said at last, after a long exhale. That was all Byleth needed to inform her it was probably not something good. “There have been rumors that someone has been speaking ill of the church, and more importantly of Rhea, to the Western Church. That includes all of the faithful, both peasants and religious figures… and a minor Kingdom noble by the name of Lonato. Have you heard of him? If I am not mistaken, one of your students is his relative, though not by blood.”

“The name sounds familiar,” the former mercenary mused, unsure about it at first, trying to recall who had mentioned it to her before. The answer came to mind when she remembered a very good evening spent walking around the city in the company of a student, who bravely revealed his not-so-nice past to her. “Ah yes, that’s Ashe. He used to be a thief until Lord Lonato took him in, or something.”

The princess nodded; she had figured something of the sorts in her letters with him. Letters that, for now, she wanted to keep secret and would rather not expose just in case her plan worked - or did not, and she would have to report a failure of that magnitude. “I have a feeling they will want us to work with him, to add his strength to our cause even if he is indeed a minor noble.”

“It would be strategic to have a connection in the Kingdom, no matter how small," Byleth agreed, recalling theories that she had recently read about and would soon start teaching, on slowly spreading one’s influence through inconspicuous sources. “And what do you think-”

Byleth’s words were interrupted by a loud knock, one that made both of them bolt and for Edelgard’s heart to skip a beat. They shared a quick, scared look while glancing around, unsure about what to do.

“You expecting someone?” The former mercenary deadpanned in a small voice, trying to dilute that tension and earning nothing but a dirty glare from her lover instead.

“Who is it?” Edelgard shouted instead of answering the snickering professor, wondering how she could say something so stupid in a time like that, when they could be found out - and who knew what would happen after that.

“It’s me, Dorothea. Manuela is looking for professor Byleth and told me to give you something for your wound.”

The voice was flat, uninterested and even bored. That was fine, Dorothea and Edelgard didn’t have the best of relationships all things considered and the commoner had been keen on turning her nose at the princess as soon as she found out about her status. Which was great, given how Edelgard’s main goal for the war was to achieve equality and lack of distinction between people.

Yes, El thought as she silently ushered Byleth to crawl underneath her bed and pulled the blankets over her just in case, then got to her feet and made her way to the door, she had started out amazingly if she couldn’t even convince a classmate of her goals. 

“Look, do you need me to open the damn door myself or - oh, a fine night, Lady Edelgard.” Dorothea had started yelling, then dropped her tone to an inside voice without losing the venom to it as soon as the princess opened the door. She bowed, deeply, mockingly, emerald eyes never leaving the bed behind them. “Apologies if I interrupted your noble respite.”

Edelgard sighed, stepped aside so the other girl could come in, rubbing her temples at the sudden headache that had started. That was so not going well - but she wished it would. Antagonizing Dorothea wasn’t the answer, though, as she had found out a few days ago when asking her to not address her by a title. 

“Thank you for this, truly,” El said instead, taking the small flask of ointment from Dorothea’s hand. “Had professor Manuela said anything, I would have passed by the infirmary myself to get it.”

“In the same way you consider yourself too noble to let her, or any of us heal you? Not likely.” The former songstress lashed out, crossing her arms in front of her chest and looking away. 

Not that she missed the wince her words caused and how the smaller girl’s body became taut, as if she had messed with something a lot deeper than that. Unknown to her, it was exactly the case since the matter was a sore one with Edelgard and the reason why she wouldn’t let anyone look at her gashes was the same one that justified the constant use of gloves. 

She didn't want others to see the labyrinth of pain her past had etched upon her skin. Maybe that meant she should learn healing magic to apply it on herself. Not even Byleth had been allowed a glance of the wound Dorothea was referring to, a not-so-superficial line that ran its way from one of her lower ribs to the hipbone and had been made when, in a second of recklessness, she had gotten in the way of a thief’s blade in order to protect the mage in front of her right then. 

“I- that is not what it seems,” the princess mumbled, downcast. She placed the flask on her table and looked down, feeling the same sort of apprehension that had taken hold of her during that match, as she had done her best to stop the bleeding before someone noticed. 

Dorothea had noticed, and that meant the entire monastery more than likely heard the story of how princess Edelgard von Hresvelg had, quite vehemently, refused the aid of any and all healers on that match, including Manuela herself. The Black Eagles professor knew better than to press the point, even though she never failed to ask how she was doing before classes started and had told Edelgard to report if she felt anything different, then given her enough medicine to heal a battalion if the need came. 

Not that those kind acts would be seen as such by others, as was the case with Dorothea, former songstress and Manuela’s student at the Mittelfrank Opera Company. Of course the girl would rise up to the occasion to protect her mentor and also rile up someone she considered noble scum.

“Whatever you say,  _ princess. _ ” The last part was added out of spite, as she had noticed that Edelgard didn’t like being called that. “Anyways, have you seen professor Byleth? Manuela and professor Hanneman need to compare notes with her about our assignments and so on.” She turned her head to the side, skipping the smaller girl completely…

And that was when her eyes fell on a harmless sheet of paper with El’s neat calligraphy. 

Something there caught her eye, some lines that seemed too at odds with the setting, with who they belonged to. They took her over in a way that made her almost miss Edelgard's mumbled response and the question that followed it, too.

"Why would you think she is here to begin with?" Maybe others would have said that with some accusation, some defense behind their words. Yet the princess's voice was practiced, stable and precise. 

It was so eerily like Dorothea's that she almost jumped back at hearing it, at noticing how that was exactly how she sounded to herself when she had something to hide. That should have made her weary, suspicious and even more at odds with the other girl, but somehow it spoke to a pain that had been ingrained in her chest for too many years. 

The pain of suffering, of going through something that was kept secret so no one would be able to judge and tear her apart word by word, breath by breath, glance by glance. 

"I uh, you two seem to be close, is all. So I wondered if you hadn't seen her somewhere," Dorothea stammered, almost missing the fact that she had never asked if Byleth was in the room to begin with. 

Yet something rose in her chest, a dull, searing ache that made her heart clench and want to make tears fall from her eyes. For what she didn't know, but it was enough for her to give up on her previous onslaught, apologize for any inconveniences and bolt out of the quarters with too many doubts in her mind…

And words about equality, about a society no longer divided by crests that pitied nobles against commoners and made so many people's lives miserable in different ways, echoing in her heart too. 

* * *

Their presence always made her shiver, the cold that seemed to permeate their entire essence and souls ebbing into wherever they were and whoever had the displeasure of having to be close to them. This time it was no different, although the weather had warmed up considerably in preparation for summer and most students had already started complaining about it. 

Edelgard sighed as she waited, as her room - or herself, really - already felt a lot chillier than it had been a few seconds ago. She knew they were close, as some of them were infiltrated in the monastery to begin with, but even so it was something else to have to talk to them face to face, have to listen to their often derisive, diminishing words about her and humans in general. 

The fact that there was a chance Those Who Slither in the Dark were also human, or descended from humans anyways, wasn't lost on her. The very few sources attesting to their existence couldn't really get to a consensus about it and she wondered how many researchers had met their end trying to get more information about them. She and Hubert were in a tad of a privileged position and her vassal had been doing his best to add to what little knowledge they had about them.

Not that they were completely safe from them, a lie Edelgard had tried telling Byleth and that didn't stick at all. Who really understood what was going in their minds to begin with. 

She rose from the seat, homework abandoned ten minutes ago as her heart thundered in her ribs, an usual response that she loathed and always tried keeping under control. Her face was impassive, the result of being trained to appear nonchalant and unfazed no matter what. No matter how many memories and feelings were running through her bloodstream, pooling in a heart that had been torn by the very people who she was about to see. 

There was nothing to worry about though, she told herself and was still unconvinced, clasping and unclasping her hands. She hoped the meeting was about Lonato, about using him as an aid and a way to direct their forces in the Kingdom when the war began. Again, as far as her dubious allies went, she was completely in the dark about their intentions and would remain so in many others occasions, she knew. It was part of working with them - a part she hated since uncertainty always made her more uncomfortable than she cared to admit. 

Her thoughts were interrupted and abruptly stilled when there was first a rap on her door and a prickly feeling against her skin. She inquired after the one who had knocked and told Hubert to come in once his voice answered, then braced herself for all that would happen next when that small, painful sensation walked over and within her skin. Her scars, reacting to those who had made them so many years ago.

"You are on time, as usual," she told her vassal as he bowed after locking the door behind him. They were both standing next to the study table, giving a wide berth for their "friends" to make themselves seen at last. 

"And so are they, it seems." The moment those words left his mouth, he was hit with a wave of darkness, one that was familiar to him due to the nature of his magic but a lot stronger as well. 

They felt the temperature in the room become chilly, almost to a degree that made them shiver. After a few seconds and a snapping sound, they were greeted with an unknown figure dressed in black robes and a hood, the stark white symbol that represented them stamped on the chest. The few visible parts of their skin, namely a bit of their cheek and hands, were deadly purplish, traced by bulging veins.

“I believe we have not met before,” Edelgard spoke first, her voice deep and every bit as regal and commanding as she could afford to be.

“Indeed, Your Highness.” The title was often used as a jest when they were forced to talk to her. Mostly their negotiations were made via her uncle, but once or twice someone new had to be sent. “I am here in Solon’s place, since he got caught up with mundane affairs and could not make it.”

She could only wonder what had truly made the slither unavailable, but knew she wouldn’t really get any answers then. Plus that stupid, unnecessary title again. For ancient, apparently knowledgeable creatures, the slithers surely liked rubbing their superiority over her whenever they had the chance. It was almost childish to say the least. “Will I have the honor of learning your name?”

“Or seeing your face, as it is not customary for someone to address the Imperial Princess while hooded,” Hubert reminded their guest, though the girl wished he hadn't said that. She didn’t want to give them any more reason to spite her, though their need for her would still remain.

After all, she was their connection to the world above grounds, the one serving as decoy to their operations and that one day would rule as a puppet Emperor to the unified Fódlan they wished to subdue. No matter how much they claimed she was expendable and worthless, she had been and would always be their most successful experiment.

“I am afraid not, but where are my manners, correct?” The creature deeply bowed; even that didn’t feel genuine at all. 

After that, they launched into a speech about Lord Lonato’s involvement, the words (some of them distorted) that had convinced him about how the Central Church needed to be changed and the archbishop should be destroyed. They said something about a letter which he would carry and how even he knew his time would come soon, that he was meant to die in the battle that would happen. 

The surprising part, the one that made Edelgard falter and widen her eyes in curiosity, was their mention of how the princess might need to talk to some Western Church fools if the slithers weren’t able to fully convince them to attack the monastery later, during the Rite of Rebirth. When she queried about the necessity of her remaining undercover, they pointed to the bed, to the newly wrapped objects that now occupied it.

“And that is why I have come to deliver these.” They turned, letting Edelgard and Hubert look. It was a suit of sorts, covered in armor from head to toe and with an opening where a mask could be fit. The slither searched for something in their robes and, finding it, handed it to her. “This is the disguise you shall use while in operations that will need your assistance, or when we have to meet in more open spaces. You cannot deny this like you did last time.”

She turned to inspect the mask, using it as a way to make sure they couldn’t read her. It wasn’t the first time the slithers had devised something for her to conceal herself, but she had always done her best to remain as far from their influence as she could. 

“This is our latest technology,” the slither continued, as she had failed to express a reaction or say something in return, the red and white mask still in her grip. “There is a voice distortion spell in there, as well as a mechanism that will allow you to warp places. Solon will explain it better when he has the chance.

“An armor with similar resources was built for your soldier and shall be delivered to him shortly. I suggest you may start thinking of deploying his skills, as my bosses want to make sure his prowess is worth the risk we run keeping him on your leash. He can be quite a fearsome one, I have heard.”

“Indeed he can. Tell whoever sent you that he shall be at the Holy Mausoleum when the attack is launched,” she answered, relieved that situation would be taken care of.

“Unless you have need of his skills right away, that is,” Hubert spoke up and both turned to look at him. “He has expressed a desire for exercise and it would be foolish to keep him waiting for that long.” And indeed he had, just that afternoon too. Which was something that had been weighing heavily on Edelgard’s mind as well.

“That is not our problem to solve,” they dismissed the offer in a callous way, but not without a hint of fear. Edelgard had noticed that even the slithers were cautious when it came to Jeritza – and with good reason, as some of them who were foolish enough to step into his hunting grounds had been slaughtered beyond recognition more than once.

“Might I ask what is so important in the Holy Mausoleum that will make you risk coming that close to the Archbishop herself? Even though your deeds will be done by someone else?” The girl inquired, truly curious.

“I suppose there is no harm in sharing that, given that you are our dearest ally.” That made the three of them snicker, knowing how layered and complicated their relationship actually was. “We need to know what has become of Seiros. And what better place to search for than in her supposed resting place? Plus, there might be something we need in there.”

The princess nodded, wondering what they would find when that mission was concluded. If she were to believe the Church’s lore, after a while Saint Seiros had simply vanished from the world, rumored to have gone back to the Goddess after her work protecting Fódlan from the evil gods was finished. If her father was to be believed, however, she still roamed the Earth, closer than the slithers could ever think. There was always the chance they knew about that as well and were simply testing her, but she’d take her chances.

Thinking about that would only give her a headache, as it often did when they were concerned. “Well, if you have nothing else to say, I believe it is time for us to part ways,” she said, wanting that meeting to be over with.

“Indeed. Farewell, Flame Emperor.” They mock curtseyed again before warping out of the room. 

They were left in warmth where before there had been a void. That was usual when those beings were involved, as was the apprehension that plagued their hearts with that meeting. They were allies, they were enemies. They were the darkness and the cold from dungeons and shackles alike. They were an asset when carving the path to freedom, though one that came with constraints.

Edelgard would take those consequences though, if that meant making a world worth living in. A world that she could call her own. 

Unfortunately, however, that wasn’t the only time the slithers or someone related to them would show up at the monastery through the month. Days passed and Byleth was almost able to forget how tense and mysterious Edelgard had been when she did as promised and paid the professor a visit right after the meeting. It had been tough for the woman to properly know what to say then since she had so little information about the matter at hands, but she did her best as always, while keeping a little secret of her own too.

Luckily hers was a lot less ominous and promised some good, carefree times if things went as she wanted them to. On her way to the library in that afternoon, Byleth had overheard Dorothea and Manuela talking about the possibility of planning a surprise party for Edelgard’s birthday, as she was their House Leader and deserved to unwind for a bit. Dorothea had sounded a bit more reserved about the whole ordeal, but open to the idea of doing something different nonetheless and more than ready to help in whatever possible way.

They went through preparations smoothly while in the infirmary, Byleth just hiding behind the wall and overhearing it with a smile on her face. In a question of minutes they had the entire thing planned, the when, the where and the how, with just a slight detail left out: baking a cake and other treats the princess would appreciate, which none of them had any idea about. 

Well, although the last thing Byleth wanted was to compromise hers and El’s cover, she was unable to stop herself from stepping into the room and offering some help in that regard. The two former songstresses, at first alarmed and unsure, realized they had nothing to lose and should count with the amazing bakers at the Blue Lions house, provided that Byleth managed to convince them to help. 

That was exactly what the professor had been doing in that break between classes. She had had lunch by herself in that day after telling Edelgard she wanted to go to the library and get some books, then tracked down Mercedes (who was in the training grounds with Dorothea, watching Ingrid beat Lorenz in a mock battle) and Annette, who was practicing magic with Lysithea in the garden in front of the Officers Academy. A brief explanation of what would transpire, as well as the promise to not tell on the students if they had to cook late at night not only then, but through the rest of the year, and her two bakers were on board with everything. 

Byleth quickly smiled to herself, making her back to the Dining Hall to an extra serving of grilled fish in order to celebrate that. There weren’t as many students there as she had thought there would be, with Edelgard nowhere to be found, and she went out of there with the snack in her hands, thinking about how nice it would be if that worked out. She knew the princess wasn’t fond of celebrating her own birthday, but well, maybe it was because she had never had a proper party amongst her peers before. Maybe this time it would be different and she wouldn’t hate any of them - least of all Byleth - for it. 

And if anything, at least she would have a nice cake and some desserts to go with it on the day that she was born; would anyone consider that something bad?

The professor bit into her fish, pondering over it as she walked into the Entrance Hall… and stopped altogether when she saw Dimitri talking to someone she had never seen before. 

He was tall and lanky, dressed in long greish robes with red and golden adornments. She couldn’t see his face, as his back was to her and she was peeking at Dimitri’s expression while hidden behind a pillar, but his hair was straight, dark brown and long, his demeanor and voice every bit as regal and imposing. There was an air about him that she disliked, even more so when she noticed how tense and uncertain the prince seemed to be when addressing him, answering questions and the such. 

_ “Ugh, I wish we could hear what they are saying,” _ Sothis whispered, as they were only able to catch some words amidst their slow, formal conversation.  _ “The little one doesn’t like it, though.” _

Byleth nodded, wondering if it was her place to interfere. She knew Dimitri could take care of himself very well, but there was something in his eyes which seemed a bit out of place. While different from what she had seen so far in some battles, it wasn’t too far off from that haze which clouded the blue of his irises then.

That was why she slowly, silent tiptoed to another pillar that stood closer to them and leaned in, widening her eyes when she realized it was indeed a lot easier to listen then.

“My dear niece’s birthday is in a few days, though unfortunately I shall not be here on the right date. Thus I have come to talk to her and offer a small gift of my appreciation beforehand.” He took a square, red medium-sized box from behind his back and motioned to it. “But alas, perhaps I could use this fateful encounter with my nephew to my own designs. Would you kindly give this to her in my stead when the actual day comes?”

Here Dimitri faltered, his beam polite yet practiced, merely the formality a noble paid another due to status and political matters. That was good, since it gave some time for Byleth’s brain to start dissecting what had just been said. Niece? Nephew? Dimitri had never said anything about having a sister and one that was studying in the Officers Academy too. But then… wouldn’t she know that girl in a sense? Or…

“Of course, Lord Arundel. I shall be more than happy to let Edelgard know of your intentions,” Dimitri answered a heartbeat later, putting all those thoughts in Byleth’s head to rest and also making them halt altogether.

It took a few seconds for Byleth to recognize that name, as it only sounded somewhat familiar at first. Then it hit her, a tidal wave that threatened not to drown her, but to enhance a feeling that had been festering inside her ever since she first heard Edelgard talking about the man.

_ “Volkhard von Arundel, El’s uncle,”  _ Byleth thought, anger rising and making her chest feel heavy with the added weight.  _ “Or the thing that has been passing as him.” _

It was a shame she couldn’t really see his face, then rush to add a punch to it. That would be the least he deserved after all he had made the princess go through. Her fury expanded, flames burning around and in her body, and she almost took a step forward if Sothis hadn’t stopped her, mumbled words meant to soothe and keep her in place. 

Unfortunately being in that state meant she lost the rest of that conversation, only coming back to herself once she heard steps and hid behind the pillar again, watching Arundel go the other way. 

She took a deep, cleansing breath after that and simply waited until the storm in her mind and the wish to do something stupid could subside. That was exactly why she was only able to walk when she realized Dimitri had moved and was coming her way. Unsure of how he would react, she sighed and came out of her hiding place, blocking his path, expression stoic and steady.

“Ah professor, you should have made your presence known before,” the prince exclaimed with an uneven voice, glancing away as if he had done something wrong. “I take it you have heard the conversation, then?”

“Most of it, yes.” It was a bluff, given that after that sentence she couldn’t remember a thing, but worth it all the same. She needed to know, if not for her own curiosity then for El’s sake. “Dimitri, who is he?”

“That man is the current Lord Regent to the Empire, Volkhard von Arundel. He is Edelgard’s uncle and has been standing in the Emperor’s place for a while,” he explained in a monotone, eyes wavering and seeking to hide.

“Yet he did call you his nephew as well.”

The silence that followed was uncomfortable, the prince’s grimace almost making her want to dismiss the question in order to spare him. She had to stand strong, or else those mysteries would only keep multiplying themselves instead of being solved.

“Edelgard’s mother was… my stepmother. She met my father while seeking exile in the Kingdom, years before the Empire was subjected to an upheaval. My own mother died when I was too young, but Lady Patricia treated me as if I were her child all the same. She was kind, smart, talented and incredibly beautiful." He beamed at the reminiscence, even if only for a small second. “Then one fateful day she was sent away from Fhirdiad, a week or so before I met Edelgard herself.”

He continued, telling a tale of how the two kids had danced and played together, enjoyed some time in innocent friendship before Edelgard returned to the Empire. Byleth was barely paying attention, wondering why she had missed on all of that - or rather, why El didn’t seem to actually recall it. 

“Things got a lot worse in the years that followed her leaving, culminating on an episode known as the Tragedy of Duscur in which many Kingdom nobles were killed. Including… my father and stepmother." He hung his head, stopped, hands balled into fists and shaking with the emotion he had been trying to contain. “I have… wanted to discuss this with you for a while, professor. Those are the… ghosts that I listen to sometimes. I was there, I saw the massacre, the blood and the fire -”

“It’s ok, Dimitri.” She gently took his hand, squeezing it, just as she did to soothe Edelgard whenever she was upset and trapped in the past again. “You’re not there anymore.”

He sighed, shook his head. As if not completely believing her as of then. “It is hard to distinguish at times. Or to understand why I was spared when so many others died. My family, knights, tutors, friends… That was when Felix’s brother was murdered, too, fighting people with gruesome masks and something more than unhuman about them. And no, despite the name that episode was given, I do not believe this was the work of the people of Duscur,” he added, lifting his head to look at her eyes, a passionate fire now upon his own. “Those enemies were… someone else. Something else, actually.”

His last words made a shiver run down her spine. “Are you looking for vengeance, Dimitri?” Her voice was flat, unbiased, something that visibly put him at ease since his hands relaxed at last. 

“The whole point of me coming to the Officers Academy was to get my revenge. I do wish to become a better fighter, yes, but I feel like this place harbors too many secrets and answers that could be useful to me.” He was emotionless as well, but she could see his irises burning up with a violence not unlike what she had witnessed in the mock battle. “The dead still call to me, you know. I can hear their voices, their screams of agony and pleads for death to come, for that torture to stop. They want their peace and they won’t attain that until I have made the real perpetrators pay for their crimes.”

She could partially empathize with that, with being the sole survivor of something that big and feel guilty about it. It was a feeling she had seen etched in a different face, one that she loved. 

“You have been searching, then.” His nod was a mere confirmation that hadn’t really been needed - Byleth had seen the prince walking around the library at night sometimes, but had neither pried nor offered her assistance. Now that she knew the nature of his issues, however, she had a feeling both her and a certain Imperial princess could be of help. “I can aid you if you want, but regardless… Dimitri, the past won’t rest if you keep holding it so close to your heart. Perhaps those ghosts would be a lot happier if you let them go, if you lived your own life instead of theirs.”

He grimaced at that, almost took a step back. Had she gone too far?

“I know, truly. It is just tough to when - Ah, never mind that, professor. I think we will be late for class if we don’t get going, though,” he cut his sentence short, not exactly wanting to share that last detail, the last words his father had uttered while alive. He turned to go and was glad when she followed in silence, perhaps finally giving up on that trail of thoughts. 

Once they were in front of the Blue Lions classroom, however, she grabbed his forearm in order to stop him and said before getting in, leaving him no time to reply to that: “I think you should talk to Edelgard about your past together and her mother, Dimitri. She would like hearing about it, I’m sure. And also, I hope you know that you don’t have to shoulder all of this alone. I’ll be here to talk if you need to.”

* * *

To say that little discussion with her House Leader had given Byleth some food for thought was an understatement. Throughout lectures she kept thinking about it, about how little she knew about the so-called Tragedy of Duscur aside from a mention or another in some recent history books she had read. The fact that Dimitri's eyes remained veiled and he seemed to be far afield just added to it. 

She recalled his description of the attackers, how it had stirred something familiar inside her too. Her glance kept going to the gift box that had been neatly tucked underneath his desk the moment he got in the classroom, his blank stare deflecting any and all attempts at jeers and questions about it from his weary peers.

They knew what it meant when he had that look on his face. They would rather steer far from him (aside from Dedue of course) and were glad that wasn't a practice day too. 

The moment lessons ended and everyone had left the room, Byleth gathered her books and materials, going straight to the library without stopping for a quick break. She wanted to learn more about the whole ordeal, about what Dimitri had witnessed and what had marked so many of her students' pasts.

Her steps were harried and she avoided making small talk along the way, smiling and nodding to whoever she saw idling by or on their way somewhere else. On her haste she almost ran over Annette and Lysithea on the stairs, probably going the same way she was. She apologized and halted her steps, matching theirs and overhearing the intricate discussion on magical theory she seemed so many years away from mastering. 

Once they did reach what looked like an empty library, Byleth was advised not to sit with them since they would be practicing some magic and the results could be… explosive. The fact that they picked up a rather charred table as far away from shelves as they could only added to the impact of that sentence and made the professor look at them with awe. In any case, she preferred the object of her research to remain a secret too and took a different table from them. 

Soon enough she was almost invisible behind stacks of books, not only on the recent history of Fódlan but also whatever she could find about dreams and connections between people - though those weren't as common. She read, took notes as fast as she could and occasionally raised her head to watch as the two little mages either got into a heated argument about theorems or hooted in success at whatever spell they had been trying out. 

Those two had good dynamics, which made her miss Edelgard's presence there for a moment. But then she shook her head, knowing the princess was busy and the last thing she wanted was to overwhelm her with more studying anyways. So she got lost in her books, noting the difference between how authors treated the Tragedy of Duscur, the events which led to it and who to blame for everything. 

It was exasperating not to have a consensus and, what was worse, so many different opinions on the same matter. Add to that how little she got on dreams beside dream interpretation books and she was more than just a bit hopeless about either subject once she was done skimming through those books 

By the time she looked up from what was probably one of the last volumes on her pile, she blinked and realized she was alone in the candlelit library. Flames cast eerie shadows over empty tables and the shelves, over her as well. The stairs beside her felt like something out of a dream, encased by light and darkness as it was.

Byleth even had a second to wonder if she was indeed asleep, but a book dropping on her foot as she failed to properly handle it was enough to convince her it wasn't the case. She winced and was about to go down and grab it when steps approached her and someone knelt, getting the volume for her. 

"Are you ok? It is a pretty hefty book to drop like that."

The professor smiled, recognizing that voice and shaking her head. "Yeah, I was just careless. And tired of finding no answers." 

There was a hum of agreement, then Edelgard sat on the bench beside her, lilac irises shining under the candlelight. "Is there anything I can help you with? And sorry for coming over like that, I stopped by your room before and you weren't there, so…" the princess stopped and blushed, as if she had done something awful.

"It's ok, El. I'm glad you're here," Byleth smiled, placing a hand on her knee and squeezing it in reassurance. "But no, I don't think you can help me. Unless you know something about why we've connected in dreams."

The girl stopped, looked around to make sure there really wasn't anyone else in the library and sighed, shaking her head. "I don't. And likewise, it is not because I haven't done any research either," she confessed, eyes troubled. "I wonder if someone else has experienced this before, but that is not something you ask others without proper context."

"Agreed, I've thought about it but well, I don't know if other people would talk openly about that. Dreams are really intimate and sharing them with others is… powerful." She summed it up, unsure if she'd be able to say it otherwise. "I'm glad we have this and for that long too."

"I can only say the same, By." Edelgard shifted closer to the former mercenary, lying her head on her shoulder. "At first I wondered if it had something to do with my crest, but honestly that feels unlikely. You can reach me in dreams as much as I can reach you, though you lack a crest of your own "

Byleth frowned, stopped herself from agreeing the moment she recalled something that had happened a few days ago. "Wait, I think I might have one." Edelgard turned to look at her, no longer lying on her shoulder. Her forehead was creased, lined with worry and surprise. "Well according to Hanneman I do. He's been researching it, something about it being a rare crest or the likes."

The fact that she shrugged as if it was unimportant did nothing to dispel Edelgard's shock. Had she seen Byleth's crest activate at any time? No, not in the mock battle nor before in Remire. But then, they hadn't fought together that much to begin with - and El herself kept her second crest a secret for her safety.

She couldn't ignore the end of that sentence or how something in her blood vibrated with recognition, with power that wasn't supposed to be there to begin with. 

"By? Would you... trust me to check something?" Edelgard whispered, opening her palms in a silent invitation. 

Sensing the importance of that moment, Byleth solemnly placed her hands on the princess's and waited for any command at all. 

None was necessary though, as a second later she felt a surge of power course through her lover and herself at the same time. Lively purple flames encased their joined palms, growing stronger once the initial wariness over it was gone. 

For a few minutes they just watched, transfixed, unaware that someone else that had crawled from the deepest parts of the library was also enjoying that spectacle - and everything else that he had heard before, too. As the two broke contact and started questioning why Byleth also had the Crest of Flames, twin to the one that had been forced on Edelgard, Solon crept back to the hidden, forbidden shelves, thinking about what an interesting development he would report to Thales as soon as they met that night. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I remember reading somewhere that Dorothea's supports with girls were mostly very soft, whereas she was a lot harsher when it came to noble guys xD here I just wanted her and Edelgard to not have a great start from the beginning, even if later on they'll become closer to each other. 
> 
> The scene with the crest of flames was one that had been planned for version one of this fic, but ended up not making the cut. There you have it tho.
> 
> I hope you guys are enjoying it and have a great weekend!


	6. The Weight of Convictions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edelgard is taken to a birthday party that she isn't too happy about at first, only to relax as the night progresses.
> 
> Later on, Byleth and the Blue Lions have to deal with Lonato's rebellion, something that has been brewing for a while and elicits all sorts of reactions from them.

Edelgard had stopped enjoying her own birthdays ever since she was taken underground and her life was turned upside down. Before, those days were seen as very important in the Hresvelg household, what with how many kids there were and how each and every single one of them was treated as a unique, amazing individual that deserves to be celebrated. Hence birthday parties had been plenty and joyous for everyone involved, as gifts, incredible food, good music and some dancing would go well into the night and the next day at times.

Afterwards, when Edelgard had been the only child to remain, such occasions had lost their meaning, their happiness, their reason to be. Sure, Ionius had kept giving her little gifts, small things that Arundel would allow him to get her, and there would be some sort of festivities in her honor, but those were just painful reminders of what had once been. The laughter and silliness shared between siblings then turned into formal dances and speeches to other nobles who were more than likely interested in marrying their children to the future Emperor one day.

Such days had disgusted Edelgard and made her want to disappear, to the point she was visibly relieved at the thought of being away from the palace at her birthday in that year. It would mean no party, no chance for some noble kid or another to try courting her or asking her for a dance, only for her to comply out of duty or to do her uncle's bidding. 

So when Dorothea had gone to her room in the evening, just as she was about to put on her sleeping gown and call it a day, then got a hold of her hand and pulled her away to the first floor, she was incredibly uncomfortable, heart racing and protesting that motion - and not because they were breaking curfew, either.

"What in the name of all heavens do you think you are doing?" Edelgard hissed once they paused in the bottom of the stairs, her companion looking sideways more than once before they could press on. 

"Making sure we're not caught, silly," the brunette winked at her, a cheeky, excited smile on her face. Just as Dorothea's approach to her, the weather had started becoming warmer, the change more than welcome for both girls especially on that night.

One that was for celebrating, for putting into practice what she, Manuela, Mercedes and Annette had sent into motion a few days ago with Byleth's help. 

As they tiptoed around other rooms, stopping here and there to be sure they weren't being watched, Dorothea giggled at her friend's inquisitive expression, then internally grimaced at how at ease and good the princess had seemed all day, with no one even acknowledging that it was a cause for celebrating. She had expected someone like Edelgard to feel and look gloomy at that, since the day went by and nobody even mentioned a birthday and the likes. Yet it had been the other way around, with her smiling, looking carefree and comfortable.

It had made the former songstress curious about her, about the reasons for that and what was hiding at the mist that seemed to be the princess's past. They had started talking a bit more and Dorothea was surprised when Edie hugged her the moment she spoke about living in the streets, being sent there due to the lack of a crest and her somewhat noble origins. It wasn't the answer she had been expecting, true, but it made her feel seen in a way that was new, good and warm.

Now she wanted to repay Edelgard for that as well as to show that she could be trusted. And what better way to do that than with a party, one that was waiting in her room and came with amazing food, some friends and gifts?

"Please do come in," Dorothea said once they had stopped in front of her quarters, a weary princess frowning and opening her mouth to question it. "Shhh, don't make me stay out here for too long, we don't want Seteth to see us. Just open the damn door, Edie!"

Coaxed by the sheer, scary excitement in her voice (and the nickname she had recently gotten to go along with it), Edelgard fumbled with the knob, was eventually able to turn it and step inside the darkened room-

That a second later became too bright once two or more people used Fire spells to light a dozen candles at once, while fiercely whispering "happy birthday, Edelgard!"

She froze at the doorstep, lilac eyes wide and unfocused, heart racing first with fright at the sudden movements, then weariness. So people  _ had  _ known it was her birthday, they had just been waiting for the right occasion to congratulate her. 

Gentle hands found their way to her back, pushing her forward so both she and Dorothea could go inside and the door would be closed. The first thing she saw were the faces that greeted her, the cheery smiles beautifully adorning Manuela's, Annette's, Mercedes's and Lysithea's expressions as if the party were for them. Luckily no one was offended by her taken aback state and each came forward to hug her and offer nice words as she mentally took stock of what was going on. On why there were little pots of saghert and cream, sweet buns, fruits and small cakes she had never seen before sprawled over Dorothea's bed, or fine porcelain cups, a kettle and the distinguishable smell of bergamot tea on the table. 

"I- I don't really know what to say," Edelgard uttered once Lysithea disentangled from her after a warm, caring embrace that seemed at odds with the image of the prodigious, scathing mage she had heard about. "Thank you, of course but… this wasn't necessary, really."

"Pfff darling, of course it was," Manuela answered, standing against the wall to her right, delighted at how that had been a success. Sure, she wished the girl would loosen up a bit and that she didn't look so alarmed, but the small smile on her lips had to be a start. "You've been working hard and deserve a party, plus it is your day so, why not?"

"A certain someone that isn't here yet put me and Annie up to cooking and honestly, how could I say no to attending it as well?" Mercedes said with a kind beam, then picked up a serving of saghert and cream and offered it to the princess. "Please tell me what you think, I've heard that there's a different version of this in the Empire and I wonder how you'll like this recipe."

_ A certain someone that wasn't there yet. _ It didn't take a genius to figure out who it was. Of course she had done something like that, despite Edelgard saying it wouldn't be needed. She sighed, rubbing her temples with the hand that wasn't holding the treat, then tasted it and couldn't help but beam at the amazing dessert. 

"This is incredible, Mercedes. Thank you so much, you didn't have to go to all that trouble and -"

"Oh hush, I still owe you one for gently hitting me in the mock battle. I saw how…  _ fiercely _ you and the Professor fought later on." That of course made the entire room giggle and Edelgard blush, but it was enough to melt the strange, awkward mood between people who hadn't really talked before.

"We've organized a system so everyone can come and go without crowding and destroying my humble abode," Dorothea informed the princess a few seconds later, once people started talking between themselves and Edelgard tried a sweet bun trio, equally delighted at how good it was. "So don't think we'll be the only ones to congratulate you tonight."

"Dorothea, I… you are too kind." El pulled her in what was supposed to be a short embrace, only to caress her back, closing her eyes in order to keep a tear back. Never had she felt so overwhelmed in a good way in her own parties, the contrast between that one and those her uncle had thrown in her name were so starkly clear that they were actually opposites.

And yes, she definitely preferred the small, cozier one with people that she was getting to meet at Garreg Mach, plus the amazing cooking that, although not as fancy, was way tastier and evoked a feeling of love within her.

While people came and went, with Mercedes and then Annette (to Lysithea's dismay, who almost pouted at that since they were having a nice discussion before) being substituted by Ferdinand and Ingrid, Edelgard got more and more hugs, a small pile of gifts and a growing warmth within her heart, one that she couldn't remember ever being there before. 

Slowly she let herself go and became more Edelgard, less the future Emperor and wielder of a war that was looming in the horizon. More the eighteen-year-old girl she just was, less the perfect weapon that had been forged by others at the expense of her family and childhood. More a student who was smiling at her own improvised birthday party than the one who bore the responsibility to change that world they lived in.

The moment the door opened again to let in Byleth and Dimitri, she saluted them with the kindest beams, surprising the prince and making the professor look a lot more relieved at it. 

"Happy birthday, Edelgard," Dimitri said, awkwardly placing his hands around the smaller girl in an embrace. He had meant to bow in salute, but the cheery atmosphere in Dorothea's room asked for more.

It had been weird to have Byleth knock on his quarters that late, then even weirder when she informed him of where they were going - then added in a whisper, when he said he had nothing more than the gift that Arundel had asked him to give her: "You want to give her something good? Help her remember your time together as kids. Trust me, she'll cherish this more than anything else."

He had wanted to ask how she knew that and if the rumors about Byleth and Edelgard being… more than friends were true. Not that he had anything at all to do with it, but it would elicit too many questions and make things off-putting for both the princess and his teacher. Instead, he had sighed, fidgeted with the box in his hands and said he'd give it a try.

Hugging Edelgard, or at least that Edelgard that seemed to be a lot more open and merrier than he had ever seen her during their time in the Officers Academy, felt like coming home, like remembering that time when they were little and he tripped over a rock, only to be steadied by her arms. Once they pulled away and he stammered, offering her the gift on his hands and explaining that it was from her uncle, it was almost unbearable to watch her lilac eyes become hooded for a second longer, or hear the formality on her voice as she thanked him and settled the box to the side of the room. 

Luckily her better mood came back once Byleth placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed it, the act one of camaraderie instead of intimacy, though if one were to look in their eyes they would see the true bond between them, right there.

For a second that unsettled Dimitri, as if that would be his downfall, his doom. The image of a golden sword and a gilded axe coming in his direction flashed behind his eyes, only to be dismissed when Edelgard pulled away from the professor and told them to grab something to eat.

"There is plenty of food for an army, so do help yourselves," El beamed, motioning at the mattress that was still covered in treats. "And my teacher, we shall talk about this later," she added in a whisper meant only for the one beside her. "But thank you, truly. I might have mentally chastised and cursed you a few moments ago but… this is more than I could have asked for."

"You deserve the best, El," Byleth mumbled back, then briefly brushed grabbed her hand before going for a sweet bun. A second later Manuela pulled her into an embrace, a thank you and a heated conversation on those students. 

As bad as it was to admit something like that, the former mercenary could barely pay attention to what Manuela was saying, even more so when the issue shifted to the diva's clandestine parties while at the Mittelfrank, though she had to smile once or twice when Dorothea chimed in - El had told her a bit about her classmate's past so she knew enough to not be surprised as to why she and Manuela seemed to be so close. 

However, it was easy to get distracted and watch over the rest of the room, Byleth's eyes falling way too often on Edelgard, who was talking a little bit to everyone and offering the vaguest descriptions of other parties she had been to while in the palace; on Lysithea, who was glancing at El as if she wanted to say something but didn't have the courage to do so; on Dimitri, who had a similar expression on his face and stayed beside Dorothea's study table the whole time, unsure of how to proceed; on Petra, who has recently arrived and stood beside Dorothea and finally on Ingrid, who blushed too much whenever Thea addressed her.

There was so much going on without words being said, making Byleth wonder if those students even realized it was the case, if they were aware of how their bodies and faces spoke a language of their own, a language she could read and interpret as clearly as if they were shouting at her. And while she knew it wasn't her place to meddle and be sure to solve all of those issues, she surely wanted to try. 

Starting with the prince, her own student, the one she had personally dragged from his room and wanted both him and Edelgard to make amends. To recall easier, better times before the distinct storms that had taken over their lives later on. But for that, well, he would need to stop staying on the sidelines and actually do something. 

At first she raised an eyebrow at him while Manuela went on about a date gone wrong, one in which she ended up having to pretend that Dorothea was her own child since the noble she had met was just too obnoxious and rude - and of course, hated kids. Dimitri shrugged, shook his head and looked pained, eyes downcast and veiled, defeated. As if he had lost the battle even before it had begun. 

Somehow that miffed her, to the point that she tilted her head in Edelgard's direction, a clear enough indication on what she thought he should do - and the boy knew better than to disagree with her, after all. Hence he sighed, heart hammering on his chest as he wondered what exactly he was supposed to do or say to get what he wanted, to make sure she remembered their shared past. 

The opportunity arrived when Byleth interrupted Manuela's tale and asked what she thought about singing alongside Dorothea, as every party deserved some music and that one shouldn't be an exception - even if they were to chant as quietly as possible in fear of calling attention to themselves. The two former divas shared a glance full of care, the memories of what felt like a lifetime ago for them returning at full. Ones that were about the last duet they had sung together at the stages of the Mittelfrank, the one that had marked Manuela's farewell. 

They turned to Byleth and nodded with big smiles on their faces. Their eyes shone with happiness, thanking her for the opportunity to reunite through music again.

For a second there was silence, then the small quarters were filled with a lilting, incredible melody that surrounded everyone and made them stare at the two in awe. Byleth stepped aside, glanced pointedly at Dimitri and waited, glad to see everyone was enjoying that.

The prince understood what that was, the gift the professor had given him in that small moment. He had told her that Edelgard was his first dance teacher, so it was just fitting that through motion and sound she might remember those days a bit better, right? The only way to know was to try and so he did, gracefully stepping in front of the Imperial princess, who had been glancing at her professor and classmate with wonder, and extended her a hand, a silent invitation.

One that was first taken with raised brows before being accepted with a police bow. 

"How has your day been?" Dimitri inquired when they naturally fell into position and simply swayed to the music, to the delight of those who watched and even more so to professor Byleth. He mentally rolled his eyes at her, heart still frantic due to the impact of what he'd try to attempt and his fear that it could fail. The one thing he'd congratulate himself for was keeping his voice steady, as it had been happening so far.

"It went smoothly, thank you. And yours?" She did her best not to frown at how clumsy the prince seemed to be at dancing, even though as a noble it was almost a given that he had had classes. 

So why was he almost stepping at her toes every time, almost letting her lead and using his left to initiate movements instead? Such rookie mistakes couldn't be natural-

For a second she thought she saw and felt something, the pull of much brighter, innocent blue eyes, shinier blond hair under the setting sun, a cold breeze on her skin and a distant setting behind her. But it couldn't be, could it?

"It was good. I didn't know that there was a party being planned and apologies for the lack of a gift from me. I hope the one from your uncle is sufficient for both of us," he mumbled, looking down and repeating the same mistakes he used to do as a child, the ones she would scathingly correct no matter if the hour was late and they should be going back to the palace as well. He had seen something pass through her eyes, a faint glimmer between a convoluted haze. Maybe given more time…

"Do not concern yourself with that." The laugh that followed was soft, almost a giggle with the actual happiness he could hear within it. One that turned into concern, then disbelief when he made a very bad mistake. "Dimitri, you're supposed to lead with your… right."

Her voice, at first simply stating a fact, slowly diminished as the images from before consolidated. She heard her younger self uttering the same words with more authority behind it and impatience too, that sentence repeated not once or twice, but at least ten times until the little prince had understood and finally taken her serious about it too. 

Her eyes widened, surprised, unrooted. If she closed them she was sure she would feel grass under her feet while they danced, a song they both crooned to guide their steps, the setting sun over their skin and the chilly wind caressing their faces. She knew the room with her party would turn into Fhirdiad, its woods and mountains, the almost unbearable winter she'd gone through while in there. 

And although she knew what had come next, the brutality to which she had been subjected after that year in the Kingdom, the moment when she and Dimitri laughed at their shared past, it didn't matter as much. 

What did, what she thanked first the prince, then Byleth for (once she found out in dreams that it had been her who arranged for them to get together like that) was that she had recovered a good memory. A jewel amidst the gloomy, unbearable idea that her past had been nothing but a series of misfortune and pain, that as a kid she hadn't had a reason to smile or laugh.

Now that a small part of the haze which clouded her mind when it came to her own story had been lifted, Edelgard felt truly free, more in touch with who she was instead of what others had made her believe that she was. 

That night, once she was finally back in her room after a hasty slice of heavenly bergamot cake, El used the dream to show Byleth the memory she had reacquainted herself with while dancing with Dimitri in her party. She had thought the most beautiful gift was that, recalling lost, scattered parts of herself again. 

But surely nothing beat seeing the wide, victorious smile in her lover's face either, as they sat down together and leaned against a tree on the edges of the castle of Fhirdiad, watching a younger version of Dimitri dance with a strict, brown-haired Edelgard. 

* * *

"It's worse than I thought."

The words still echoed inside Byleth's head as she walked through the mist and tried making sense of what was going on. Having low visibility wasn't that of an issue to a mercenary that had grown up fighting in the middle of the night, using darkness as an element of surprise to snatch enemies before they could see Jeralt and his peers. 

It was another thing altogether when the warriors beside her were neither that seasoned nor used to not having their eyes to rely on. 

"Keep your ears open and trust your intuition," she had told them before they had to go into the fog, so dense that Byleth was sure that it couldn't be natural. She'd been in the middle of hazes before and knew how that felt.

What they were facing was something else and she thanked Edelgard for telling her about the whole ordeal before.

It had been a tumultuous dream, the night before Byleth was supposed to march into Kingdom territory and put a stop to a strike that had been going on for too long, eventually reaching the Oghma Mountains and Rhea's ears. Of course the archbishop hadn't been happy with that, even more when she heard about what was being said of her, and ordered the professor and her class to move at once.

Which had made Edelgard sneer the moment Byleth told her about it, during their shared dream since they were doing their best to avoid suspicion and be seen too close together during the day. The last thing they needed was for others to laugh and wonder about them, more than they already did ever since the mock battle. 

"The slithers are behind this," the princess had said while pacing around the dream projection of her own quarters in Garreg Mach. "They have been telling Lonato to rebel, reminding him of losing his son after Duscur and how little mind the church paid to them - and the Kingdom as a whole, all things considered. Surely Dimitri and his family deserved more after years of loyalty to the esteemed Church of Seiros."

Byleth had chuckled at the blatant disdain in her voice, yet her eyes were serious and demanded for her to go on.

"I… tried convincing Lonato to my - our - cause. But grief runs deep and the slithers used that to manipulate him so. He was deaf to my pleas." El's demeanor was downcast at that, defeat etched at her features. It was a battle she wished she hadn't lost. "So I ask you, please spare him if you can. He is nothing but another person who has gotten entangled in their schemes, and to a bad end, too.

"Also, would you please tell me if you ever see or find something suspicious on the battlefield?"

The professor has been intrigued by that last request, but accepted it nonetheless and said she'd do her best to keep him alive. Not that Rhea would agree, but she didn't exactly care about the distant archbishop and the strange premonition she had whenever the two were forced to be close together. 

Something about flames, about big, white wings… and destruction all around them, though the image always came and went so fast Byleth wasn't able to make out more details about it. 

"Professor, to your right!"

She jumped out of place just in time to avoid a fireball, then nodded to Ashe, who stood beside her with a grim, twisted expression. His face was pale, paler than ever, and his eyes were distant in a way that she had never seen before. It was tough for him to latch and launch his arrows given how tense his shoulders and arms were, something she had noted ever since they left the monastery.

He had denied it when Byleth asked if he wanted to be left behind, to not participate in that battle against his own stepfather, the man who had taken him and his siblings out of the streets and into a luxurious house, seeing them as his own children. Changing their lives for the better in a way they had never imagined before.

Now Ashe was there, eyes darting through the mist, trying to get at least a glimpse of that kind-hearted man in order to gauge what was really going on. What had changed Lonato so, that he would raise his voice against the church and all that it stood for.

Because the alternative, one that Byleth knew and was somewhat hesitant to tell him, was that the church was wrong and not Lonato. 

All in its due time, though. No good would come out of rushing him through something like that, or asking the boy to consider an idea so opposed to what he had believed for so long. Regardless, she hoped that it wouldn't take a drastic measure in order to make him look at things a bit differently than before.

Knowing that Ashe would probably follow her lead no matter where she went, Byleth did her best to dance away from the villagers that attacked them, another surprise. No one had said a word about the "army" that was slithering through the mists, their lacking battle skills visible by the wide swings of their weapons and the way they tired easily, panting and urging themselves on no matter how gloomy the situation was. 

It was clear they prided themselves on their convictions, in the weight behind their cause, behind lord Lonato and all he had told them about the church of Seiros. On how wrong Rhea and her abusive power were, her almost complete dominion over Fódlan that was in place not because she had taken up weapons and fought for it, but by how her word was almost law - and those who defied it were put to the sword. 

That moment was enough to illustrate that, though Byleth did her best to not let it be the case. She dodged attacks more than retaliated and when she did, she held back and stroke at specific points that would make the villagers in front of her just faint, losing consciousness for long enough if one would try seeing if they were dead. What with Catherine and that strange, eerie weapon around… she would rather not take chances.

She would rather not stand out to that member of the Knight of Seiros, one that seemed to be way too close to Rhea and would probably tell on her if she did something strange - like not disposing of enemies who had spoken against the archbishop to begin with. Hence Byleth danced through the haze, actually grimacing when Catherine found and murdered the one responsible for that. A mage hidden behind the darkest robes she had ever seen and a mask too, the magic he wielded too alien to what she had been teaching and learning at Garreg Mach, though somehow she could recall an echo of it in a distant past.

On one hand, she would rather not be so exposed, her acts of avoidance and her unwillingness to finish those who crumbled in front of her now shown for everyone to see. Catherine did and her face flashed with anger for more than just a second, eyes motioning for her to plunge her sword into the villager who was kneeling in front of her, an elderly man who whispered of lord Lonato and his ideas, of his truth. 

Defying orders from someone who clearly wasn't her superior, she lightly hit him on the temples with the hilt of her sword and moved away, more than glad to see her students picking up on what she had just done and changing tactics too. Their faces visibly relaxed as well, once they were free to not kill in the name of an organization that seemed to loom over all of them. To not have more blood on their hands, because someone else said they should. 

And no matter how Catherine and her Knights of Seiros would push, fighting with abandon and anger in their eyes at what that strike represented, they weren't enough to subdue and eliminate all the villagers that had gathered to stand against those who they didn't believe in. It made that battle an actual clash of ideals, of convictions and half truths that had been hidden for too long. 

And if that was just a small sample that Byleth was getting of what would happen once Edelgard declared her war…

The one thing she could do was hope that it wouldn't be like that. That no side would have to be forced to eliminate everything and everyone standing on the opposing corner. A look at her Blue Lions, the mercy they were serving on those who tried stabbing them with small swords and pitchforks, and she wondered what side they would be on.

If they would yet again follow her into battle, once a student from another House blamed the church for keeping in a system based on myths and legends that had no place in this day and age. Byleth had heard some of their stories, she thought as she raced through the battlefield, sidestepping a woman and child who attempted to sway at her with a knife. She was sure some of her kids weren't as keen about crests as others, but then...

She shook her head the moment there was a gasp to her side and turned just in time to notice Ashe halting to a stop. A shadow fell over them and she instinctively placed herself in front of her student, knees bent, sword to her side, her eyes widening once she realized how only faint sounds of battle were reaching them, how far away from the others they were.

And how the one person facing them was none other than Lonato himself, his grey hair shining under the scant light that fell on him, the grim dullness on his eyes and the sad smile on his lips. He was sitting over a beautiful white horse that was looking at them and huffing, ready to run them over if it was necessary. The animal's demeanor was completely the opposite of the one shown by the man, though. 

"We meet again, Ashe," he said, eyes and voice contrite as if he'd rather be anywhere else but there. 

"Lonato, why? What's the meaning of this?" The boy behind Byleth pleaded, not at once motioning for her to go away. His own tone was forlorn rather than angry or righteous, something she had heard from Catherine and the other knights on their way there. He didn't want to be there, or to do that. To be that sort of knight at the very least.

Byleth wished she could tell him there was no reason to go on with that.

"I am quite certain of my reasons, dear one, though I will not ask you to listen to me or reconsider. There is too much darkness lying in the church of Seiros. Too many quests for power, demands for complete subservience." He stopped, sighed, irises burning with anger regarding what he was to say next. "And that woman who leads it… she has forgotten the meaning of what a true religion is."

"Stop this already! What would you of all people get with squabbling with the church?" His voice warbled, yet for the first time in a long while he touched his bow, bringing it forward with an arrow at the notch. "Why are you doing this?!"

Lonato shook his head and sighed, defeated before the battle could even start. As if he had known he would not live to see the end of that day, or the end of that conversation to begin with. 

As if that had been the plan all along.

"Very well then, you leave me no choice. The strength of our beliefs will determine who shall be the winner."

At that Byleth stood guard, letting her body flow into an offensive position as the man in front of her got a good grip on his lance. Yet before both of them were even ready she heard the distinct, cutting sound of an arrow leaving its bow, followed by a grunt once it hit its mark. 

More followed in a rapid succession, faster than she had ever seen Ashe attack before. The boy's face was screwed up in a silent scream, eyes shining with tears that were spilled and ran down his cheeks, just as Lonato's blood came from wound after wound. At first it wasn't enough to stop him and he did turn his horse around, aiming it and his lance at them. 

However, something made him hesitate at the last possible minute, his face softening once before another arrow hit him and he grunted, falling from the animal that ended up collapsing over him. 

The professor was keen to hold her student's arm, restraining him from going and seeing what had happened, what he had done, the second realization flooded his green eyes and he finally seemed to understand everything that had transpired in the last few minutes. Wordless, unsure and doubting that saying anything would be of help, Byleth shook her head while grimacing, squeezed Ashe's forearm and led him away, at the exact time that they both heard approaching steps coming from a clearing nearby. 

Behind them, lying in a pool of convictions and words that weren't as surreal as Rhea and Catherine had made everyone else believe, Lonato breathed his last apology and curse, willing that one day the church of Seiros would be rightfully exposed and no one would have to suffer like he had. 

Even if that meant carrying forward the plans of those who had hurt him when it was too late, the moment he noticed the truth behind Edelgard's letters and the actual nature of those who were pretending to be members of the Western Church.

"Where is - oh you've uh… dealt with him already, I see," Catherine mumbled once she took stock of the professor and her student, then the body behind them. "The rest of your class is dealing with the remaining villagers and they have orders to  _ not  _ let them escape alive. Please join them, I'll make sure Lonato is really gone."

Byleth bristled at the order, the authority behind Catherine's voice and the sure way in which she moved. Once she got to the corpse on the floor, tossing it aside to be picked apart with carelessness, the former mercenary's expression hardened and she took Ashe away for good, mindful of the way he had started shaking after the deal was done. 

It was too easy to defy the command that hadn't been the Knight's to give. To tell her students in angry whispers that Lonato has been dealt with and it would be senseless murder to just dispose of villagers who believed in their cause, in what they were fighting for.

And it was a relief to be obeyed, to see remorse that had been carved in their eyes ebbing away once their hands were no longer to be washed with blood. There was no honor in battling against enemies that didn't know how to fight back, to defend themselves and actually use weapons. So the Blue Lions relented and put up a show just like they had done before, while urging in whispers for their opponents to run and hide. 

When Catherine and the Knights of Seiros were back, a bloodied piece of paper in her hands, the battlefield was covered in still bodies that breathed as shallow as they could and nothing moved except for the students, who were healing each other and discussing the outcomes in hushed tones.

"You did well, Professor. Glad to see you and your class in action too." To say that the blonde's voice was dripping sarcasm was an understatement, though her eyes seemed to relent once she saw most of the militia lying on the cold, hard floor. "But maybe this entire thing was way more than just a strike or whatever." 

The group marched back to Garreg Mach discussing the so-called assassination letter that had been found in Lonato's clothing, barely concealed, almost as if it wanted to be found and had been the endgoal of it all. 

As blatant as it was, maybe that was the right of it, Byleth mused, a hand still lingering on Ashe's shoulder. They walked behind the rest of her students and the Knights; she didn't want him to be exposed to judgement from others and had felt some of the church people giving him pointed stares, as if expecting him to rebel just like his stepfather had. The notion was odd to her, though it was good to see how his friends had closed ranks around the distraught boy, keeping him safe too. 

She made a mental note to discuss that with Edelgard, even more so since she knew the slithers had been behind that - and what were the chances that they were also responsible for the letter? Not that she believed in it, but -

"Professor, it looks like you have a lot on your mind."

She turned to see Dimitri looking at her with a respectful, caring expression on his face. Somehow this time his eyes hadn't shifted, nor had his demeanor during the battle. If nothing, he had been the first to follow her lead and not harm the villagers any further than necessary, mostly staying frozen and looking ahead, unresponsive. 

"I could say the same. Is everything ok?" She shot back in a gentle tone, wondering if her words had been too blunt when he tensed for a second.

"Y-yes, I was just wondering about this entire mission, all things considered." That was said in a whisper; there was a considerable distance between the students and the Knights of Seiros as of then, since Catherine and hers had strolled on ahead in a hurry, probably worried about the archbishop. That didn't mean they weren't couldn't be overheard though.

"It did feel a little bit… unnecessary, didn't it?" Sylvain asked, as suddenly she and Ashe were surrounded by the others and the silent boy was solaced with small whispers and a squeeze of his shoulder. "They believed in something, they rebelled against not being able to do so. But to be eliminated like that?"

"They did call Lady Rhea some very bad names, if I remember correctly," Mercedes said, rubbing her palm as a wind spell had hit her there. "They said she was an usurper who had been in power for too long, or something. That doesn't even make any sense."

"Yeah, it's weird. Everything about this is weird," Annette lamented, then noticed how her friend was picking at her hand and held it, allowing some healing magic to course through her fingers. "I'm uh… not as good with this as you, but maybe it'll help." 

"Nonsense, dear, you're the best mage I know. Thank you." Mercedes leaned in and petted Annie's red locks with affection, as the forest surrounded them and they followed another trail out of that village, one that would soon take them to the mountains. 

The woods were gloomy, but not as much as their moods. There was something distasteful and angry seething around and between them, something that went beyond the emotions that had arisen due to the assignment they had just completed in a very messy way. And no matter how much they tried softening that atmosphere with some light jokes and banter, it didn't help at all. 

"Professor? If they ever find out we didn't exactly kill those villagers, what will happen to us?" Ingrid queried, as she had also been one of the first to scowl at Catherine's orders and attitude, her heart revolting against the sight of a knight like her acting so unfairly. 

So unlike the knights that Ingrid loved and wanted to be, one day. 

"I'll make sure you're safe if that's the case," Byleth shrugged, the answer was an easy and effortless one. "I'll take the blame and say you were following my orders."

"Who would have thought I was training to kill people who could barely hold a weapon," Felix snorted, shaking his head. "That was as bad as having to see the Boar Prince quenching a rebellion -"

"Enough, Felix," Ingrid snapped, glaring at him. "Though yeah that wasn't a fair fight."

"That's why what we did was fairer, in a sense," Sylvain mumbled, sparing a glance at Ashe.

"We can place flowers on a grave for him later if you want to," Dedue whispered to the archer, who was still silent and hadn't even acknowledged their discussion to begin with. 

"I'd appreciate it," Ashe mumbled at last, stepping closer to the Duscarian and basking in his silence, the strong and grounding presence, even though he kept staring at the floor and tuning others out. "I don't get it. I really don't."

_ I'm so sorry _ , Byleth thought, willing her face to remain stoic in order to not give away the rivulets of feelings coursing through her.  _ He'll be avenged, we'll make sure of it.  _

It was too soon when they arrived back at the monastery and Byleth had to part ways with her students, as Catherine told her they had to immediately report back to Lady Rhea. Hence she had kept going through the Entrance Hall, musing over their forlorn faces and eyes, how that was not the way she wished those missions would be like - or how they would learn to fight in the real world too.

But then, the real world wasn't the chivalry tales some of them were used to reading, or the fair fights they held in so high esteem. Luckily it wasn't like their worst nightmares either, but there was no denying that it could be at times. That honor, duty and loyalties had to be questioned when masters and leaders went way too far.

In sum, that hardly ever were things black and white, no matter how one might have been told to believe so over and over again. 

Sure, that also meant Byleth was too keen on judging Rhea, didn't it? But how else was she supposed to see that mysterious, distant woman whose glances always threatened to unearth her very essence for good or for bad? And who gave them those strange, awful missions that always revolved around keeping the church - and not the defenseless people - safe? 

Maybe her distaste was showing through her frown, for the moment they arrived in the Audience Chamber, abundantly lit in that late afternoon, Rhea rose from her seat and did a double take when her eyes fell upon Byleth's. Reminding herself of the decorum she was supposed to express towards her actual superior, the former mercenary bowed and put on a stoic expression, the same impassable one she had to wear whenever the two met. 

"You have returned to me sooner than I expected," the archbishop began, her smile soft and small, almost not there. "The Goddess is bountiful with her blessings, is She not?"

"Yeah, plenty so, Lady Rhea," Catherine curtseyed again, though her irises were darting everywhere, as if looking for hidden threats. "Lord Lonato wasn't ready for an intervention and his… militia, if we can call it that, was severely underprepared."

"Militia, you say?" Rhea hummed, glancing down at the floor to consider something before looking at her knight again. "Villagers from his territory, I presume. Were they disposed of?"

"Yes. None lives to talk about this… transgression." The look Catherine sent Byleth wasn't as certain as her words portrayed, something that surely wasn't lost to the archbishop.

"Excellent. May the Goddess look upon these poor souls who have strayed from Her way." She traced a pattern in the air with her index finger, light green magic making a symbol that Byleth had seen somewhere before, a crest of sorts. "However, I feel like there is something else you would like to say. What is it?"

"Lonato was carrying a letter that details an assassination plan," Byleth spoke at last, more to avoid suspicion than due to an actual interest to engage in any conversation with Rhea. Once those green eyes turned to her in their prodding nature, she felt again the wish to bolt out of there before her heart could be exposed. "Its objective is to infiltrate the monastery during the rite of rebirth and corner you, Lady Rhea."

The archbishop was silent, considering what she had just heard. It surprised both the former mercenary and the knight when she derisively laughed, as if she had caught naughty children at play. As if that was nothing but a useless threat. "The rite of rebirth, you say? They want to defile these holy grounds in one of the grandest, most important rituals to the faithful? Let them try."

"Lady Rhea- " Catherine started, confused with that response. 

"We shall increase security, mobilize students if necessary. But the culprit will be caught and brought to divine justice for even concocting something like that." The archbishop paused, letting fury run its course through her before settling her unnerving eyes on Byleth. "Thank you, dear child. You are free to go and please, tell the other professors that their classes shall be disrupted for this next month. There will be a lot to be done."

Byleth didn't need to be told twice. She bowed to Rhea and smirked at Catherine, who returned the gesture out of politeness, then closed the door behind her once she stepped outside…

Only to almost gasp in surprise once a figure emerged from the shadows, their clothes so dark it would be easy to not spot them at all, unless they wanted to be seen.

"You scared me," the professor said when she realized it was Hubert. He had an ear pressed against the door, an interested grin on his face. 

He motioned for her to do the same and, although she had half a mind to deny it and go to her room for some rest and a lot of thinking, she complied just in time to catch the end of Catherine's sentence.

"... pretty sure she and her students didn't really kill all the villagers."

"Is that so?" Rhea answered, her tone a lot colder than it had been a few seconds ago. "Well then I require you to go back and hunt them down. That scum can't be allowed to live and spread Lonato's false beliefs to the winds."

Byleth's eyes widened and her hands curled into fists. It couldn't be that all of her work would be for nothing thanks to that woman, that she had been right to think the church didn't want those who thought differently from them.

That she had a right to worry about what would happen to Edelgard once the war started and they would be pittied against a centuries-old organization that had gained too much power, too much influence for its own good. 

"Very well, I shall depart at once, then. But please do keep guards around you all the time and beware of the professor," Catherine answered with no qualms, as if they were talking about the weather. "I don't wanna come back and hear that she did something to you."

"You worry too much, my dear one. And be as it may, I still trust the professor. Sure, she should have done better in regards to the militia but… in time, she will learn and come to see things our way. Mark my words."

The certainty to that, as if it was something inevitable and that Byleth would indeed always be an ally of the church made her stomach reel, her head spinning as Hubert pulled her away into her father's empty office a second before Catherine passed. Her chest hurt, the pain spreading through her body even while Edelgard's vassal assured her he would see that those villagers were taken to safety as soon as they could. 

And although she nodded, thanked him and allowed him to escort her to her own room, that pain only worsened when, for a split second, she was sure she saw the monastery engulfed in flames.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It'd have been interesting if the game gave us some quote on how birthdays were celebrated back at the palace before and after what happened to Edelgard and her siblings. But yeah, it must have been sad to not have them around her any longer too. That's the thought process I used through her musings about the entire thing.
> 
> Ashe's quotes about Lonato always kill me, especially on later chapters when he thinks some more about what happened. So yeah, why not having that mission make the Blue Lions as a whole wonder about the church? 
> 
> Anyways, thanks for reading and have a great weekend!


	7. Together, part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The students are pulled out of their classrooms in order to help with preparations for the Rite of Rebirth.
> 
> Secrets come to light and new steps are taken, with some consequences following them as well.

It was a sigh that woke Dorothea from her latest reverie, one that hasn’t been on the good side of daydreaming and reminded her of days long gone, when she had tried working under the relentless sun of Enbarr in order to get some money to survive. 

Although years had passed, she had found a better job instead of cleaning the front doors of some nobles’ houses and more money, love and adoration that she had ever thought she would, it was interesting to note how memories of those unpleasant times still found a way to worm themselves into her daily life. Even more so then, in an uncomfortably balmy summer day, the sky so blue it actually made her curse and not admire it for once, as it meant there was nothing standing between her and the strong sunlight which worried the back of her head while she swept the floor with a broom.

She looked across the gazebo plaza to where her cleaning companion was, seemingly just as forlorn with a rag on her hands as she dusted off some chairs that had looked pristine before, to the point that they were both questioning why they were doing what they were. 

Ever since Byleth and her class returned from the mission in the mist, one in which Lord Lonato had been eliminated by a still-distraught Ashe, Garreg Mach had been on high alert, guards and knights doing rounds on the perimeter during days and nights, sometimes passing as funny figures when they peered inside a classroom or another for the simple fact that they had been told to do so.

Not that they didn’t have a reason for it, since plotting to assassinate the archbishop was probably the worst crime ever in Fódlan given how highly religion was regarded, but even so. It came to a point that most of the students either started joking around at how seriously that entire thing was being taken or ignored their sudden visitors altogether, focusing on the few moments of class they were allowed to have. 

After all, to say that the entire monastery had been mobilized to help in the upcoming Rite of Rebirth celebration and to make sure everything was ok before, during and after it would be an understatement.

“Are you doing alright, my Ingrid?” Dorothea asked, more than happy to leave behind those dark corners of her mind. If she could focus on helping someone else, someone like the cute knight from the other House that she loved teasing whenever she could, that task and say wouldn't be as miserable - or at least she hoped.

“Eh, it’s nothing,” Ingrid retorted, raised her eyes from the white, circular table she had been dusting in order to glance at Dorothea, who had been sweeping the pristine stony floor for the last half an hour or so. “I just wished I could be training instead of doing whatever the hell we are here.”

“Tell me about it,” the former songstress rolled her eyes, equally exasperated with it. “I mean yes, we should be on the lookout and make sure that Lady Rhea is ok but at the same time this does feel… a bit too extreme. Having all students aid the preparations for the Rite of Rebirth? At this part of the term, no less?”

Soon their tests would be there and the last thing Dorothea wanted was to have to lose sleep in order to not let Manuela down once her magic exams began. Healing spells were proving to be particularly difficult; Linhardt was of no help since everything that didn’t involve crests made him fall asleep in three seconds and her dearest professor kept insisting that the key to her mastering them was within herself, an advice she had heard one too many times while understudying her as a songstress at the Mittelfrank as well. 

And of course now she had almost no time to ask others for help, as whenever the day came to an end everyone was usually way too tired to actually do their own studies, let alone aid her with hers. Which was more than understandable but really, what did a girl have to do in order to get some help? She would be more than happy to oblige too but oh well.

“Ugh, this is insane,” Ingrid huffed as they had been at it for far too long, cleaning, dusting, patrolling, getting deliveries from nearby villages and farms and stocking them properly, so on and so forth. 

There was never any shortage of things to do and sure, at least Professor Byleth didn’t assign most of them any specific tasks, leaving them free to both roam around and cheese it if they wanted to just pretend they were helping, but even so. Yes, those were unusual circumstances and according to lady Rhea, “a great opportunity for the students to learn how to deal with the unexpected, with adversities and on how to manage their own time”.

She didn’t see how she was supposed to manage  _ her  _ time if most of it was spent on someone else’s tasks, though.

“I really just wanted to grab my lance and train,” the knight huffed, wiping the chair under her grasp with a little more force than necessary, causing it to tumble and fall with a clang. 

Dorothea hated seeing her like that, completely unable to do what made her happy. She was guilty of watching Ingrid practice more than once and would always praise her on her skills, the way she was able to fight off both Felix and Dimitri (sometimes Sylvain too) with grace, speed and elegance. Sometimes she would take something from the Dining Hall for the famished Ingrid to eat, especially after she had found out about the blonde’s love of food.

And something that had also become one of her favorite pastimes was trying to lift her mood with a light jab whenever she looked down. “As you should if you ask me. How will you become the best knight in shiny armor if you’re being kept away from the armor and the lance?”

The gasp of surprise and blush she got in return from that, especially since she added a wink to the end of that, made everything worth it. Dorothea snickered, her previous bad mood completely lifted due to that response and how light-hearted she was whenever she was close to Ingrid like that. “Oh, my Ingrid, you’re just too good, do you know that?”

“S- please stop that, Dorothea,” the blonde answered, then shook her head and attempted to focus on the task at hand. At least she no longer felt gloomy about not training, her heart beating in triple speed because of something - someone - else altogether. 

“Heh, not when it’s so fun to get a reaction out of you,” the songstress went on, stopped sweeping and turned to face her companion, one hand on her hips and the other on the broom. “But in any case I do agree, I’ve been missing your practice session since they’re always so… inspiring to look at.”

“Oh really?” Ingrid let go of the cloth in her hands and faced the other girl, ignoring how her cheeks were burning with embarrassment at all of that. “Well, I’d love to see  _ you  _ practicing magic, but I’d love it even more if you went back to leading the choir at services. Y- your uh…” she stopped, unable to complete the thought and shying away when Dorothea’s emerald eyes widened in a mixture of surprise and curiosity. She couldn’t fight back, couldn’t make her get a taste of her own poison. “Ugh, how do you say those things so easily?”

For the blonde’s sake Dorothea simply chuckled and waited a moment or two so she could recover. Then she gave a sly smile, approached Ingrid with languid steps and said: “Well you see, now I’m interested to hear the rest of that. You wouldn’t leave me hanging like that, would you, my Ingrid?”

The knight thought she would combust on the spot if the songstress got any closer, remembering similar times when something like that had happened. She glanced down at the table, picked up the cloth she had discarded a second ago and went back to cleaning as if that were the most important thing in the world. She could feel that Dorothea was about to press again, but luckily a lilting voice cut through their silence and saved Ingrid from humiliating herself any further.

“Have you some need of assisting - uh, assistance?”

The sweet words, which were followed by an open, earnest smile, made Dorothea shift her attention to the newcomer instead, making the blonde sigh in relief. She shot Petra a grateful stare that made the Brigid princess tilt her head in wonder, whereas Thea simply relaxed, beamed and welcomed her with a wave. 

“Sure, if you don’t mind us just dusting and the likes,” the former songstress answered, delighted with the new company.

She would forever be the one to say that the more, the merrier. And what was best, she loved being in Petra's company since it was always a delight to just talk and be with her, to discuss how different their lives had been and how the Brigid princess was doing in that new environment.

“Of course! Also, Professor Manuela told to tell you that we will be having a special training session later today, so we need to be over with the tasks before noon - no, before the sun downs.” Petra commented, then watched as Ingrid’s head snapped to attention at the mention of some practice battles. “You want to be joining us?”

“I- I mean, I really want to do some training but I don’t think the Professor would allow me to just go over to your session like that,” the blonde gloomly replied, sighed, going back to her task as if nothing exciting had happened. “Which is such a shame, Petra, I really wanted to spar with you some time.”

The way Dorothea’s eyes glinted at that should have let Ingrid know that trouble was coming again, but even so she beamed at how interested the mage seemed to be at that exchange - or at the possibility of having her over for more than just a shared meal. One in which she would tease the knight on how cute she looked while eating after a long training session. “Well, we won’t tell anyone if you don’t.”

“B- but Professor Manuela -”

“Is my responsibility to be dealt with.” Dorothea winked, walked closer to Ingrid and snagged the cloth away from the blonde with ease, given how distracted she had been. “Now please go get some rest and let me do this, or else you’ll be too tired to go to our practice later on. You've been at it for almost an hour and it's no good. You'll need to be in top shape to defeat my Petra later on."

She had to keep herself from chuckling at how Ingrid’s mouth was hanging agape, cheeks colored a deep crimson, her mind unable to form some sort of cohesive response to the jab and the challenge. Likewise, Petra beamed in amusement while glancing at the two of them, then quickly protested when Dorothea started sweeping the ground around the gazebo, cloth draped on her shoulder.

“Oh no, you should not have the worries with this, I will do it,” the princess said, grabbing the broom on the songstress’s hands and trying to snatch it away. “Please, Dorothea, I want to be of assistance to you.”

“I can deal with dusting, dear, why don’t you and Ingrid chill for a while?" Thea asked with a wink, noticed a little too late that her words might be misunderstood. 

"Chill? But it is the middle of the summer, is it not? Unlike you, my uh understandingness of magic is not good," Petra pouted, downcast, before focusing like Manuela had told her to one day, when she showed some curiosity on how Dorothea did what she did with Thunders and Thorons. 

A slight breeze answered her call, not enough to even lift her braids or Ingrid's from their heads. At least it made both Dorothea and Ingrid chuckle before the knight sat down in one of the few tables away from the sun and offered a place to Petra as well.

Meanwhile, in a different part of the monastery another girl was suffering with those arrangements for a completely distinct reason.

The last few weeks hadn't been kind to Lysithea. She huffed at the weight of the books which she was having to carry, some volumes that had apparently been forgotten in the Reception Hall, scattered on the wooden tables located on both sides of the place. While it was nice to know that some people had been at the small shelves at the Knights’ Hall and taken those books out for some studying, well, it would have been even better if they had had the decency to return those to their own places afterwards.

But no, they hadn’t. They had left the poor volumes in different locations, some open, lying facedown on the tables with their pages now creased or bearing stains. Only the goddess would know for how long they had been there, tossed aside like toys a kid had used and discarded once something more interesting happened.

“Ugh, you would  _ think  _ they would be more respectful towards all the invaluable books one can find in the monastery, but nooo,” Lysithea mumbled to herself, carrying a pile of at least ten rather big books on her arms, puffing due to the effort and the fact that she had been doing that for the best part of the morning instead of studying. “Bunch of kids who don’t really value - ugh.”

Suddenly a wave of blackness enveloped her and she felt as if her feet were no longer on the ground. A white, cold sensation coursed through her body, started low at her belly and went all the way up to her heart, her head and lungs, making her breathing speed up and her vision swim.

The fact that it wasn’t the first time she had felt something like that didn’t make it any less unpleasant, though at least she knew exactly what to do when nausea and tiredness hit her like that. Grunting to herself in frustration since there was a chance someone would catch her doing something of the sorts, she slumped against the closest wall just inside the Knights’ Hall and allowed her legs to collapse under her, slumping to the floor.

Lysithea closed her eyes, willing her mind to focus on the mess of books now surrounding her instead of the underlying words of self hatred that were already coursing through her mind, telling her that the problem wasn’t on the monastery staff making her do things she wasn’t used to, performing tasks that for others were no issue at all - it was her that was at fault. She and her accursed past, the twin crests that made her so powerful, so much of a “natural” with magic and the sorts.

The twin crests that had been the result of an experiment, one that failed and granted her not only power she had never asked for, but the death of the other kids in House Ordelia, the horrendous reduction of her lifespan, snow white hair that she utterly despised and of course, what was worse… 

People such as Professor Hanneman, an acclaimed crest scholar, to pester her with issues she would rather leave alone. With memories that she didn’t want to revisit, a past she would rather forget. If all she had gone through could fill her with strength and an objective to move forth, to make the best out of the years she still had in the world, then good.

If it would undermine her, her efforts and her determination to give her parents a gentle rest after all they had seen, even if she did end up going before they did, then that was when she had a problem. And right then, as it stopped her from doing something as mundane as placing books back on their damned places, it was totally being a nuisance she didn’t want.

The world around her was fading to black as those thoughts went through her head, exhaustion threatening to take her over and making her rage at the thought of being found like this. Depending on who did, if someone even noticed, a huge fuzz would be made - worse still, maybe Professor Hanneman would be called and -

“No, shh, don’t move. It is ok, I will put those back where they belong.”

The gentle voice that surrounded her was followed by an even softer hand on her arm, one which squeezed her in reassurance and made her stay in place even when she wanted to get up and go back to what she was supposed to be doing. Lysithea craned her neck, trying to take a look at who gathered the books around her and was walking towards the shelves that stood in the other side of the hall, right in front of the fireplace that was thankfully out - overheating didn’t help whenever her dizzy spells happened and that was a very warm day already. 

Although she couldn’t focus at first, gradually her tiredness went away and she was able to see that not only she wasn’t on the floor anymore, but at some point or another she had been moved to the biggest, most comfortable chair in there. And that the person who had helped her was none other than Edelgard von Hresvelg, who was currently placing books back on the shelf, her lilac eyes shifting between the task in front of her and the girl she had left behind.

“Hey there, how are you feeling?” The princess asked once she put the last volume in place, realizing Lysithea was coming by. She tried taking some of the concern away from her voice, knowing too well that the smaller mage would hate her if she ever patronized her in some form.

Which was exactly why Edelgard had neither called for professor Manuela to look at the girl nor sent for another healer - also, she thought she had a very good idea of what was going on already, if her hunch about the famous Ordelia mage and her amazing powers were to be believed. 

If only they knew a bit about what the girl had probably gone through before, too… Edelgard hadn’t been told enough, but the slithers sometimes whispered between themselves about a failed experiment, one that lived but wouldn’t do so for too long. One from the Alliance, who had been granted crests at the expense of her life. 

A glance at Lysithea and her magic - plus what kind of magic she used, those powers that resonated with what Edelgard knew she, too, could wield - and she had a very good feeling of who the slithers had been talking about. Suffice to say her hatred for them and their actions had expanded tenfold after the mock battle and she was kept wondering if the other girl would listen to her, were she to reach out a hand.

Not that any of those thoughts were welcome there, Edelgard mused as she approached the chair where she had deposited a very pale Lysithea. She beamed while the shorter girl’s pink irises widened in surprise before looking away, but it was a delight nevertheless to see more life behind those eyes.

“I- I’m fine, thanks for your help,” Lysithea said at last, mostly talking to the chair instead of the princess that was looming in front of her. While she had wanted to speak with Edelgard some day or another after that fiasco on her birthday, that didn’t mean she wished to do it then, after appearing so weak and defenceless.

So much a child that needed help with every little thing.

“You were gathering books that have been lying around the monastery grounds, correct?” Edelgard went on, unbothered by the other girl’s unease. She quite understood that feeling, remembering how much she had hated being weak all the time after she was released from the experiments and the underground too. 

She could relate to what Lysithea was going through, if she was reading the situation correctly.

“Yes and I- I will get back to it after -”

“Oh no, you should really get some rest, honestly,” Edelgard continued, then surprised Lys by grabbing a chair and pulling it close to hers. “I could use one myself, but it is quite boring to sit around without someone to talk to, given how busy everyone else is. So… I won’t tell if you don’t.”

Lysithea didn’t know what actually did the trick and made her relax. Maybe it was the kind words and the gesture, the fact that her being tired wasn’t seen like a bad or odd thing, one that deserved further examination or something of the sorts. Or perhaps it was the lilt, the smile in Edelgard’s voice and her tone, both mischievous and soft, as if they were sharing a great secret and a moment that would be only theirs.

Above everything else though, there was the companionship, the certainty that she would neither be judged nor asked about her crests, her past. And yes, Lysithea was pretty sure by then that the reason could be that the two shared an unfortunate experience, one that they wouldn’t delve into on that moment of shared respite. Even so, there was a smile on the smaller mage’s face when she nodded, adjusted herself on the chair and stared at the books that had been organized on the shelf.

When a gloved hand softly encased hers and squeezed it, a touch full of support and care instead of prying and curiosity, Lysithea exhaled in relief and beamed. For the first time in her life, she was no longer calling herself names due to her past and its consequences in her present.

* * *

“I uh… wanted to thank you for today.”

It had been a surprise when Lysithea knocked on Edelgard’s room door that night after curfew was in place. Taken aback due to the interruption to their kisses, Byleth had hid underneath the bed again as it would soon become her place whenever someone paid Edelgard a visit, then beamed in delight when she saw who it was. Even more so while she listened to the conversation that was taking place quite literally above her head, as the two girls took a seat on the bed.

“Whatever for? It was nice to just relax for a moment and talk about our classes,” Edelgard replied with the hint of a smile on her voice. 

“You know what for,” in contrast Lysithea’s tone was downcast, nodding to the unspoken thing between them. The one that bonded them together in the way that unpleasant memories had a way of doing, ever-present even if it was spoken of in riddles and allusions. “But again, I appreciate you treating that - treating me - as if it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary.”

“I am sorry that it is not something out of the ordinary to you, Lysithea,” El lost all the playfulness to her words, letting herself admit to what she knew, to what had always been there. “And I'm here to talk about this, if you ever want to.”

“Me too,” the mage sighed, unsure of how to proceed. The room was dark, with nothing but a flimsy candle flame illuminating their faces in soft angles and eerie lights. Yet those were enough to ward off the worst of her recollections about being helpless, in the dark.

Either that or the fact that her hand covered Edelgard’s in the next second kept away the cold that always ran through her when she remembered small things, bits and pieces of that life. Most of them haunted her in dreams, flashes in strange moments when they were completely uncalled for. She had a feeling she would always fight against that, no matter how long had passed.

“Do you also feel tired?” Lysithea asked, unconsciously drawing closer to the older girl, unsure if it was ok to ask about that.

“Not as much as before, no. I have heard that… what we have been given does put an added strain in our bodies, so at times I do feel drained and have to lie down for a few moments,” the princess said, internally wincing at the fact that Byleth was listening to that - and she was pretty sure she had never told her lover about it with so many details. Well, no matter, she just wanted to soothe her friend, to make her feel accepted in a sense.

“I am glad, then. There is nothing worse than that,” the second part of the sentence was a whisper, one laden with hatred that made Edelgard frown and, in a split second, draw the girl into a gentle hug.

“You have survived. I know this isn’t always as good as it sounds,” El added a second later; at times she wondered if she had had any business still being there, what with how the rest of her family wasn't. “But that means you can do something about it, Lysithea, as I have seen you doing already - what, did you think you were the only one doing extra hours in the library?”

They went back and forth on that for a while, pressed together in the hug that gave them both strength and courage to speak up, to talk about lighter issues and brush upon darker ones as well. In the end, luckily before Byleth could start dozing off on the ground, the mage announced that she should get going before the ghosts decided they would get to her for defying curfew and the professor was sure she would finally have her lover back.

Only to have to wait some more as Edelgard adamantly insisted on taking the girl back to her room, no matter how Lys said she wasn’t a child and could take care of herself - then proceeded to eye the empty hallway in fear.

The moment El closed the door behind her back again and Byleth was finally able to wriggle her way outside of the mattress, the professor had a smile on her face and a very nice idea in mind, something that was easily noted by the girl.

"Is everything ok? I am sorry about this and I didn't intend to let you stay there for that long but -" El started as she walked towards the bed, then halted when the woman beamed and got to her feet in a lithe movement.

"It's fine, truly. But hey, how would you feel about taking a stroll around the grounds for a change?" Byleth proposed, one hand toying with Edelgard's. "We haven't had time to do it during the day, what with the preparations for the ritual and how busy we've been. Plus, I've wanted to do this for a while, too."

And she had, the idea planting itself in her mind the moment Annette and Mercedes asked her to go with them to the nearby city in search of some spices or the likes. Byleth had gotten lost in thoughts during that little trip while her students chattered animatedly about their classes, classmates, assignments and the nature around them. Only the latter subject had attracted the woman's attention, as the path through which they had been walking wove itself between woods of verdant greens and amazing emeralds. There had been a silvery stream to the side at one point, the water running so fast there was no doubt it would be part of a waterfall later on. 

Knowing how (and why) Edelgard enjoyed the outdoors, there was no way for Byleth not to think about taking her lover there as soon as she could - and that sleepless night, after long days of being a bit apart due to the craziness going on in the monastery, felt just perfect for that.

The two quietly rushed outside of the princess's room and downstairs, giggling at the soft, loving conversation they could hear coming from Hilda's quarters between her and Marianne, then took a moment to marvel at the night that welcomed them. The balmy breeze which was at odds with how cold the sky looked, completely covered by clouds that promised rain later on, probably before the next day began with its scorching warmth as it had been happening for the last few nights in a row.

Even so they rushed through the empty pond, scaring some cats that had been prowling in search of an owl or another bird, then rounded to the marketplace with mischievous grins already in place…

Only to stop dead in their tracks, Edelgard almost collapsing into Byleth once the woman froze, the moment she noticed they weren’t alone and that they wouldn’t really be since security had been increased ever since she brought back that accursed letter to the archbishop.

There weren’t as many guards in the gates as she thought she had seen at first, Byleth realized while she peeked over the wall, one hand on her lover’s mouth so she wouldn’t make a surprised sound and warn the knights there was someone around the corner. Only two very bored men stood in front of the grated portal, leaning against it and pretty much almost falling asleep. Their choice of weapons were swords that stood in their hips, unsheathed.

At the rate that they were (mostly not) moving, it would be too easy for the professor to simply run through them with her own blade - they would never see what had attacked them.

“Is that really what they call security?” She mused aloud, released Edelgard and stepped aside so the girl could see what was going on, what was standing between them and their freedom. 

“Hmpf, that is pathetic indeed. I had better guards positioned in front of my cell when I misbehaved,” Edelgard huffed, though she halted the memory right there once Byleth squeezed her shoulder in sympathy. They both knew very well what type of misbehaving she was talking about. 

In the end they had to creep to the other side of the monastery, then climb the wall there in order to finally see what was beyond those gates without the guards really suspecting anything. While it would be almost too effortless for both of them to subdue those guys, the last thing they wanted was to run the risk of being seen, to call attention to the fact that people were walking in and out of Garreg Mach during the night and end up making an entire mess because of such a whimsical situation.

Nevertheless it was worth it, the sense of danger making them beam in exhilaration once they stepped outside of the monastery and into the sprawling Oghma Mountains. Turfs of grass and small bushes soon became tall trees and a rocky path underneath their feet, once Byleth found her way back to the place that Mercedes and Annette had taken her to. Seeing the delighted smile on Edelgard’s face made her own chest feel lighter, a similar beam flourishing on her own lips. 

“This is really incredible, By,” El commented once they got near the stream and sat down to appreciate it, the calming sound of running water, its motion and relentless flow. “I, thank you for taking me here, it is definitely better than staying indoors all the time.”

“I realized the only people I had been on a walk with were other students, not the girl I love,” Byleth shifted closer and leaned her head on Edelgard’s shoulder - a shame, since she lost how deeply the girl blushed and how her eyes widened at the mention of love. While not a foreign word, it wasn’t one they had often used until then. “So when I saw you taking Lysithea back to her room without any troubles, well, I decided it was time we had our own little thing too.”

Too many seconds were spent in silence, Edelgard’s body tense, her heart speeding up in a mixture of adrenaline and sheer adoration for her partner that made words completely elude her. How was she supposed to express her thanks for that simple, albeit so thoughtful gesture? As a princess she had had enough meaningless, grandiose events thrown around in her name, everything from marriage propositions (yes, even before she was of age) and birthday gifts meant to make other nobles look good to the Lord Regent’s eyes. 

Yet none had touched her heart and made her feel as warm as that, the realization that not only had Byleth thought about her enough to take her there - even though they had almost gotten into trouble because of it - but also that this was their own space, their own sacred moment in which the rest of the world didn’t matter. Right then there was no war to be fought, no archbishop to be protected, no slithers to mind. There was only Byleth and Edelgard, with the latter completely frozen and unsure of how to proceed.

“Is uh, did I say something, El?” Byleth asked, upset at that silence, then leaned away from her lover’s shoulder and simply stared at her moonstruck eyes, at how the lilac in them seemed to dance and ebb away when their gazes met. At how lovely everything was, how it seemed like a passage out of a tale that her students liked reading, or a dream they were sharing but hadn’t realized until then. 

Yet when Edelgard shook her head in order to wake herself up, then tentatively leaned forward before placing a soft kiss on Byleth’s lips, she knew they weren’t dreaming. That was reality and, as much as it wasn’t perfect, as much as they had barely seen each other outside of dreams until that night because of how tired they had been, that moment was theirs and it was real. And that was better than whatever dream they would be able to conjure between themselves.

Yet reality couldn’t actually be that perfect… and a second later, when Byleth was about to reciprocate the kiss and try showing the girl all the love she felt for her, they were reminded of it by the snapping of a twig somewhat close to them.

Before Edelgard could even register the sound, or understand what was going on, Byleth had already sprung to her feet and placed herself in front of the princess, the dagger that was always on her already drawn. Less than a heartbeat later she used it to deflect a spell, an ominous sphere of dark purple lights that resonated inside El’s chest as much as the coldness that always gripped her whenever the slithers were close.

That time however, it was different and she understood why. She didn’t even have to see the man strolling to them in full dark armor to know who had attacked her lover, red eyes shining between the emerald foliage around them.

But when he did present himself to them, scythe in hands and another spell surrounding the lance with its heavy, draining energy, Edelgard’s heart lurched inside her chest in a mixture of guilt and fear. Fear, because she knew he had been denied a hunt recently and a participation in some missions as well, but also the fact that Emile had approached them in his Death Knight persona, never a good thing. Guilt, because she was supposed to look after him, to give him another chance to reconnect to the sister he had lost, and she had failed in both accounts.

Plus she had yet to tell Byleth that the man in front of them, the threat that her body was answering to with an offensive stance, was actually an ally that had to be preserved above all else.

Since words would take too long to convey that, Edelgard simply took in the two fighters’ hesitation, that lull before the battle in which battlers would measure one another and gauge what would be the best way to defeat their opponent, and pivoted in front of her very surprised lover.

“Halt. You have no business here,” she spoke and felt Byleth flinching behind her, at the sheer authority and command behind her tone. It was not something she got to hear often so the shock - and her positioning herself in the open, weaponless like that - must have been quite an experience. 

She would have to apologize profusely afterwards - if they survived that to begin with. It wasn’t tough for the princess to remember the day in which she had met and rescued that boy a few years older than her, how he had been lurking in the abandoned, bloodsoaked mansion that had belonged to the Bartels, a family line that seemingly disappeared before Edelgard was imprisoned underground. Even then, a few years after her return to the surface, he had lurked at those grounds, unsure about what to do with himself and the power, the darkness which resided inside of him.

One that he had felt an echo of when he looked at a young Edelgard who came into the mansion to investigate on her own, then remained inside after being met with decaying bodies and smears of blood that were never cleaned. Their conversation, albeit brief, was enough to convince him that not all was lost. That he could find his sister and see that he had saved her from his scoundrel of a father, one that had loved him and mistreated a girl named Mercedes. 

That he could be more than the shadows that inhabited his mind and their will for destruction, if he reached out for her hand. If he took that chance and trusted that she could help. 

They had mostly talked with their eyes back then and quickly enough Edelgard had learned how to interpret small nuances that perhaps others like her uncle and even Hubert had missed, her vassal almost killing Emile on the spot once he saw how the boy was quietly living in between so much human waste and small animals that had gone into the house. She knew something in her eyes had spoken to his back then. Maybe it was the weight of her trauma, still too recent and unable to be kept at bay. 

However, this time the eyes she was staring at were artificial, a mask powered by technology none but the slithers could both make and understand. So the fact that she tried prodding them for a response, then exerting her will through a glance alone, was completely lost on Emile.

A fact she was made aware of when the man simply rushed at her with a scythe in hand, as if their past and their alliance meant absolutely nothing at all and she was just a mere nuisance standing in the way of his real challenge. Which was indeed how Jeritza had looked at Byleth the first moment they met, as Edelgard had heard the man referring to her as the only enemy worth fighting. 

"El, stand back!" The woman bellowed, side stepping her and raising the dagger again to absorb a blow that had been heading towards Edelgard. She was more confused than anything else, wanting to understand what was going on and why her unarmed lover had placed herself in the open like that. 

Or how she had seemed to be somewhat familiar with the weird knight in dark armor which shone against the purple light that emanated from his scythe. 

He had the upper hand with that weapon of course, what with how much longer than a mere dagger it was. Yet his heavy armor slowed him down the slightest, enough so Byleth could sidestep his slash, get into his personal space and aim her short blade on his shoulder, trying to connect with skin instead of metal but knowing she had failed when a screeching sound reached her ears.

The professor jumped away just in time to avoid another attack, one that would have connected with her torso if she hadn't reacted as quickly as she did. Since she was able to place some valuable distance between them, the two fighters took stock of each other again, a respite in a dance that seemingly wouldn't end too soon. 

Even so, the last thing two out of three people in that scenario wanted was to have a battle like that in the middle of nowhere. The possibility of drawing attention or curious eyes was minimal, but the two women would be in trouble if either of them were harmed. 

"Leave and I'll spare you," Byleth huffed, a futile attempt at best.

"There is no other end to this fight but death," the knight answered, his altered voice making chills run down Edelgard's spine. She hadn't seen the slithers' latest development of Emile's armor and truth be told, that wasn't a setting in which she wanted to actually test it out.

"No," the princess tried again, rushing to stand beside the professor. "Listen to me, this is  _ not  _ a battle for you. She isn't your enemy and neither am I, you know this," even in his darkest days Emile had faltered to lift a knife in her direction. What was going on?

"I need… the kill."

That was followed by a lunge in their general direction, one that both women avoided in time by darting on two different ways. The knight's eyes followed them, going for one to the other before making a decision in favor of Byleth, the most capable enemy in his mind. 

He turned to fully face her, thoughts burning with the sweet anticipation of destroying, of finally letting his full nature be let free after days and nights of roaming the monastery pretending to be someone else. Pretending to spar with kids and knights, as if that alone would be enough to quench his thirst, or with wild animals around Garreg Mach when killing became necessary.

Those hunts were easy, unsatisfactory. Now there was someone in front of him who would fight as much as they could, someone with equal fierceness in their eyes and a sudden change to their demeanor that Emile could relate to. 

A coldness which gradually took over Byleth's eyes, making them hollow and focused instead of pondering, scared, concerned for the girl that had been beside her. 

One moment and everyone was still, deaf to Edelgard's words and the meaning behind them. The next was a flurry of motions and sounds as both the Death Knight and Byleth rushed to meet each other, the woman no longer trying to defend herself and her lover but going for lethal attacks with the puny dagger in her hand, each sweep and cut as full of intent as Emile's slashes were. 

Meanwhile the princess could do nothing more than watch the exchange with wide eyes and a sinking heart, trying her best to make sense of everything that was going on. Her thoughts were rushing, jumping between possibilities and outcomes, unable to understand why it seemed that the Byleth who was there, so intent on destroying her enemy, wasn’t her Byleth at all.

That it was as if she were seeing someone else, someone new that she had only heard about in dreams long gone, when they had been younger and far apart.

The woman’s movements were meticulous, more than they usually were in the few times Edelgard had seen her fight. Her footwork was precise, aggressively pressing forward whenever she could and backing away only after she was sure there was nothing else to be done. The fact that she had a dagger and Emile a scythe didn’t stop her from going all out, strategy long forgotten as the tides of battle took her over.

The tides and ebbs of an ancient fighting instinct, some knowledge that had guided Byleth when she was a child and made her one of the best mercenaries in the company no matter how old she had been. The same intuition of sorts that had clouded her against the brutality of her job or the casualties it - and she - often claimed. On that night for some reason it was back, the misty veil that shrouded her and made her able to relentlessly strike and move, uncaring for life, until she got to the outcome that had been asked of her.

Something that was made even worse by the fact that for split seconds her eyes seemed to register another image, one in which the ominous knight in front of her tore through a different battlefield claiming lives with his weapons, brandishing death on their hands. Violence trailing after them and sometimes tears as well, after his scythe had claimed a life he had held dear. And against the red and the black and the purple that made up the combat in her mind, there was… the monastery? A fort?

She couldn't really say, but whatever those images were, they fed into her moves and the motivation behind them. The moment his weapon came down to strike her she dodged and twisted, grabbing the ominous scythe and pulling at it until she was able to wrestle it free from them. The burning sensation of an unfamiliar magic against her palm went unnoticed, then receded while the weapon adjusted to her and was used against its master. 

And although the knight was still a seasoned fighter, parrying with his armor and avoiding hits that were swifter than his had been, there was a limit to how much they could go on without any weapon at all. Soon Byleth started landing one too many slashes, her physical strength adding to the little magic she knew and making those blows powerful enough to tear through the dark armor in vital points such as limbs and torso. Metal plates fell to the ground with loud clangs, grunts coming from the man as blood trickled down his torn clothes.

A moment more and he was on the floor, panting hard, the mask and a few gauntlets the only things still keeping his body safe, his identity protected from the woman that towered over him with a blank expression. There was no victory in her eyes or smugness in her face. There was no light coming from her, her entire demeanor as bleak and unreadable like the overcast night sky. 

Yet it wasn’t sadness that engulfed Emile when she rose the scythe in the air one last time, ready to claim his life for that imprudence, for letting his bloodlust speak more than anything else. There was a smile on his lips and a name on his tongue, one that he couldn’t understand why it was there.

One that was uttered, a small "Mercedes" that didn't stop the weapon from coming down towards him.

Yet it hit the grass beside him with a woosh, the blade burying itself into the ground and surprising him before it was retrieved. There was no rhyme or reason for such a powerful foe and seasoned fighter to make that mistake, was there?

But then he looked up and thought he saw a flurry of motion, a smaller person hitting the professor’s side and making her miss in such a way. Even so, what had stopped her from following that up with another blow, one that would -

“Byleth stop this, it’s me!”

Edelgard’s voice made Emile bolt to his feet despite his injuries, just in time to see the woman push the princess to the floor with a tackle, then stand over her with the same empty demeanor that she had kept while waiting to strike her down.

“Traitor,” Byleth mumbled, the visions in her mind becoming too strong, so strong it was tough to notice that she wasn’t in a secluded place with tombs around her. That the girl in front of her hadn’t been wearing a black and red disguise, a mask of the same colors over her face.

That Edelgard hadn’t betrayed her in any way, shape or form and her words hung hollow, making the princess in front of her even more scared when she upended the scythe. And ceased to move.

One second, two. Three and something inside Byleth stirred, a small voice that was almost begging for her to stop before she did something she would regret later. 

Ten seconds, her arms aching with the effort of keeping up the weapon, one that burned with energy that wasn’t her own, that had resonated with her own even so.

Half a minute later, the moment Emile had finally gathered enough strength and resolve to approach her, Byleth blinked and widened hazy, languid eyes at the sight of Edelgard, pale, hurt and confused, lying in front of her with tears in her eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the follow up to that last scene got a little too long for it to not be placed in a different chapter, which is why it will have a part two coming next xD 
> 
> I just love Lysithea and Edelgard as sisters since they both lost their families due to something quite terrible and all. So it felt better to have this scene actually fleshed out instead of just mentioned like in the first version of this. I hope you enjoyed that!
> 
> Thanks for reading and have a great week.


	8. Together, part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byleth and Edelgard face their questions on what occurred during that night stroll, finding no easy answer regardless of how much they think about it.
> 
> Later on, the three house leaders talk about the church of Seiros while making sure the cathedral is ready for the Rite of Rebirth.

“El? El, what’s wrong?”

The words were raspy, as if Byleth hadn’t spoken for the last few days and was just again learning how to do so. And although she knew deep in her heart that it wasn’t the case, that she and her students had been helping the monastery prepare for the Rite of Rebirth somewhere in the distant past, she would be lying if she said she could remember what she was doing alone with Edelgard at night, in the middle of what felt like nowhere.

And what was worse, not only was her lover on the floor, breath heaving due to more fear than exertion and a few slight bruises in her body, those lilac eyes were widened in fear and pain, as if something weird had happened right then that hurt her terribly. 

That gaze, that scared and lost gaze, was aimed at no one other than her. 

She could only stare and stand back since the princess scooted away when she took a step forward. Apparently there was nothing she could do but wait until that - whatever that was - passed and she was allowed to get near Edelgard again. 

What exactly had occured back then and why couldn’t she remember anything, nor the reason why her muscles throbbed and parts of her torso, forearms and hands were pulsing in pain? That sensation wasn’t foreign to her, nor was the fact that it wasn't the first time she had drawn a blank or felt like she was waking from a reverie like that. She had almost forgotten about this distant past in which such occurrences were more common, as everything that had come later had been better, had demanded more of her attention and focus once she started processing emotions instead of just facts.

But that night, that uncertainty harkened back to the days when she had been known more as the Ashen Demon than Byleth Eisner. More as a young, ruthless mercenary than the person who had dreamed of a young girl in danger, then had those dreams completely discredited to her own anger.

And since the pain in her body and lack of a decent memory back then meant she had been in a fight as of recent, then right in that night it could only mean that…

“Step away from Your Majesty, now,” a silent, menacing voice whispered behind her, so low it was almost lost to the roaring winds that surrounded the place they were in, which she supposed had recently been a battlefield.

A second later and she felt something twisting her arm, taking from her whatever heavy, ominous thing she had been carrying before; a second later and something sharp and cold, like a different sort of metal, pushed against the small of her back. Though she had barely any idea of what was going on, of what she should do or even who was behind her, she did as told and put more distance between her and Edelgard, with the girl watching her every move in anticipation.

The only thing that was etched in those lilac eyes she loved so much was the almost certainty that at some point or another, Byleth would spring into action and do something terrible, something that more than likely would end up hurting both her and the man that had been there for some reason or another. 

No matter how much she wanted to go to her, to comfort her and ask for clarifications, there was no getting away from that predicament without following orders for now. She did so until Edelgard was almost just a shadow on the floor that was clutching the side of her arm and tending it, wiping it clear of blood.

When a sneaking suspicion showed up as a fleeting, ominous thought, Byleth grimaced and hoped it hadn’t been the case.

“Good,” the same voice whispered, one that was familiar in a way but she couldn’t yet say why, or attach a face to it. The weapon was removed from her back and she immediately relaxed, yet remained immobile and waiting for what else they wanted her to do. “Are you still feeling unwell?”

“I wasn’t feeling unwell before,” Byleth uttered, holding herself in check even though she really wanted to look at her captor. That will dwindled when she noticed Edelgard gingerly getting to her feet and brushing herself off, dubious violet eyes set on her and her only. 

“No? Was always it your intention to attack the girl then?” There was a slight, bemused edge to their tone right then, one that made everything about their words a lot worse than they already were.

Were they implying that she - “Did I do that? Did I attack her?” She couldn’t hold the question anymore, almost giving to the impulse of rushing to her lover and meeting her halfway since she was slowly but surely making her way to them as well. 

“You don’t recall what just happened.” It was a statement instead of a question, yet the professor nodded anyways, opening and closing her fists in quick succession. She had been known to maintain control no matter what, her mercenary training betting on that and honing her skills to ignore urges and the likes. 

It was one thing to be out on the battlefield on a mission, trying to do something for a person or another that would reward them greatly for it. While completely understandable, it was only normal to be prudent in situations such as those, where rushing in, not having a plan or enough information about their enemy could prove to be fatal. The waiting game, while tedious to those that wanted to be in the heat of battle as soon as possible, was almost as important as the mission itself in most of the cases. 

However, it was something else when such missions also had feelings involved into them, something other than self-preservation or the preservation of others. The moment there was a twist in her chest, a pulsing concern that was worse than any of the pain points in her body and a feeling of dread that almost overcame the fact that she would be risking her life if she pretty much moved in any way her captor didn’t like, she found herself struggling for the first time in her life. She wished that either she could overpower her opponent so they would stand between her and her lover, or for Edelgard to hurry and close the chasm between them, to offer an explanation.

To no longer look at Byleth as if she were one second away from harming her in any possible way.

There was still some tension in the air even though no battle was being fought between two or more people. That didn’t account for the one inside Byleth's mind, as she tried remembering what had transpired in the last few minutes, what could have resulted in such a scenario. Once Edelgard was a few meters away from her, leaning against a tree and simply staring at the other two, the former mercenary took one step forward and almost sighed in relief when that wasn’t regarded as a bad thing for her to do.

“Lower your weapon, Death Knight,” the princess called, voice twisted with something like pain, suffering for the scene in front of her and whatever else had happened in the bleary past. “She can be trusted and I will not have you fighting her, as specified before.”

“Your Majesty, with all due respect she is an unlikely ally if she can be prone to such -” the man fell silent at something he saw in Edelgard’s eyes, some sort of defiance that was at odds with everything else at least in Byleth’s opinion. Not that she knew any better or why that would be the case, but even so.

If nothing, it was surprising how fast El had recovered from that shock, suppressing the danger and panic that had coursed through her before. Now her entire demeanor was regal and imposing, not a princess who had cried in her dreams while stuck in a dungeon, but an almost emperor who stood proud and strong in front of a situation few could make sense of.

Whatever the knight behind her thought about it was irrelevant, as they did lower their weapon and stepped away from Byleth the moment Edelgard approached and made it known through nothing more than a glimpse that their presence was no longer wanted there.

“I see you are feeling better,” the princess said to the knight even then, her face turned away from the former mercenary even if they were in front of each other. “What has brought you here to begin with? It doesn’t look like you are hunting either.”

“They have deployed me for… some experiments,” they said, reading the interest and the reserve on Edelgard's expression after the use of that word. “I was longing for a fight so I accepted their request, even if I was not to battle against human opponents.”

Slowly the Death Knight told them about how they had been ordered to watch over a village nearby, an almost empty one that had been used by the slithers to run some of their research. Unfortunately they didn’t know enough about it to make an actual report to the princess, who placated them and just asked if they could pay attention to what those people were doing in order to give her some information on it, as it seemed she had been kept away from that as well.

The Death Knight’s part of their mission was to fight strange beasts they had never seen or battled against before, not to death or anything of the sorts, but mostly to either calm the monsters down or make them able to be transported out of the Oghma mountains. The entire thing was not only suspicious, as most of the activities done by the slithers were, but potentially very dangerous since the church would soon notice there were strange beasts walking the land all of a sudden.

“They are being careful enough as it is, at least in their eyes. I have been walking around at night for a while now and didn't notice them until I was called in to assist,” the knight said, then sighed and removed their mask, letting long blond hair tied in a ponytail free of any restraints. 

Only for Byleth to widen her eyes and place herself in front of Edelgard as soon as she realized that she was face to face with instructor Jeritza, one of the few professors that was either not as present in staff meetings or as talkative as it would be expected of a teacher in the occasions he did attend. 

“You,” the former mercenary said with some menace in her voice, recalling how vicious the man was while fighting some of her students that had dared to challenge him. 

“He is an ally, Byleth,” Edelgard intervened as soon as she noted the professor’s hands edging back to the dagger she had put on its scabbard once she grabbed the scythe. “I understand it might not look like that right now, but -” she rubbed her temples, exasperated at the confusion and havoc that they created in such little time. Her thoughts were running, searching for a solution to that predicament as well. 

“I knew that you would be a worthy opponent,” Jeritza said before turning around and leaving them, more than unwilling to carry on with that conversation or having contact with other people as of then. “I appreciate the combat, professor.”

They watched as the man retreated with a limp, product of Byleth’s vicious assaults as much as the battles he had fought before. The former mercenary had no idea on what to do or say next, but simply kept looking until her colleague turned left in front of a tree and vanished from their sight, into the night that had seemed welcome before but had taken a turn to the unexpected. 

Suddenly the two women were aware of the fact that they were still staring at those parts of the woods in silence, unsure about how to proceed and which words would be appropriate. Even more so since the former mercenary had absolutely no idea about what had happened, what had gotten that response from her lover and what she must have done in order to have that result

Even so, she wasn’t one for dawdling and understood that they should get a move on as well, or risk being found outside the monastery grounds together once another day of work around Garreg Mach would begin. 

“Are you ok, El?” Byleth inquired as she tugged the girl’s hand, head tilting towards the trail they had all but abandoned in one point or another while taking that stroll. “We should go back.”

“Y-yes, that we should,” Edelgard answered and the other woman had no idea if she had ignored the first question by chance or had actually meant to leave it unanswered. 

She started betting it was the latter once too many steps were taken in quiet introspection again, with each of them more worried about where their feet were going and how many hours of night they probably had on them than in talking about it.

Yet no matter how much the princess’s mind coiled from the issue, from the accusation that had been uttered by her dearest, beloved Byleth, she had learned long ago that not talking wouldn’t really accomplish much except making them be drawn apart. And nothing would hurt more than that, more than the chasm that miscommunication could and would bring at times.

Although that was the case, words failed her for another few minutes as she fumbled with what to say, what to ask and if she shouldn’t wait for Byleth to tell her own side of the story instead of her asking for it. Even so she knew her lover and how talking could be tough for her too. Both would have to make an effort for it to work.

“You chan- no, allow me to begin this again,” El stopped herself just in time, realizing those words could make things harder on both of them. “I could see some changes happening during the flow of battle, my teacher. And while some of them were understandable, I would like to know more from you in regards to all of that.”

It took a moment or more for Byleth to not only nod at what she had heard as a sign of understanding, but to actually start thinking about an answer to it all. No good would come out of lying, especially with her having no actual basis to go from. “I’m sorry for whatever happened, Edelgard, but I have no recollection of it.”

The sentence was so abrupt and confusing, it made the princess stop on her tracks and fully turn around to face her lover, read her expression and determine if she was actually being serious. When she saw that it was the case, her heart lurched in pain, in sorrow and in a resignation of sorts. Feelings that she didn’t completely understand, but resonated inside her somewhere.

Somewhere… in a place where none of that would be happening and at the most, she and Byleth would be nothing more than teacher and student. And although it wasn’t the first time she had experienced something like that, it was surprising and unwelcome again, stabbing at her in a way that it shouldn’t be doing. 

“You cannot remember anything?” Most of her usual composure was gone by then, but fortunately that usually happened when the two of them were together - after so many years meeting in dreams, El felt safe enough to properly show her feelings around the woman anyways. “Not the fight against Jeritza, nor the moment you uh… almost killed him?” The way her eyes widened at that was answer enough if she ever needed any. “If I hadn’t stopped you -”

“You stopped me.” For the first time on that night something felt familiar, but not exactly the scene she was describing as of then. Just something else, somewhere else that was dark and had some tombstones, a green light coming from a stone throne, people fighting- 

The image was gone the second Byleth tried grasping for it, but even then she was surprised when the entire thing left a sour taste in the back of her mouth, something like anger traveling through her veins. 

_ No, she didn’t stop me, _ the professor thought without too much rhyme or reason behind that statement other than the fact that she knew it was right.  _ She opposed me. _

“I did,” El’s voice, her El’s voice, was soft and stable, not unlike the lost, warbling tone she had somehow heard in the back of her mind. “Or else you would have killed him without preambles… and me afterwards.”

Wait, was she implying…

“I would never raise a butter knife against you, El, much less a scythe,” the former mercenary said even though her body shivered in response and she did recall holding that strange weapon in her hand when she woke from her reverie. Maybe she had just overpowered the Knight and taken it to protect the one she loved.

Maybe she had been meaning to hit someone else and not Edelgard, but she did recall waking up to this world and seeing her lover on the floor, expression scared and tearful, a gash in her arm. Maybe she could go on making excuses for herself, albeit she wasn’t buying them as well - and neither was the scared, tentative girl standing some centimeters away from her. 

There was some pain and hurt in those lilac eyes once they settled on her own uneasy glance, one that wanted things to go back in time and be easier. “It happened, Byleth. I, I believe that you cannot remember, don’t worry about it. But you did almost hit me after saying something quite… scathing too.”

Although the evidence of a previous wound was visible on her arm and hall she clutched it, she knew better than to talk about that, how the professor had fought her off in a rather violent way after she stopped the woman from killing Jeritza.

Byleth didn’t quite know how to respond. She had seen the pain etched on her lover’s face, no matter how hard she had tried keeping it away from her eyes while addressing the knight - Jeritza. She had seen how she almost flinched away from the professor more than once, their gazes not meeting at all. It was almost as if both of them had been back to their first dream, when a young Edelgard had been too scared to open up to her.

Had something happened that reminded her of it? Or had she…

“Hey, don’t worry about it anymore,” Edelgard’s voice was soft, though her body language still suggested she wasn’t comfortable with the situation or what had occurred before. “I-if you said you cannot recall it then I suppose there is nothing to be done. Perhaps you meant something else or… the flow of the battle got to you in some way.”

They both knew these were nothing more than slight excuses, something meant to distract and appease, words that in the end would bring them a momentary peace of mind without solving the issue at hands. But in that moment in time, when they needed some sort of respite in order to go back to the monastery and start their next day, it would have to be enough.

Even so, they were physically, mentally and emotionally apart as they walked back to Garreg Mach, a sigh of relief leaving their lips at the same time once they spotted the familiar silver walls they had climbed out on what seemed like an eternity ago. A lifetime in which they had been close together plotting a night where they would be able to enjoy the beautiful nature around them, instead of their own quarters or the confines of the monastery.

After they had gone in and were safely behind the stable, no guards in sight or other students to tell on them, they stood looking at one another, unsure of what to say or do. 

It was when Edelgard shivered a bit too strongly against the slightly cold breeze which blew around her that Byleth eventually moved, slowly removing her coat. She took the slowest, most careful steps she could to cover the distance between them and placed it over the girl’s shoulder, then squeezed her arms and smiled once that was received with a small beam of appreciation too.

“I’m sorry for whatever it was that I did or said,” the professor uttered, contrite. She wished she could remember something, anything, about those minutes in which she hadn’t been there. No matter how much she tried, all she could come up with was a secluded place with little to no light. And a mask, one that she couldn’t quite see in the eyes of her mind.

“Hey, you really don’t have to -”

“No El, I do. I don’t want whatever happened back there to stay between us in that way. So please, forgive me. I didn’t mean any of that.” She knew it wasn’t enough, or it was possibly not enough depending on what had transpired but even so, it was the best she could do as of then. "Or…  _ that,  _ if I was the one responsible for it. But get it looked at, please." She pointed at Edelgard's left arm, her chest hurting as she recalled how the girl had been clutching it.

The princess looked at her, eyes furrowed in thought. The gesture, though theoretically unnecessary, was appreciated even so. Everything right there and then was too confusing for her, from Jeritza’s claims about some slither activity on villages near them - could she even ask her uncle about that? Or had that been the reason why he had visited the monastery a while ago, close to her birthday? - to Byleth’s strange reaction, actions and words to her. There wasn’t one thing in that list that she could make sense of. 

“I do, By,” she said after a moment, realizing it would be bad for her to not give the woman an answer. Especially when it looked like she was fretting about it too. “You are ok, really. The fact that you care is enough for me to know it wasn’t intentional,”  _ on some level _ , Edelgard’s mind filled in, though she kept it to herself in any case. It would do no good to either of them if she were to place any doubt in their minds.

“If I recall something, I will be more specific about it ok?” The former mercenary promised, tentatively moving so she could hold the girl’s hands on her own, caressing her knuckles as slowly and gently as she could afford to at the time. 

“Thank you again for the attention, my teacher,” Edelgard beamed right then, wishing to end the night on a better note than the one in which they had begun it. “Please do not think too much about it, we will solve this at some point. And I promise I will look after this,” she added when the woman's gaze fell on her forearm once more.

The fact that there shouldn’t even be something for them to solve to begin with lingered between them, an unspoken weight that they would rather not touch or mention so they wouldn't be tempted to go back to discussing the issue again. There was a chance they would do so in dreams - if they were able to fall asleep at all, which didn’t seem a feasible thing as well.

“Will you be ok?” The princess asked the moment Byleth pulled away and started edging away towards her quarters, offering her coat back as she had almost forgotten it, a sign of peace.

The professor froze for a second, realizing what she had been about to do, then nodded with a small smile on her lips as she reached out and put the cloak in the crook of her arm. “Yeah, don’t worry about me. If you need anything let me know.”

It was the first time they had parted without a kiss, not even a peck on the cheeks or a hug to say the least. Edelgard simply watched as Byleth’s form disappeared into the night, turning left when she walked next to a building with a forlorn expression in her face. The princess herself stood there a moment longer, the night breeze rushing against her cheeks, eyes lost on the horizon and the myriad possibilities, the thoughts that rushed through her mind at once and wanted to take her over, drown her even while in a safe space.

In a place that she had slowly grown to love, to cherish and that she would hate to leave since it had signified a respite from her life in the palace, from being under constant supervision of those that had harmed her and her family.. To think she was feeling at home right then, with not only the other Black Eagles but the students in general was completely unexpected, a welcome development after a lifetime of not knowing what home could mean.

She hoped the small pickpockets of light, of fire and screams that she sometimes saw and heard in her mind while walking through Garreg Mach, just as in that particular night, didn’t mean her peace would be shattered by anything too terrible, too unable to repair as time went by. 

The next morning, when a sleepless Byleth went to tell the Blue Lions what they would do in that day to help preparing the monastery for the Rite of Rebirth, she was taken aback when Mercedes waited until everyone else was gone in order to ask her a question, the one she least expected from the woman in front of her.

“Hey Professor! I do hope you don’t take this the wrong way as this has nothing to do with the quality of your teaching or anything of the sorts and more with my own ability to learn. But would you be upset if I sought instructor Jeritza for extra sword lessons?”

Her tone was sweet, her expression open in the kindest, most innocent smile one could aim at the stoic former mercenary. Byleth had half a mind to deny that request, images from last night echoing in her brain about how vicious the man in question seemed to be. She was sure there had been a fight between her and Jeritza, but unfortunately no memories had resurfaced in the time in which was lying down in bed, thinking about everything and nothing at all; as always Sothis had been sound asleep and no help at all. 

However, how was she supposed to justify her negative answer once she said it aloud? She knew Mercedes was passionate about what she wanted, to the point she would argue about it until she understood the situation in hand and had an opinion of her own about it. And there was nothing factual for Byleth to sustain her claim that it would be a bad idea, what with how motivated the student was. 

“As you wish,” the former mercenary said with a serious face, no matter how much the woman facing her was smiling and celebrating already. Two could play that game, though. “Can I ask you why the sudden interest?”

“Of course!” Mercie fell into step beside Byleth as soon as the professor motioned for them to keep moving, to go to the Entrance Hall they were meant to tidy up for that day. “So you might think it’s weird, but I feel like instructor Jeritza is someone familiar to me. And I’d like to see how his fighting style is, as Felix speaks so much about it too. It would also be fun for me to not only heal and use magic all the time too so.. I wanna pull my weight around the team as well, you see.”

Byleth was about to say that no such a thing would be necessary, that Mercedes was enough as it was and her assistance for a balanced group was as important as the fighters who took the front lines as well. That she didn’t have to feel bad about not using a weapon like some of her classmates did. But again, the determination on Mercie's face won her over - and if she thought there was a connection of sorts between her and Jeritza, something she decided to ask Edelgard about the next time they met, so be it.

“I don’t see any problem about it,” the former mercenary said, nodding, her face stable in a way that wouldn’t alert her perceptive student that perhaps she had more than enough reservations about the entire ordeal.

More than enough questions to ask a certain someone, even though she was still wondering if she should even press the matter given how things had ended the night before. 

“Great! Thank you so very much, professor. I’ll talk to him today and let him know I got your permission for it as well,” Mercedes started walking away while humming to herself in joy, until Byleth remembered something and called her over.

“If it’s ok with you, I’d like to evaluate your prowess with the sword once in a while, ok? Just to make sure those classes are being worth it and you aren’t overexerting yourself due to something so minor. You’re great as you are, Mercedes,” Byleth added, watched in surprise when the student seemed taken aback with that remark. “We should get going before Seteth or someone else orders us to go back to work.”

That last sentence made the woman chuckle, then follow the professor around with newfound admiration and gratitude in her heart. 

* * *

“Ugh, I still can’t believe Your Princelinesses are putting up with this without complaint though.”

Edelgard rolled her eyes at Claude’s insinuation, knowing she shouldn’t be bothered by it to begin with. The thing was, she was sure the little jabs he had been throwing all morning long made her feel a little bit annoyed because of what had happened last night. Because of the doubts which still ran over her mind and had kept her awake for the last three or four hours of respite she had had before the day began. 

That, plus having to keep cleaning and organizing without wincing in pain due to the thin gash on her arm (and letting Hubert off her back when it came to it too) was slowly making her lose her patience.

“Well, it isn’t as if we could say no, though I do wonder why only Dimitri and I seem to be doing something useful around here,” the girl said, rolling her eyes while getting a bigger chunk of rubble from the ground. Who had let the Saint Statues get that bad to begin with?

"Because you rushed in to help and honestly, who am I to stop ya?” He winked the second both turned around to look at him, the princess with a raised eyebrow and the prince with a frown. “You’re the best of the best and all I can do is bow -”

“Oh cut it and get a broom, Claude,” Dimitri said while Edelgard huffed - it was the second day the three house leaders had been assigned to work together and he had half a mind to ask Byleth who had thought that was a good idea. 

Though there was a chance that had been the former mercenary’s doing as well, but even so. There was no way the three could coexist peacefully, even more so when one of them didn’t do what had been expected of them.

On that warm summer morning they had been confined to the cathedral and asked to make it as clean and organized as humanly possible since a great part of the ritual would take place there. While that was decidedly better than having to do something under intense sunlight - the fact that the building had side entrances meant a lot of wind reached them from time to time, cooling them down - it wasn’t exactly how they thought they would be spending their mornings when they had applied to the Officers Academy.

“Jeez, ok then, no worries.” Claude stepped closer to the other boy and snatched the broom away from his hand so fast, the prince could only gasp in surprise at the sudden movement. “Why don’t you rest so I can keep this up?”

The princess had a moment to smirk to herself when she heard Dimitri mumble some semi-coherent thanks and take a seat on the floor, watching as the future Duke took over his duties and the princess kept on separating the biggest slices of marble rubble that she could find. 

“The Church of Seiros…” Claude mused, his tone light and hinting at what had been on his mind for the last few months. “I heard it was full of secrets and a kinda weird past but I never thought it would be like that.”

“Whatever are you talking about now?” El inquired, more out of curiosity and at the fact that those words were truer than many could even think than an actual interest at discussing the topic. She had decided long ago that it wasn’t the church’s place to rule the world, militarily and ideologically. 

The fact it did so on both fronts would only mean she had more work to do than to simply undermine a series of unfounded beliefs one could just dismantle with facts. 

“All of it, honestly. I mean, think about it, isn’t it odd to you that we are here, being mobilized to clean the school so a religious festival can be held? Professor Hanneman anticipated all of our exams because of that and we were legit killed -”

“The entire school has already heard that your score was only second to Lysithea’s, which is’t surprising,” Edelgard shot back, knowing that was just some theatrics so he could dance around the subject. “As for your previous point, there are people out there trying to kill the archbishop - surely that justifies them mobilizing students.”

“Does it, though?” Dimitri stepped in after making sure no one from the church was actually listening in. “I still think it rather atypical and ill-advised, but that is just my opinion.”

“Plenty of the things the church says are atypical if you stop to think about it.” Claude placed the broom he had picked up for thirty seconds against the wall, then paced around them with a thoughtful expression in his face. “There’s just so much we can actually justify if you read it far enough. Why is Nemesis seen as a Hero if later he turned against Seiros? Why are the Hero Relics still considered gifts from the Goddess herself if they were used against Her Children later on? What does the church hope to accomplish by letting families keep it?”

Both were quiet, though between the princess and the prince one of them had all the answers he sought. Not that Edelgard was about to start talking either - she knew better than to risk her sources, or worse, her schemes just because Claude seemed interested in ancient history.

“They were used against the false Gods first, or at least so does the sacred texts say,” Dimitri replied, eyes lost in the columns and etching on the wall in front of him. All that history and the lore behind it, documented in art, in literature, poetry, songs, hymns, operas…

No matter where one was from, a lot of Fódlan’s cultural background revolved around the church and its teachings, what it held as the sacred, blessed path that the Goddess watched upon.

As a child he had believed it could be the case, that there was actually Goddess out there that took care of all. As a teenager who had lost his parents to a terrible disaster that had marked his soul - and to that day he had yet to find some comfort from it through praying, as many had advised him to do more than once - he wasn’t as sure. Nowadays, while studying in the monastery and already bearing witness to the things the church could ask of its followers, it would be a miracle if he thought about the Goddess at all throughout the months that passed.

“A lie told several times becomes some sort of truth,” Claude replied, as if reading from scripture. “The history of Fódlan itself seems to be too linked to the religious one. It’s kinda hard to tell when one begins and the other ends.”

“Is it only our history, though?” Edelgard rhetorically inquired, getting their attention at once. “Our political systems are entrenched with it. Enbarr - and the Empire per se - was created first because of the so-called alliance between Seiros and my ancestor. Crests, those mysterious things that are also seen as gift from the goddess determine if one will be in power or just be a commoner, no matter how talented they are.”

“Or if they will become the next in succession for the family in question too,” the prince added, folding his arms. “In Faerghus, those territories that stand close to the borders are tasked with guarding it; as a result, only crest-bearers are seen as important, good or fitting to keep the family going.”

He had seen that dispute between Miklan and Sylvain one too many times when they were kids, growing up without too much understanding of why things were the way they were. At times Felix’s brother had even intervened, pulling the oldest Gautier away from his younger brother before Sylvain could be seriously harmed.

“But even so, I don’t think there is something inherently bad about the church,” Dimitri went on, unsure about whether or not it would be interesting, or even productive for them to continue that conversation whatsoever. “It just has its mysteries. Perhaps most, if not all of it got lost to time and translations, to the point that many texts could be misinterpreted.”

“I don’t know, something about it doesn’t smell good to me at all,” Claude continued, wishing the argument wouldn’t simply end with something like that. “Feels too easy to just blame that. Like the so-called Immaculate One. What even is that? It's mentioned in so many pieces but doesn’t appear in illustrations or the sorts. Why is it being hidden when the church is more than blatant about displaying its power for everyone to see?”

“It must have its reasons,” Edelgard said absent-mindedly, staring at the statue in front of her.  _ Cichol indeed,  _ she smirked at the thought and brushed it aside, knowing she had to be careful about how much she talked - Claude could read a stone and tell its story in an accurate way. 

“Ah, so you do agree with -”

“While I do think this is a very interesting group dynamic the professors have suggested,  _ I _ would suggest you actually do what was asked of you instead of turning this into a group discussion. Keep at it, von Hresvelg.”

The stern, familiar voice of none other than Seteth himself startled Dimitri and made Claude give a sheepish smile. Edelgard simply continued her job gathering rocks, one she had never stopped even when the boys kept talking, and beamed the slightest at the man’s remark as he trudged away with irritation behind his steps.

“Have you never heard that the monastery has ears?” The princess whispered, smug even though she had a growing certainty that they had indeed been completely overheard. 

“Oh you could have said that before couldn’t you?” Claude rolled his eyes heavenwards as both Dimitri and El chuckled. His gaze was focused on the small image of the Goddess above them, a beautiful woman in a white dress, green hair billowing in the wind, hands extended to encompass the entirety of the continent.

Was it really what that image was supposed to represent?

* * *

No matter how much they worked during the day and how some of the professors did try giving them shorter essays to do in the afternoons, the students did their best to get their own studying in. The training grounds became extra packed after twilight, the same happening to the library until it became too much and no one was able to focus. That was when they started doing revisions around the monastery grounds, sitting in front of the Officers Academy classrooms with a candle or two, piles of books, quills and papers they used to take notes on.

If one were to glance at the open areas around Garreg Mach at night, they would see myriad flames dancing on the lazy breeze, almost like star lights on the floor instead of in the sky. They would hear friends helping, calming and quizzing each other, the wind rushing over the grass and carrying over their loose sheets of paper if it sped up due to a spell or another. 

While it was a quite chaotic method when compared to them staying inside classrooms or the library itself, it was also the way the students found to decompress after a day of doing chores and being away from their weapons and books. Summer proved to be a lovely season, though the nights were also too warm for one to feel at ease indoors. 

Byleth would parade through rows of pupils and be asked questions all the way to her dorm room, something that she found funny and always made her laugh no matter how pensive she had been before. She and Edelgard had yet to try another excursion at night - or outside of the monastery for that matter - and had gone back to seeing each other in dreams or the few times they met throughout the days.

While it was lonesome and they missed one another terribly, it at least gave them time to wonder about what had happened that night, then eventually forget it once they got too busy to recall anything other than important details for the next test or what one would be required to do the next day.

And even though at first everyone had complained about how long of a month that would be without classes, with mostly manual labors to be done, soon enough the 26th of the Blue Sea Moon arrived and with it, the Rite of Rebirth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's the end of that little scene xD sorry for the long cliffhanger, guys hehe. Now imagine if the three house leaders talked more between themselves hahaha... Unless xD
> 
> But no, I think they'd come up with some interesting theories without Edelgard saying too much about what she knows, but that's me just wondering about the game again hahaha
> 
> Again, thank you for reading and have a great weekend!


	9. Blame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Rite of Rebirth finally arrives and the students speak before their professors arrive to take them away. 
> 
> The Blue Lions fight the actual culprits in the Holy Mausoleum and the night shows more secrets than they expected.

Religion had stopped being a thing for Edelgard the moment she was imprisoned in the dungeons of Enbarr with her siblings, forced to watch them die while she herself died a little as well every day, as every cut and bruise was etched into her body, as they tampered with her blood and the experiments began anew. Although she had been surprised at the fact that Byleth knew nothing about the church of Seiros and the Goddess back then, this fact had soon become some sort of solace for her.

It showed the princess that it would be ok for her to not think about religion, nor to feel obliged to guide her life in accordance to it, to rituals and ceremonial antics. In the end those were more a nuisance, the futile attempt to get the attention of a deity that perhaps wasn’t even there to begin with, than something to actually be taken seriously.

Sure, that meant she was usually beyond bored when Rhea showed up and interrupted a lecture or another to brag about the importance of leading a life in the holy path of Sothis, and that she would rather spend time with her uncle than to be forced to attend services. Both were equally despicable for different reasons but at least she knew how to navigate the usual feelings of misery and meaninglessness that he always brought up on her. 

The sheer hopelessness she experienced when prayers were said, the same one that had taken her over when she had recited all the sacred texts she knew by heart while down at the dungeon, was something else, something way more terrible for her to deal with.

As a result she was rather thankful the moment Rhea had told the students to assemble in the reception hall a day before the Rite of Rebirth, then assigned them roles for the following night. And as it was, the Black Eagles were given sentry duty in the main gate, far, far away from anything religious in nature and place too. 

Whereas some of her classmates had complained and wished they could have been in the cathedral to guard lady Rhea against any potential threat, she had sighed in relief at the revelation and calmed her friends with promises of a nicer mission next month. 

Her gratitude was short-lived, however, when the Blue Lions were told to stand guard in front of the Holy Mausoleum and the Golden Deer, to be alongside the Knights of Seiros in the cathedral itself. 

She knew she shouldn’t really care that much. That Byleth had already been warned of what she would possibly find in the place she was supposed to stay in front of in a few minutes. It was likely the scapegoats from the Western Church were already in position right then, while they waited in the entrance hall for the gates to open, for the festival and the rite to begin. 

It was a warm night again, or maybe the room was warm given how restless the students were. All around Edelgard her fellow classmates and those from the other houses stood in clusters either nervously shifting their weight from foot to foot, brooding over their coming exams and how each professor had doomed them in a different way, or trying to make some conversation with other house members. 

The princess herself was standing close to the door, watching the night unfold and the movement from the few merchants that were wrapping their belongings before attending festivities, the usual guards lighting up torches as night finally fell with its soothing mantle of blue and the stars, a soft breeze that spoke of the rain to come in the next month and the rainbows that would adorn the sky in their myriad promises of the days to come. 

She could already hear the whispers of voices beyond the gates, the excitement behind the shrill screams of some kids, the whining of others that would rather be playing, snug in their beds or somewhere else other than in the church so late at night. Some parents yelled louder than the children, promising them treats and food in order to make them stand still. It reminded her of the few times she and her siblings had been dragged into a makeshift ritual by a tutor or another - though the Hresvelgs weren’t religious, they were taught the ropes more so they could mingle with the rest of the nobility and those from other territories.

“Edelgard, good evening.”

The voice startled her out of those thoughts, a welcome reprieve before they could get darker in a night that would already be troublesome in some way or another. None of those feelings were visible in her eyes when she turned to face the one who had spoken, a small, polite smile on her lips instead.

“Dimitri, hello. Are you nervous about the assignment tonight?” She inquired and watched him take the few steps that separated them. 

For some seconds he admired the night as well, the hustle of those still working in the same way that the students had been for the last few days. She wondered what he saw, what he thought about the entire ritual and the connotations of religion as well.

Sure, he was the future kind of the so-called Holy Kingdom of Faerghus, yet she knew enough history - and more than enough, more than most - to understand that the territory had been through an unspeakable hardship four years ago. One that the church had responded by simply offering condolences, blaming some minor nobles or people from minor families for what had happened. While that was more than what Edelgard could say when it came to her and her siblings, whose deaths hadn’t even been acknowledged by the church, one could expect a little bit more from the clergy since the Kingdom had pretty much dedicated itself to Seiros in a way or another.

In her eyes, that was nothing but another flaw to be stacked up in the long list of accusations she already had against the entire organization.

“It would be a lie if I said that I wasn’t, especially since we have determined that the assassination letter was nothing but a ruse,” he informed her, unsure of how much she and the other students already knew. It was no secret that spending the entire month closer to others while doing stupid chores had brought them all together, meaning that occasionally someone from the Blue Lions would let it slip that the letter was rumored to be fake, but even so. 

“Yes, that is what I have heard at the very least. But it is always good to keep one’s eyes open, especially in a place such as Garreg Mach, wouldn’t you say?” She inquired, as recently she had heard from Byleth that he was looking for those responsible for his past in the walls of the monastery. 

While he wasn’t entirely wrong about doing some research, she doubted she would find anything in the books curated by the church itself, but who was she to say something at all about it? 

“Y-yes, but enough about that. I was wondering if we could reminisce some more. I have been meaning to talk to you about it throughout the weeks but -”

“It has been quite a tiresome last couple of days, has it not? And it isn’t as if we have enjoyed some privacy to talk about such matters either, I suppose,” Edelgard mused, as Claude had pretty much been tagging along the two of them (mostly for Dimitri's sake, she could tell) for the whole time they had been stuck outside of their classrooms. She couldn’t help but smile whenever she saw them, the way the future duke joked around the prince as well.

Sometimes it reminded Edelgard of those nights in which she and Byleth were getting to know each other better, when the older girl had kept telling her silly jokes in dreams so she could relax and eventually smile. She missed those long gone days when things hadn’t been easier, but it seemed like she could get some sort of peace when her eyes closed knowing she would see her friend one more time.

When there was no war looming in front of them, merely a breath or a sigh away from their reach.

Talking about the past, while therapeutic and nostalgic at the most (and it completely pointed to Byleth’s interference as well), wasn’t something she wished to do with someone she could barely remember, though. Which was why her defenses shot up at the prospect and she decided to take control of the situation before he could. “I do not recall too much of our time together, unfortunately. Would you care to tell me about how we first met?”

He was more than happy to indulge her, launching into a short description of lord Arundel almost forcing her out of a carriage and telling her to behave in front of the prince. How she had almost stormed off as if to defy those words, but her eyes had been so full of fear and unease due to the new location that Dimitri had offered her a hand and said he’d be more than happy to show her around.

“You were eager to let me know that the Enbarr palace was a lot bigger and prettier too, what with all the portraits you had on the wall and depictions of important wars as well,” Dimitri went on, causing them both to chuckle at the recollection. He wondered if the small, distant light behind her lilac irises right then was any indication that his words were getting through, were stirring something inside her as much as they were inside him. Recalling a better, unmarred past was both a delight and an anguish since he knew what came next. “Then you asked me where we could both find swords so we could reenact such conflicts.”

“Did I ever let you win our own version of the War of Eagle and Lion?” She inquired, both genuinely curious and wanting to ease her mind away from thoughts about that night. Things would be ok. Byleth was a more than capable fighter and no harm would come to her or her students. The princess had specifically told the Death Knight to never lay a hand on the professor again either, and he had yet to fail carrying an order to that day.

It would be fine, she would be fine and find Byleth safe and sound in her dreams again once this was all over and the slithers got what they wanted out of the expedition.

“No, you weren’t one for historical accuracy back then,” Dimitri replied, noticing the way her gaze kept shifting between him, the gates and the sky above. It wasn’t like her to show nervousness like that. “You said that me being shorter and weaker than you was already inaccurate to begin with.”

“Heh, not that I can disagree with my younger self, but apologies for making things tougher in the beginning,” Edelgard beamed and this time it was a little more genuine. A little more grounded and less polite.

The beam was answered in kind, as the prince recalled how tough it had been to get to the princess, to make her relax and stop being suspicious of everything around her. It wasn’t lost on him how she was equally still in that moment, her body language nodding to a concern she wouldn’t voice. One that he hoped he could ease.

“Not to worry. I was told to give you time and space to adjust, that being away from home must be difficult for you given how young we both were,” Dimitri reassured her. “Though I was never told why you went there to begin with.”

Edelgard faltered and turned to look at him, pondering over the dilemma she was presented with. She would be forever grateful that none other than the prince of Faerghus was offering her childhood back piece by small piece, so she could have a glimpse of times that weren’t as sad as she had been made to believe. Yet it didn’t mean she considered him close enough to know about all there was to her life, to the things she had kept away from everyone no matter how much they pried. 

Though there wasn’t any damage to be done if she were talking historical, widely known facts, was there? “The time I spent there also saw a group of nobles start doing everything in their power to undermine my father. It wasn’t exactly the year in which the Emperor lost his power and the throne, but it was when the initial seed was planted and doubt was cast across the Empire. So I do believe my… stay was either my uncle’s attempt to protect me, or a measure to keep my father from doing something that could defy their orders or fight back against the nobles.”

Dimitri didn’t know what to say after that, how to respond to what was being spoken in between the lines, what was implied and what had come after it. He had heard more than studied about the so-called Insurrection of the Seven, the role it had had on internal and external Imperial politics.

He stared ahead again, unwilling to meet her eyes not in fear of what he would see in them but what she would perceive in his own expression, as his feelings ran on their own volition within his chest, pooling in a heart that beat with a cold, painful thud, guilt and sadness making their nests in it.

When too many seconds had been spent in silence for it to be socially acceptable, he finally opened his mouth and said the only words that seemed appropriate in that moment, as his brain juggled with the implications of her words. “I am really sorry, Edelgard,” he whispered, hating the pity he could hear in his voice. “I had no idea -”

“No, please do not apologize.” Her tone was soft, even though the weight of the implications that episode brought into her life were still etched in her irises, a darker, broodier violet than usual. “You were not the one to tinker with the Empire and its internal politics to begin with. Moreover, that is all in the past and there is no use to dwelling on it. Is there anything else you remember from those days?” She inquired, trying to change the subject into something that was easier to deal with. 

She had thought it would be ok to reveal that part of herself. That she wouldn’t suffer, or try backing away as she was at that moment in time. though the unnecessary guilt in his entire demeanor was making everything worse.

There was something about unveiling her past to the prince of Faerghus that sat heavily on her chest, almost bringing new memories for her. As if warning her of other times, of blues, blacks and reds dancing, waltzing, fighting to a rhythm that although familiar, didn’t feel right. She couldn’t understand that eerie sensation, even more so when a glance back at Dimitri’s eyes revealed something of the sort had taken over him as well. Maybe it was just her mind, her old habit of placing barriers against others anyways.

“I… recall how much you spoke of your siblings back then. You described them with so much love and care, so many details as well, it was almost as if they were my friends.” He saw that it had been the wrong move as soon as he was done uttering those words, but had wanted to discuss that with her for a while now. “I have heard of the terrible illness that plagued them and wanted to offer my condolences.”

“The sentiment is appreciated.” Edelgard retorted, her tone flat. She held herself in place even though her entire body screamed at her to move. 

She couldn’t understand that at all. Why had he felt the need to say it? Everyone knew the lies her uncle had fabricated to do away with why almost every single child of Emperor Ionius had died. The Kingdom and Alliance had offered their support and kind words already. There was no reason for the prince to say anything else on the matter.

But anyways, at least that gave her the opening to talk about something else. “Likewise, I would like to express my sincerest condolences on the Tragedy of Duscur. Since we are apologizing for such episodes.” 

He blinked at her in surprise, unsure of why that had been mentioned after all - though that did make it two of them. The beam which colored his lips failed to reach his eyes, remained there for one second before his irises were narrowed in pain and defiance. “Thank you. To this day I search for the perpetrators, the actual people to be blamed for all that happened back then. No matter how much evidence comes to life, I still cannot be convinced that the Duscarians were truly behind it.”

“There are a lot of dead ends about the guilty party, unfortunately. I would say you should trust your instincts and know that I hope you find them one day. You of all people deserve to know the truth.” She was mesmerized not by the fire in his irises, which had appeared when those words were uttered, but by the dark and familiar feeling that unveiled inside her as a response.

His wish wasn’t to find those perpetrators, she knew. It was to punish them.

That was a sentiment she understood, though unknown to him the people who were really responsible for the massacre in the Kingdom had done horrible things to the Empire as well. A part of her was thankful the former had at least survived those attacks, for the lack of a better word.

“Yes, I can only remain hopeful and vigilant. Something in the Officers Academy might be of help as well. Who knows. Well, I think the professors are to return soon and escort us to our locations. May everything run smoothly for you, Edelgard.” He bowed, aware of how painful the subject was to her.

“I wish you the same. Stay safe.” She returned the movement and paced away, then thought better and let words that had been echoing inside her mind, beating in her chest, leave through her lips before she could second guess herself again: “And oh, Dimitri? Do not search far. Those people might be closer than you think and be responsible for more as well.”

She turned his back on him and walked more briskly to the door, as Manuela showed up and regrouped the scattered Black Eagles. A look at the former diva’s side and he spotted Byleth, motioning for the Blue Lions to do the same. His mind operated on autopilot and he obeyed, trying to process what he had just heard. The words which had been next on his lips, what he hoped would be an innocent enough question ("why have you changed your hair color?") completely silenced as he watched the princess and the rest of the Black Eagles being ushered away.

There was no time for him to recover or make his mind about the entire encounter, though Byleth did cast him a knowing glance since she had seen the end of the conversation after all. He grimaced while falling into step behind her, unsure of what to think in regards to the outcome of the whole exchange anyways. 

He shook his head as Sylvain, Felix and Ingrid got closer, their weapons already drawn to attention. Whereas they had been trying their best to mingle and talk with others before Byleth arrived, every semblance of relaxation had already evaporated and been replaced by tension in their shoulders and the strength with which they were gripping their weapons. The winds changed as Annette called some magic of her own and they could feel tendrils of it caressing their skin once they left the building and went into the warm night.

The thing with messing with the past, something that Dimitri had learned as of recent, was that it had a tendency to leave an imprint on one’s mind for a little while at the very least. That was why the prince didn’t even notice how they walked through the changed monastery, the tents that had been put around the stables and places such as the Officers Academy and the yard before the dais which lead to the cathedral as well. He missed how the view from the bridge was beautiful on that night, the stars shining above them and the cathedral alight with flames and magical lights as it was prepared for the ceremony to come. 

They went to the side of the building and eventually fell in front of the Holy Mausoleum, the heavy, imposing doors that were always locked imposing in how they were adorned with symbols from crests on carved wood. 

They stood still for a second, watching and waiting for some sign that it had already been meddled with in one way or another. Around them there was only silence since people had yet to file into the monastery and the cathedral for the ritual to start. That moment of anticipation and uncertainty was what brought the prince back to reality and what was going on around him, the fact that he was no longer in the entrance hall but right at the place they had determined would more than likely get attacked.

It was only when they heard a faint, whispering voice coming from the inside that Byleth pressed forward, finding the doors surprisingly easy to open despite how heavy they had looked before. And when she and those in front of the line glanced inside…

Candles illuminated lines of urns, shining golden and bronze under that glare, one that perhaps shouldn’t even be there to begin with. There were fissures on the ground, which showed signals of being unkempt and cracked; there seemed to be a dais making its way from the door to a raised platform in the end of the spacious room. 

The same platform in which a mage dressed in black robes and a strange mask tried prying open something… something that looked like a coffin of sorts, if they were seeing things correctly from their advantage point.

That view made something snap inside of the prince, as rage roared through his chest and made him race inside the room even if Byleth gave him a warning look and tried restraining him with an arm that he swatted aside. His eyes were already twisted within a mist of their own, a dangerous one that harkened to some other time, to other circumstances when a more detached attitude on his end was required. 

To other times when he had needed to make through the next opponent and the next in order to quell the desire to destroy which was in his heart.

There was no stopping him, nor did the rest of the students attempt to do it the second they realized what was going on, Dimitri alone battling and ending three fighters that had been hiding in the darkened areas of the room and behind some urns. It was almost as if they had been waiting for the students, as if they knew there might be some opponents for them to fight against.

Byleth didn’t even need to tell them to go and engage in combat, as the pupils fell into an easy formation that allowed all of them to shine in their own spots and to the best of their abilities. Felix, Sylvain and Ingrid lifted their weapons against armed soldiers dressed in white, their clothings somewhat familiar even though the mercenary couldn’t really understand why, the ease with which the three fought together speaking of years spent training side by side.

Annette, Ashe and Mercedes stood behind, lacing magic with arrows that hit true and incapacitated enermies from afar, before some of the other allies could even get to them. Dedue soon rushed after Dimitri, but was derailed by a string of enemies that had been ignored by the prince - which the tall man mercilessly punched without a second thought. Even more so when he got close to his liege and was finally able to cover for him, to get to any assailants that dared swinging a weapon or some magic at Dimitri.

Byleth herself took the center flank so she could keep an eye on everyone else, especially the students who tended to stand behind and not engage in close combat. The steel sword was on her hand before she could realize she had gotten it, her arms lifting to party a blow, countering it with a lethal one of her own.

However, there was little any of them could do since Dimitri was rushing through the enemy lines and dispersing, dismantling and ending soldiers without too much thought or order to his moves. It was a contrast to the more controlled, precise way that he wielded his lance during practice matches; though not something new after watching his performance on the mock battle, it was still a shock to see the brutality in his eyes, the hazy glance, the cruel smirk on his lips and the violent stabs and swings of his lance.

The professor was at a loss about what she should actually do, sure that calling out to him wouldn’t be enough - nor should she let him keep going through that path of destruction and self destruction as well. The moment she sent an enemy flying with a kick and was about to call his attention, however, a familiar figure came into sight near the raised platform and made her breath catch in a gasp.

Sure, she had been warned by Edelgard that there was a high chance the Death Knight would be there to supervise the mission, to give the slithers a report. It was one thing to know that, another altogether to see him there, his black armor shining darker than the shadowy room, the ominous mask and the scythe making him a fearful sight on itself. 

When he swung at Dimitri and almost hit him, if the prince hadn’t seen the weapon shining with ominous purple energy before stepping aside, was what Byleth had needed to spring into action, swerve away from her path and dash so she was the one to parry the next move that the knight did.

Dimitri’s grunt of protest at being kept away from the Death Knight died away once the professor shoved him, silently urging him to step aside from that area and deal with other enemies before that got too bad. He had half a mind to protest, his entire body screaming at how that had been unnecessary and he could more than handle someone like that, but words were kept away from him, becoming actions as new soldiers tried hitting him from the sides. 

As much as he hated the position he was in there was nothing more to do than fight, ending the ones that were threatening the church and that holy place of rest.

Meanwhile, Byleth and the Death Knight danced to a rhythm of their own, to a fight where blows were diverted last second and no real harm was done. The man had promised Edelgard that the mercenary wouldn’t be touched and he intended to keep his words even if it meant going against what his heart desired. That girl had saved him; the least he could do was follow her wishes and her views for a better place in this world. 

“I have orders to not… actually harm you,” he whispered once the woman was close enough for them to talk, parrying a forward slash. Behind them, the sounds of the wind gathering into gales and gusts, of metal meeting metal as the battle went on and all the grunts of exertion and pain made up the melody they danced to, an unintended waltz.

“That makes it two of us.” Byleth didn’t trust him the slightest, even if now she knew his story. But she understood he was valuable to the princess, to her plans and all that was to come. So they kept their distance during the day and would do the same then, at night. “I’d like it if you left my students out of it too.”

“That is not something I can promise.” Jeritza dodged her move, a stab that had meant to his heart, chuckling at her audacity. “Also, I bring a warning to you and the princess.”

“Go on then. I don’t have time to waste with you.” She spat back, getting closer and actually hitting him with the hilt of the sword. The strength behind her moves was enough to make him stagger backwards.

Fleeting anger passed through his visor, threatened to overpower him, making the convoluted energy which surrounded him almost too heavy to be around. Moreover, Byleth was interested in the mage standing on the raised platform, mouth moving in quick words as magic dark as pitch flowed from his palms, into the tomb beneath him. She really did feel like the matter was urgent, that she couldn’t dawdle with someone she shouldn’t even be fighting to begin with.

“They know about you and my master,” he mumbled again, feigned sustaining a wound on his arm by slumping his posture and touching said place. “They’re curious, whispering. Be careful.”

With that as a warning and his farewell words, the Death Knight grunted and disappeared before she could try hurting him once more. There was a dense purple mist in his place for a while, blinding her for a few seconds before she heard Ingrid’s grunt of pain somewhere beside her. Turning around, she gently pushed the girl behind her and broke a wind spell with a swing of her sword, then rushed to the attacking mage and brought down her weapon before they could think about attacking once more. 

“Are you ok?” She asked once she turned to Ingrid, noticing there was some blood on her arm, ignoring her nod given how pale and spent she looked. 

The woman was about to ask her to go seek some healing when the room was enveloped by cruel, chilly cold. One that wasn’t the same she felt in winter or fall, but had sensed once inside a dungeon many years ago, in a place just as dark and ominous as the mausoleum was starting to become. When her eyes fell on the platform and she saw the mage from before, the purple energy that surrounded him and the words he mumbled, she somehow understood it wasn’t the place that was cold, but that person’s magic that was making it become like that.

Candlelight faltered, almost completely vanished and left the place in total darkness as the mage’s different, dull powers enveloped the white casket in front of them and pried at it, eventually cracking the material due to how powerful it was - or how long they had been insisting for it to happen. 

Ingrid and Byleth moved on autopilot, fighting the fatigue settling in their bodies for the battle beforehand, their minds trying to grasp what was really happening and what they were seeing in front of their very eyes, how they could counter that and make sure those invaders wouldn’t get the most of it. 

The mage reached inside and, transfixed, upended a sword from the casket, holding it against the soft light. 

The moment Byleth’s eyes fell upon it, she felt a ripple of recognition run through her. Engulf her senses. Engulf her, as a whole, her soul resonating with the sword as if it were a part of her. A portion of who she was, almost physically so. 

_“This is…”_ Sothis whispered, her voice so strong it was hard to believe she wasn’t standing beside the former mercenary. Her thoughts so loud, the professor could barely distinguish them from her own. The jumbled, confused mess on the girl’s mind merging with hers as if they were so close, they could touch each other’s essences. 

There was no time to indulge in that, though. As if led by instinct, or Sothis herself, Byleth ran to the mage with her puny steel sword in hands and swatted at them, luckily managing to make the person stumble and fall. The ancient-looking sword rose in the air and fell into her hand, called by her in a way. The ashen, jutting pieces that made it up reminded her of unpolished rocks, something solid, rough and lethal.

The empty space in the hilt was a surprise that shook her. It shouldn’t be like that, she thought as she observed it, feeling a strange hum course through her body, mind and soul. Yes, the weapon belonged there. She belonged with it even if something was missing, or maybe with her alongside it nothing more was.

A gasp of surprise from Ingrid drew her attention back to the present, a much-needed grounding. The mage was back to their feet, face obscured by a pointed mask, purple lights pouring over their black robes as dark magic was called and aimed at her, then thrown without remorse. 

They were too close for Byleth to be able to sidestep that. Or rather… did she want to dodge when she could attack? The sword slashed on its own volition and completely dispersed the magic hurled her way. She could feel her students staring at her with awe, even more so when the weapon glowed crimson and almost seemed to surround her with its own light. 

It was powerful, alone. It was heady, confusing and mesmerizing at the same time. But in her hand, together with whatever power Professor Hanneman seemed to insist she wielded as well… Byleth could feel herself slipping, her consciousness being cast aside by the sheer energy that weapon exuded. And it wanted her in the same way a part of her wanted it.

The professor didn’t register the next few minutes. How her feet moved lighter, faster, smoother than her students had ever seen in battle or practice. How the sword seemed to be a part of her own body more than any other weapon she had used, her strikes precise, meeting flesh and bone and continuing to do so even when the mage that had threatened them was already far past the point of merely being dead. Yet she continued, sword as weightless in her hands as her mind was at that moment. 

She wasn’t there, not completely. Something – someone else was. The students stared in horror as blood flowed from the raised platform, around the sword’s edge, on their teacher’s neck, arms and face. Some of them wanted to run, but right then they heard steps approaching as well.

Somewhere along that Byleth finally stopped moving, as if suddenly too tired to do so. Ingrid took a look at her classmates’ faces and knew no one would have the necessary courage or maybe foolishness to step up to her. Which was exactly why the knight approached the former mercenary, as light on her feet as she could be, and tentatively placed one hand on her shoulder, squeezing it.

A single, wrong movement and she could be dead, she knew. The sight in front of her was already something out of her worst nightmares, ones that harkened to a past she would rather forget. Ones that showed Glenn, her Glenn, being slaughtered in such a fashion. She had to take a deep breath before going on, thus her voice was small and almost not there:

“P- professor? Please, wake up… come back to us. Everything’s fine now.” There was a slight response, a fast twitch of an eye, but it was there all the same. “You’ve more than protected us – and this place too.” She added, remembering how the woman had once spoken about always doing her best to keep them safe, even though battles were dangerous by nature and there was only so much one could do.

“Professor? You’re not alone.” Ingrid went on, her heart becoming calmer with each passing second that she remained alive and Byleth's body started relaxing under her touch, her skin pale against the crimson blood on her and the grey stony floor she kneeled under.

There was another moment of stillness before Byleth eased her grip on the sword; it fell from her hands and hit the floor. Her indigo eyes, usually so stoic and closed, were foggy, marred by confusion and the fact she had absolutely no idea what had happened after the coffin had been opened. 

Or why not one, but all of her students had scared expressions on their faces. 

* * *

It had been a pretty uneventful night if one were to ask Dorothea, to the point that she had almost fallen asleep while on her feet in front of the gates. She and the other Balck Eagles alongside professor Manuela had been tasked with standing guard, inspecting the people that arrived and bidding them a good night as if having students around for such a task was usual protocol. 

Not only was it a weird way to go about things, as it wasn’t like they were doing any sort of checking on those that went inside the monastery and just keeping an eye on everything, it was also useless, a grand waste of time. Sure, Dorothea was happy not to be at the cathedral or the Holy Mausoleum since there was a chance more things would be going on in those places - and she had already had one hell of a month just preparing the monastery for the ritual and what was to come, thank you very much. 

Yet it was still anticlimactic to stand there like a stupid doll, beaming and wishing everyone a good stay, period. Was it really what all of their patrolling, worrying and redoubling security had come down to? She felt as if she were back at the Mittelfrank, at least during the first few days of her career there, when she had had to do the exact same thing and smile at strangers that appraised her from head to toe, wondering if one day she would grow to be a rose they could pluck.

Many had tried. Many still did, as nobles and commoners alike that had come to the Rite of Rebirth stared at her with avid expressions when she as much as beamed at them. None had succeeded so far and she had a feeling, a shuddering, heavy certainty, that none would.

Yet the fear of loneliness, of being back to the cold, harsh streets of Enbarr without her voice as a thread of hope for a better future still thudded within her chest; the years to come, a promise to a better tomorrow just as it had been when she was little. 

She trembled right there and then, at the same moment the last person crossed through the threshold of the gates and she greeted them too. Their eyes roamed over her like others did, but it was the weight of another’s gaze that pulled her out of those thoughts, at the ferociousness of those ideas and the fears that had been in her mind and heart for so long. 

All she had to do was turn around a little to see her house leader gazing at her with a distant expression, then beam at her with a softness that was a far cry from the smiles she had been gifting those strangers out of duty. Her heart throbbed in her chest, not an unusual reaction whenever she locked eyes with the Imperial princess, and she decided to stroll over.

“That was the last one, right?” She inquired in order to start some sort of conversation, as the smaller girl tended to be more silent and keep to herself. 

“I do hope it was,” Edelgard nodded, unable to keep a yawn back, covering her mouth as it went. “I have not seen anything suspicious myself, so I suppose now it is up for the knights to do their own work.”

“Yeah, pretty much. Some of those guys were really weird in a sense, but nothing that I would consider worthy of mentioning. The ones with daggers and other weapons had children with them, so I suppose those were just for self protection,” Dorothea mused, leaning on the rocky wall beside the house leader. 

They were close enough that their hands brushed, but neither pulled away from the contact either. On the few times Edelgard hadn’t been working with Dimitri and Claude she had hung out with Dorothea and the others from her class, which meant she had gotten to know them a little bit better and the songstress the most.

Whenever Ingrid, Petra or the other Black Eagles hadn’t been around, the two of them had discussed more about Thea’s past life, with Edelgard hedging when the issue turned towards her own childhood. Dorothea had known better than to insist however, and was more than happy to respect that and whatever boundary the smaller girl would place. 

It didn’t stop them from bonding, to the point that Dorothea had been feeling a little uneasy about the way she had mistreated and misjudged Edie in the beginning of their relationship. Her initial impression that there was something burdening the princess only grew at their every meeting and interaction, alongside the worry that her words back then had hit a little too close to home. 

“That does make sense, yes,” Edelgard whispered, her eyes going towards the sky filled with stars, a small beam on her face at that alone. As if seeing and feeling the open air around her was all the blessings she needed in that night of sacred ritual. “It is a stunning -”

“Edie, can I ask you something?” Dorothea stuttered before she could stop herself, resisting the urge to grab the princess’s hand in her own and caress it for reassurance. 

“Go ahead, Dorothea,” Edelgard whispered, turning towards the girl in order to give her all the attention. “Is there something specific you would like to discuss?”

“In a sense, yes.” When had been the last time she was that nervous about something like that? She was Dorothea Arnault, former songstress of the MIttelfrank who had charmed countless and made many fall to her feet. Noble or not, they had always been at her command with a snap of her fingers. What was different in that situation? “I wanted to say I’m sorry for how I treated you before.”

She watched in awe as Edelgard’s face fell for one second, before she composed herself and just stared at the taller girl with a mildly surprised expression, as if she had reported that Rhea had turned into a dragon or something like that.

“You - there is nothing to apologize for,” the princess said, glancing away at the floor instead of anywhere else. “I, too, misjudged you and others before. It is a normal thing to do; and if I felt too affected for it before we wouldn’t be talking right now.”

Well, she did have a point for sure - the princess wasn’t one to engage in idle conversation with people she wasn’t comfortable with. She had seen her fair share of Edelgard telling people off or cutting them mid-sentence when they were being obnoxious. Even so, that hadn’t stopped Dorothea from wondering if the girl was just being polite to her out of some sentiment, some kind of solidarity that would be short-lived once Edie realized who exactly she was.

“Even so, though I do appreciate it that you’re not mad at me,” Thea smirked, but her heart was still beating a little bit too fast due to that conversation. It wasn’t like her to be nervous as well, the feeling new and terrifying. “But please accept my apologies.”

Edelgard finally glanced at Dorothea instead of at the floor, gracing her with a smile and not the frown that Thea was waiting for, the rejection and scathing words that had played in her mind over and over whenever she thought about having that conversation with the other girl. The fact that reality was proving to be better than her thoughts just made her night a lot brighter, erasing the disgust that had settled upon her after all those people had eyed her in that way before.

“If it makes you feel any better then yes, I forgive you,” the princess said in a gentle tone, the softest one Dorothea had ever heard her use. After a few seconds in which both simply smiled, she went on: “But only if you forgive me for everything, too.”

The night was one for confessions, the air around them calm and soothing after everyone had gone to the cathedral and only the Black Eagles and some of the guards remained in the front gates. There was a slight breeze that blew around them and enveloped them in a blanket of its own, a bubble that isolated them for all that was happening around the monastery, all the trouble that Byleth and the others were involved at. 

* * *

It took a while for the commotion to die down after the rite was over, people lingering around the food stalls and the archbishop herself, asking for clarification and help on some issues related to their daily lives. It got to the point that Rhea was less than kind when answering them, pretty much walking them to the gates and saying that the Goddess did require them to rest as much as wonder about Her mysteries.

Edelgard (then known as the Flame Emperor since she had donned the accursed costume after Hubert insisted it would be safer that way) had watched the entire thing from behind the building close to the stable, chuckling to herself once figments of those conversations reached her. Still, her body ached after a long day of keeping watch over nothing and the prospect of having to give a report before being allowed to go to bed. 

It still made no sense to her why Arundel had asked for her words over the entire matter instead of just having Jeritza deliver him the news instead. The man had passed by her on his way to his quarters and told her in whispers a summarized version of what had happened in the holy mausoleum.

The moment he had mentioned Byleth getting the interesting-looking sword and how her entire demeanor changed, since he had hung around the place after technically warping out of the room but actually sticking to the shadows so he could better watch over that outcome, Edelgard’s heart had frozen and thudded in pain, her throat constricting and entire body becoming tense. Something inside of her protested that not only was the tomb empty, but that Byleth had apparently been chosen by the sword as well.

For a second or more she had a very distinct vision, something about green surrounding her lover and changing who she was, who she had been before. It was gone the moment she blinked and reality came rushing again, as the gates finally closed and the few Knights of Seiros that hung around Rhea accompanied her back to the entrance hall.

“Now we have some heretics to deal with, I have heard,” the archbishop said, her steps slow and demure as if she knew there was no trouble waiting for her in the dark.

As if she had always known the letter would be a ruse, no matter how much the church staff had fretted over her day after day during the entire month.

“And a sword that perhaps has found its rightful master,” she mumbled before disappearing inside the building, making a shiver run down Edelgard’s spine at the certainty, the smile and the glee contained in those words.

Words that called forth more images to the girl’s mind, so convoluted she couldn’t separate one from the other but was left shaking because of them nonetheless. The feeling that was her shadow while she slipped out of the monastery after making sure no one else was around, then into the small woods nearby where she could see Lord Arundel waiting, was a loneliness so deep she was glad she had been wearing the Flame Emperor’s costume after all. For although she hated and would always hate the outfit, at least the mask and the voice distortion spell meant no one would be able to tell that tears were running down her eyes and her voice was warbled, unstable and unsure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaand the fight comes xD but not without some talking not just between the house leaders, but between Dorothea and Edelgard as well. They needed to speak and should be in good terms too haha  
> In any case, i hope you've been enjoying this rewrite! Thank you for reading and have a nice weekend


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